6 The Cost of Freedom

"Leave!" I snap at him, staring at him in complete anger. He freezes and I harshly pull my arm out of his grip as he stays there to stare at me. I ignore him.

I gently brush away Tukare's hair from her face as I try to stop the bleeding with my hands. I sob harder as I look around to find any clean cloth to stop the bleeding and prevent her from getting infected. But there was nothing. We had nothing.

I tore of half of the shirt I was wearing and press it to Tukare's shoulder tightly.

I felt empty as I cried. I cried in fear. I cried in desperation. I cried in remorse. I don't mind staying trapped here forever if it meant I'd have Tukare safe.

"I'm sorry... I'm sorry..." I took Tukare's remaining hand placed my cheek at its back, crying remorsefully.

It's my fault. It's all my fault... If only I had...

Tukare wiped the tears off my cheek. I stared blankly at her face as I saw her smiling lightly. Through our connection, I could not feel a single blame, just worry and affection. A feeling that said that she only wanted what's best for me--love.

The tears in my eyes fell, as Tukare quietly stared not at me, but Laris behind me.

"Please", was all she whispered.

In disbelief, I shook my head as Tukare said, "Go."

I watched her figure disappear as Laris took the chance to carry me away. The only memory playing on my mind was her mouthing one word--live--as she closed her eyes slowly after as if accepting eternal tranquility. As if she knew that her death meant my freedom. That I would have nothing to go back here for.

I felt our connection break. I gasped. But I couldn't breathe properly, grasping hard at the clothes on Laris' back. My sight blurred as I didn't know I fainted.

It's all my fault.

I do not know how long we have travelled for, or to what direction, but the moment my eyes opened, I saw the fluttering of the tent I was in. My wounds have been treated, my bruises covered in a pungent healing cream I'm not familiar with, and my clothes changed to new ones.

One by one, my tears start to fall, finding their way from the sides of my eyes to my temples and onto the makeshift pillow of the makeshift bed I lay upon.

What do I do now?

When your reason for working hard, for striving hard has been stripped away from you in front of your eyes, how do you live? What do you live for? When your only family left...

I covered my eyes with an arm, biting my lips to stop myself from sobbing.

It felt like hours had passed by before I had no more tears left to produce. My tired eyes shuddered for a moment until I fell asleep again, praying to whomever so that I can dream of Tukare to comfort my loneliness; to comfort the part of me that would just never feel right again or whole.

I awoke to the sound of cheerful laughter outside of the tent. For quite some time, I stared at the tent above me while listening in to their voices and bantering. Decided, I sit up and glance at the entryway that was flapping in the breeze.

Slowly, I walked out of the tent, the brightness of the afternoon sun stinging my sore eyes. Suddenly, everyone remained quiet as all eyes fell on me. Some observant. Some with anger. Some with ridicule. Most with unfathomable expressions.

Scanning their faces, I could not see anyone I was familiar to. My fists clench. I seem to be at the lycan rebel camp.

A young man approaches me and I take two steps away from him, watching his every move. He raises his two hands as if to say that he does not mean to harm me. One of his hand holding a wooden cup of water which was offered to me.

"You must be thirsty. You've slept for two days straight."

Cautiously, I take the cup from him but do not drink it right away. He uses this opportunity to grab some food nearby and offer it to me but a hand grabs his wrist.

"Why give him food? Isn't he the reason why half of our comrades caught by the guards got killed?" Another young man with a few piercings in his ear directed a scrutinizing gaze at me.

Another person spoke up, "No, it was the other, the girl. Heard she's dead now", that person said almost testingly, but I was too hurt to notice.

My grip around the cup tightens as I stare at the ground.

"As she should", the person with the piercings said, oblivious to his comrade's purpose. "How many of us had died all because she talked."

"Oy, that's enough--", the young man who gave me water tried to intervene. Unfortunately, things were too far from saving.

".... of water"

"Ha? What did you say?", the young man with piercings said irritably.

"All for a damn cup of water", I said more loudly this time, staring hard at him for a couple of seconds before avoiding his gaze so I don't connect with him. "My sister forced herself to interrogate so many of you all for a cup of damn water. She died for what, a piece of bread?" I whispered the last part in its ridiculousness. "They barely fed us as it is for the past week... But I fainted in my... So I wouldn't get to eat for another week so she...", my voice shook.

I raised my head and moved my gaze to linger at the face of everyone around for a couple of seconds. This time, not one was willing to look at me, except for a few and the guy with piercings, who stared at me steadily. As if not a word I said would get to him.

We are just to different.

"Quick to kill. Quick to harm; to see only yourselves and your agendas, never caring how you affect others... Always bloodthirsty. Always angry. Always disgusted with us... Not seeing the reflections of your actions and hypocrisy as the truly vile...", I pause.

"You lycans are all the same", I hatefully said.

I turned around to see a vast expanse of forest that hid the small camp. I noticed a small sapling with barely two leaves, sticking out in a place far from the trees and bushes. I glance at my cup before I walk over to it and pour the cup of water on it, gently rubbing a leaf, before placing the empty cup beside it.

"I don't need your food, nor your water. If you wish to kill me, then go ahead. I have nothing left anyway", I sadly spoke.

I'm not so low as to beg for the grace of my captors.

I didn't turn back as I straightforwardly left their camp and walked into the forest. I had expected them to strike me at some point or to have at least stopped me from leaving, but none of that happened.

Little did I know that Laris had come out of a nearby tent after I left. A young girl with the same hair and matching set of eye colors, around the same age as him stood beside him with the same profound and unfathomable look Laris had, as they both stared at the direction I disappeared into.