2. Thinking wilder

I knew, he wouldn't be able to read my Instagram message. Still I hoped like a little to get a reply. I knew I wouldn't get any, but I still hoped. I was expecting a miracle to happen, like a fool!

Few days went by. I started to feel anxious. I really wanted to deliver my message to him somehow. I searched for his personal e-mail ID or e-mail ID for fans. But I couldn't find any. I got furious. I found his house address, though. I decided to personally mail him the message. In the old way. A handwritten letter. Perhaps a love letter. But it wasn't actually a love letter though. It was just a letter. Person to person. It wasn't a fan letter. I didn't want him to know me as just a fan. I wanted to know him personally. I knew that he might have the hottest girlfriend in the world. But I still had to try. I had lost my love once, I wasn't going to lose that easily this time..

I wrote the letter five times, packed them in five different colored envelopes and mailed him one by one, keeping two day's difference. Hoping one of them will reach him somehow. If his PA felt a little bit of sympathy towards me, he might get to read it. He might think about me, and he might try to contact me. I was really foolish. I thought, I had gone mad. But I decided to keep faith. But a month went by. And I didn't get any reply. I got so sad and depressed, that the ghost of my ex-boyfriend started to haunt me again. It was the last thing I wanted in my life. I wasn't allowed to call him or contact him. And I didn't call him even though I was in an agony. I was trying to survive somehow. Maybe I wasn't worthy enough. Or simply he was a too big of a celebrity to even notice that I exist. I was falling into the hole. A hole with endless darkness.

Few months went by. I was a bit better now. I was able to behave normally again. Or I was trying to pretend that I was normal. I used to attend the office, come home, and watch some movies (not his movies) and sleep. That was my routine. I stopped believing in magic. 'Such things doesn't happen in real life.' I told myself and proceeded further.

And one day, my phone rang with unknown number. I received the call assuming either it would be Credit card offers or personal loan offers. But I was wrong. Totally wrong. The person on the phone was asking me some strange questions.

"Am I speaking with Ms. NK?" He asked.

"Yes. It's me." I replied.

"I want to talk regarding an important matter. Do you have some time to spend?" He asked politely.

"Yes. Why not?" I replied humbly, feeling very curious what important matter would it be?

"Ms. NK, we received letter you sent five times. And he has a message for you. I can give you the message if you meet me personally, if you can." He asked even more politely.

I couldn't believe my ears. Such chemical reaction flew through my brain to my heart and then into the entire body, that I couldn't speak a word from the mouth.

"Yes. Yes." I tried to answer him as normally as possible.

"Where do you want to meet then Miss?" He wanted me to decide the place. I thought I could trust him. So I decided the most crowded coffee shop in the city.

"CCD is fine by me." I answered after thinking a little bit.

"Miss, can you specify the exact address of the coffee shop?" He tried to locate the exact location.

"The one near my place. Near jumbo multiplex." I helped to locate him the exact place if meeting.

"Then when we you meet? Is weekend will be fine?" He asked.

"Yes. Saturday is fine. At 3 pm." I decided the timing. It shouldn't be unsafe, I thought to myself.

"Very well then. See you on Saturday Miss. Have a great day." He wished me good day and hung up.

I was feeling so excited and scared at the same time. What if he is a fake? What if this is a scam. I decided to play cool, and meet him. And get out of there if anything would be fishy. Plus it was a busy coffee shop. He wouldn't be able to do anything even if he wanted to. I calmed myself down and decided to go forward with the meeting.

I was hoping it to get true. I wanted my miracle to happen. Maybe it was happening. And I was sinking into it. Feeling light like a feather. Waiting for him.