Therapy

Earth standard time 2841.7.28

The hum of the sub light engines were like a lullaby for Rudolf. He had been onboard the Hand of Fire for so long that it was difficult to sleep without the humming. Then again it was difficult to sleep regardless.

Captain Reis was currently seeing his doctor concerning the migraines that continued to plague him. At times they made it hard for him to think which was unacceptable for someone in his position. He had put off seeing the doctor for too long already. And after the meeting with the admiral he couldn't put it off any longer.

"Captain, your migraine seems to be psychological." The doctor was Dr.Elizabeth Kolsey. She treated all the commissioned officers onboard and Rudolf trusted her with his life, literally. If she said it was psychological then he wouldn't argue the point further.

"What should i do then doctor? I can't keep using sleep medication and I can't take powerful painkillers while on duty."

Rudolf sat on the chair opposite the doctor uncomfortably. Elizabeth was probably the only person alive who had ever seen Rudolf act childish.

She didn't mind it though, not after knowing him for so long. She still recalled the day Sophia disappeared, Rudolf went into a blind rage. He ordered orbital bombardments on every Conclave world he came across. He took no prisoners and led his battle fleet Ra on a crusade of total war that cut through four enemy sectors which led to the loss of twelve Conclave solar systems.

Elizabeth sighed deeply.

"You know the answer, psychotherapy. I can't do it myself but we have excellent psychiatrists onboard that can really help you."

"I don't like the idea of it. Is there another way?" Rudolf disliked someone knowing him too well. He also felt uncomfortable speaking to a stranger for long periods of time concerning topics that were more than just sensitive.

"Honestly Rudolf your stubbornness may as well be legendary. Let's rephrase my statement to be clear. Psychotherapy is the only way to help you." It seemed like it was Elizabeth's turn to have a migraine.

"Dr.Vensano is an excellent psychiatrist with years of experience and I trust him completely. So you should at least give him a try."

"Was he born onboard?" Rudolf didn't like the idea but he was running out of options.

"He was."

Elizabeth knew he would ask that, it's the reason she recommended Dr.Vensano. It couldn't be helped. It was hard enough for him to speak to a stranger about his issues, but it made it much easier if it was someone born on the Hand of Fire.

It was common for star ships that traveled across the galaxy for long periods of time to build trust issues against foreigners. This was even more prevalent onboard military vessels as large as the Hand of Fire which rarely reached ports of call.

Those born on the Hand of Fire were technically citizens of the Autarchy and the lords fief, which in this case would be Cestia and the lord Rudolf. Thus they were trusted by the citizens onboard. On the other hand those who came from other worlds and other sectors were largely ignored. Some were even harassed and treated negatively if they were of a low rank. This would go on till they served about a year, once that happened their treatment would largely improve. If they served the first five years and left a good impression they would usually be accepted by the crew.

Elizabeth didn't like how Rudolf turned a blind eye to this. She especially didn't like how he felt the same way, but what could she do? No one was perfect, in the end Rudolf was only Human.

"Fine, i'll give it a try. I'll reach out to him as soon as i get back to my cabin." Rudolf would not reach out to him.

"Don't worry Captain, i'll handle it. Your first session will be tomorrow evening." Elizabeth gave Rudolf an arrogant smile. She knew her idiot captain would chicken out.

Damn it…"Thank you doctor." Rudolf held in a sigh, it wouldn't end well if she caught him sighing.

Rudolf left Elizabeth's office in low spirits, even lower than when he first went in. This tended to happen though so it was alright.

Time to get some food i suppose, thought Rudolf as he made his way to the mess hall. Rudolf tended to eat alone, not because he was the Captain but because he tended to eat his meals much later than the other commissioned officers. He barely slept so it worked out, if not he would get hungry in the middle of the night.

Three decks and a twenty minute walk later and Rudolf made it to the officers mess. To his surprise someone was there, Lieutenants Aron and Minhaj.

"Good evening Lieutenants. How's the food?"

"As good as it'll ever be Cap'n." Lieutenant Miranda Aron was an off worlder born on one of the three great ports, specifically Port Wolf located in the Faust sector. Why she was still just a communications office boggled Rudolf's mind. She had on more than one occasion declined promotions onboard and portside. Rudolf knew she was a former pirate since it was on her file when she first came onboard twenty years ago, but he didn't know why that would make her decline her promotions. Former pirates were not common in the Navy but they weren't rare either.

That goldfish-brained Admiral Richard Rosenthal was a former pirate and look at him now. Why he was best friends with such a fool also boggled the mind. Too bad Rosenthal was still leading the crusading fleet Gargantua into Synthetic space. Rudolf at first hoped his friend was doing well, until he then remembered all the embarrassing shite he put him through then he hoped for at least a light injury and at worst a near death experience.

Rudolf walked over to get his food from the pickup station then sat down with his mates.

"Meatloaf again? Maybe i should speak to the chef?" Rudolf stared down at his meal. A piece of meatloaf, steamed vegetables, potato soup, and what looked like a deconstructed apple pie.

The ship had an agriculture unit that grew the majority of the food consumed onboard. That's why Rudolf knew that there was no actual meat in the meatloaf. Instead it was a substitute made up of several vegetables and starches. The rest of the food products were flash frozen for emergencies.

"Please don't Captain. Don't you remember what happened last time?"

"Unfortunately I do Lieutenant Minhaj." Rudolf let out the sigh he had been holding in since leaving the doctors office.

"Cap'n, it's just us c'mon now." Miranda had a friendly and outgoing personality which Rudolf appreciated. It helped him communicate with his peers while she was around.

Miranda had light brown hair that reached just below her shoulders and had similar colored eyes. Her physique was toned and tall. She was at least five feet nine inches tall and would normally be called a beauty if it wasn't for her personality.

"I apologize Miranda, Hasan."

"Don't sweat it Captain." Hasan never spoke much, but when he did it was at least meaningful.

Hasan was a tall man that stood over six feet three inches tall. He also had brown hair and eyes, although darker than Mirandas. He was by all accounts very large as it showed he trained his muscles constantly. His hair was perfectly cut to military standards with no facial hair to speak off.

Rudolf nodded to thank Hasan. "Hasan, I was informed by Miranda that you were born in the fortress world of Verdun, can you tell me anything relevant about the space around the planet?"

"I wrote up the report and sent it to your station as requested. Unfortunately i can't tell you much about it." Hasan put his utensils down and took a sip of water before continuing.

"I was born in Verdun and had my military training there from the age of fifteen till I was twenty five before being shipped off to the front line worlds. The planet is completely militarized and so is the space around it." Hasan quickly finished the rest of his meal before continuing. None of the three stopped eating. Eating quickly was drilled into each of them and if they took too long it would cut into their work.

"I'll be frank Rudolf. I don't see how any pirate-like activity could ever happen within a blink of the planet." Hasan looked at his watch to make sure he hadn't extended his meal too long. He still had a host of tasks to complete before he went to bed after all.

"I see, thank you Hasan. I agree with you based on the information I received not only from you but also the ships database."

"I don't like that look Cap'n, what are we waltzin into?" Miranda was sharp, Rudolf also appreciated that about her. Although if she wasn't a commissioned officer he may think it was a problem instead.

"I'm not sure, that's why I'm preparing for the worst." Rudolf had also finished his meal and was getting ready to return the tray before leaving the mess.

"But i will be pissed as shite if there's no pirates." Rudolf doubted the Admiral was pulling some stupid prank but something wasn't right.

"Haha… You get'em Cap'n!"

Rudolf had left the mess as quickly as he came in leaving the two Lieutenants alone again.

"So Hasan, when are you going to tell the Cap'n you turned down a transfer to sector command?" Maranda took an unnecessarily strong slurp of her drink finishing it off with gusto. Which Hasan found odd since it was just water, but then again she always did that and he always found it odd.

"I'll inform him through a formal missive when i return to my cabin."

"You like it here don'cha." Miranda gave the departing Hasan a mischievous smile.

"And you don't?"

Earth standard time 2841.7.29

Rudolf stood uncomfortably outside the medical ward. Several crew members shuffled past him confused as to why their captain was just standing there like a grumpy statue.

The Hand of Fire had actually reached its destination nearly two hours ago but found nothing except some strange radioactive readings.

What Rudolf found most unfortunate was that his bridge and science teams didn't need him to do their jobs and Elizabeth knew this. Which meant he had no excuse left to avoid his first psychotherapy session.

"Captain, are you going in? You'll be late if you just stand here you know?"

Rudolf turned around and saw a young man probably in his mid forties. He had blond hair, blue eyes, and a slim but strong build. Rudolf was sure if Miranda was here she would jump the lad like he was a plate of desserts. Good desserts, not the fake stuff they served onboard.

Rudolf saw the man was wearing a name tag that read Dr.Vensano.

F*ck, he had almost built up the courage to run away too. No matter how frightening Elizabeth was, Rudolf was still the captain and was certain she would only lightly injury him at worst.

"Hello Doctor Vensano. Unfortunately it seems we have arrived at our destination and I am needed at the bridge so we must reschedule."

Dr.Vensano nodded sagely at Rudolf's words before replying. "I see, it is understandable since you are the Captain."

Rudolf Reis almost saw the light at the end of the tunnel, almost.

"But it's strange, I heard from Dr.Kolsey that she spoke to your bridge team and they clearly stated that your presence was not needed, and it was safe for you to attend the session to its fullest." Dr.Vensano was sharp… too sharp for Rudolf's taste. Why was he sharp you ask, well it was that damn glint in his eyes. He knew he had Rudolf cornered and there was no way out.

"I see, well let's go inside shall we?" Rudolf was skewed and Dr.Vensano knew it.

He would deal with his bridge team later.

"Of course after you, and don't worry I'm certain your bridge team will immediately contact you if there's a need."

The room was neat and homely, at least Rudolf thought so.

Everything looked like wood from the wallpaper to the furnishings. Of course there was no real wood here, it was all either reinforced carbon wallpaper or hollowed out nano plastics. If not it would be unnecessarily heavy and too easily damaged. Still Rudolf sat on one of the chairs and lamented how much more comfortable it was than his captain's chair on the bridge.

"I have heard that you can barely sleep at night and have regular long migraine headaches that have no other explanation than being caused by stress or other psychological triggers?" Dr.Vansano was not the type to probe, he liked getting to the point when dealing with someone like Rudolf.

"Was that a question?"

"Yes, and no. Captain, i would like you to tell me in your own words why you're here."

"I'm here to ensure my mental health is at a functional standard."

"Functional, i see. Could you define that for me?"

The session lasted for an hour. Rudolf and Dr.Vensano spoke the entire time which truly surprised Rudolf. He wondered how the doctor was able to keep him talking for so long without rest.

And the things he got out of him… were truly frightening. Sometimes Rudolf felt like he was being interrogated, but softly. It didn't really help his sleep and migraine issues, at least Rudolf didn't think it did.

"Captain before you go, please remember this is only the first session. We will slowly work towards your recovery. With that said I'll see you in two days." Dr.Vensano waved at Rudolf as he was walking out.

Rudolf quickly turned around and saw the doctor smiling cheerfully.

"Two days?"

Before the doctor could reply an alarm sounded and Captain Reis was contacted to return to the bridge immediately.