3 Dummies Guide to Cultivation (pt 3)

Ah, it feels like yesterday that I was teaching you about how to write an mc, and now look how far we've come. Yeah, not very far - barely anywhere actually - but it's still nice to see we have made some progress. It brings a tear to my eye, seeing how little you've grown.

Ok students! today we will discuss a key element, something that propels the plot forward no matter what. Something that will terrorize our mc at every restaurant and every girl he happens to be interested in romantically. A boogie man of a sort. Its name is... the antagonist!

Well, the plural form may be better suited since the line of people trying to kill him is longer than the list of problems wrong with me, but that's for later!

Right now, what we are worried about is how we make a villain that is as loveable as the crazy aunt that you have to hide the silverware from when she comes over for thanksgiving. Should the enemy be a foil to our mc? Should there logic and reasoning be a polar opposite to the mc, yet make enough sense that even the readers will question the morality of both sides? *Smack* you fool! What did I say about originality! don't go around trying to make a 3-course 5-star meal when you work at McDonald's. What we serve is fast, easy junk food, not that DiGiorno bullshit.

Now, who is this baddie? Well, he is the city lord's/sect master's son with oh so much talent. His talent is so great that after every sentence that his name is included in, it is required that the speaker must include the phrase "He is so strong, only a fool would try to stop him".

He is also a throbbing asshat. Since he is the bad guy, you must make sure he is as hateable as the mc's good fortune is undeserved. Have him whip the old men on the side of the road and trample pregnant women as he orders his tea. No one should like this guy, but that won't stop him from having some buddies to follow him along.

Wherever he goes, a posse of hype men follows along. Their main job is to praise his every moment and exclaim how no one can do it better than him, as well as remind everyone that he is, in fact, Mr. big shot's kid. From drinking water to banging the waiter's head on the table, everyone believes that he is the perfect little boy scout and that only his dad could be worthy of such a son.

Since he is the antagonist, the villain must come across the hero in some form of way. Too stupid to think of an original way to do it? Well you better kiss your lucky stars, cause you are in luck!

I have a secret, completely not overused, patented technique that I like to call "spilled tea, last french fry". You see, it requires only one restaurant and a small sacrifice consisting of your remaining creativity (Normally your soul would also be needed, but we both know neither of us have that).

Now have the protagonist walk in, and either bump into the villain and spill his tea, or pick a table and order the last plate of french fries. The former is self-explanatory, but the latter has an undercurrent to it! French fries... is the villain's favorite food, so the only way he can get his fix is through threats of violence towards the innocent mc! Either way, the villain will demand that our good hero cripple himself to apologize for his complete lack of manners and give over the lady friend our mc picked up somewhere by saving her from bandits.

The mc will decline with the grace befitting of him, by cursing the villain's mother and threatening to cripple his peen for insulting his harem memb- uh... friend. Now, after he turns red and generically shouts "You!!!", have him attack with his coolest move while his entourage faints from his pure awesomeness.

Obviously your mc will spank him, touting how pathetic he is for even thinking about beating him, and send him off on his way. Make sure that as he runs away he screams "You will pay!!! My daddy is a scary guy!" and gnashes his teeth like a starving squirrel.

All is taken care of. The enemy is beat, and the hero is victorious. Now all that's left is- wait a minute. What is that rising dust cloud that is slowly getting closer? Ah, what a twist! The real bad guy was not him, but his extended family!

Now he must fight his cousin, who has a friend in a sect, who has one free favor he can ask the sect master, who is subordinate to a kingdom that rules the hemisphere! And just like that, you have enough plot to drag out to 2000 chapters!

Congrats, the making of a book is almost complete! Get this part of your story done and get ready for the next chapter, this ride is almost over - you are close to being fully prepared.