Reviews of Vergil in another world (Reboot Up)
Vergil in another world (Reboot Up)
ChocoCrinkols
- Overall Rate
- Writing Quality
- Updating Stability
- Story Development
- Character Design
- world background
So here is my review, sorry for being harsh to you author. First off, if you are looking for a great, well-written history this is not for you. The novel is full of potholes as the author himself admitted, and he writes mainly for fun. Well if you are a fan of these cliche DxD fanfics on this site, this one is better than those. My review is rather long, so if you don't to read everything just scroll down to the end. Writing Quality: 4/5- The novel has a bunch of grammar errors but nothing major. Compared to the novels on this site, the grammar is good and only grammar nazis would be bothered by it. Stability of Updates: 5/5- So far the author keeps releasing chapters at a decent rate. Story Development: 2/5- And this where all the problems begin. Let's have a look at how the MC was sent to the DxD world. He meets God who gives three powers to him, and each of these powers is a wish of his parents. Now, why would a god bother giving a wish to random mortals with so many people on Earth? No reason was given, the MC never bothered to ask why as well, he just accepted everything. It was hinted that it could be for God's entertainment, but it still felt forced for the MC to never think about that. The rest of the history is the usual predictable cliche. MC gets immense powers right from the initial chapters, though I praise the author for at least including a training arc. He then proceeds to go around showing off these powers because the author wants us to think the MC is "cool", using cliche stuff like brats from powerful families challenging the MC to a spar, and trying to kill him during the said spar, and the MC humiliates them to assort dominance and blah blah blah. Also, it's a system novel with summons from other anime, so the MC who is already strong will have a bunch of OP characters as well to help him besides having some of these characters into his harem. Yes, it's a harem. Character Design: 2/5- And there are also problems with this part. Let's start with the MC personality. The MC at least has some unique traits, like liking books and art, but he still acts like any cliche Chinese novel protagonist. In his first battle he killed left and right without any kind of mercy, I wouldn't bother about this if the author explained why he is so ruthless, but he didn't explain anything. His first kill ever and he didn't even blink! The MC immediately turned into a cold killer once he entered that world for no reason. His first kill went like this: "He sliced his enemy head off, the end." This only would be possible if the MC was some kind of psychopath or sociopath, but he cares about his friends like any other normal person. Also on his fight with the "young master", he cut his arm off and told him and his family that they should be glad because he usually killed those that tried to kill him. What? He is literally a child at that point and only fought a single time in that world, his old world also does not count since he didn't kill anyone there, so he only started killing his enemies a day ago. For some reason, the author is acting like he is some kind of certified badass who has killed countless people since his previous life. The other characters are as 2D as 2D can get, nothing is interesting about them. I'm sure 99% of this novel readers only care about the MC. World Background:3/5- It's a fanfic, so don't expect any major world-building. The author did some creative stuff like adding another anime into the DxD universe to give humans power, but that was it. In a nutshell: This novel has a very cliche MC that changes his personality to fit the author's tastes and goes around showing off his immense power to the world, a bunch of plotholes, is a harem system novel with summons, and progresses like all the usual cliche novels out there. It has some good stuff though. To the author: Sorry for criticizing your novel so much mate, but you can't correct your errors without knowing them. You are welcome to talk badly about my novel too, just don't get discouraged by my review, ok :v? Keep writing cause you have readers that like your work, no novel is perfect including mine, it's all cool as long as you are happy writing it.
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The MC's OP dope...the story is also interesting...just the last chp..the paragraphs were too long......make them a bit smaller,,,long paragraphs are annoying to read....anyway..Keep MC OP and smart..not a perverted idiot....Add some romance and fluff..just build it...dont make MC or his lovers shallow..if harem keep it small..Add some bash.......just dont make MC go after wives or moms.... anyway GL **: Maybe SI instead of OC?....EX: Make MC reincarnate as the master or kuroka when he got them...but change his name to Vergil...? MC is a few years before cannon...could do some ****? would be cool MC hides his power and uses a secret identity to just show whos boss....world travel...but before cannon...ex: One piece few years before cannon...?.....Fairy tail..400 years before?..or some Chinese novel??
To be honest i think a rewrite woudn't be a bad thing,i mean the whole summoning people from other worlds is too much of a mess to be honest and it just poluted the story. Also,if you do rewrite it try to take it easy on his power level,i mean in this one vergil could defeat sirzechs and he is not even 10 years old.I have no problem with vergil surpassing sirzechs but not before his teens,otherwise it would be too unbelievable and thats not even taking the fact that sirzechs is much more experienced than vergil as not only he fought in a war but also is hundreds of years old.
Pretty good, only that i hope he doesn't send kuroka to khaos whatever group. he's already strong enough though. You wouldn't send your wife to some strong organization just for info gathering right? who knows what kinds of affairs she would do behind your back whether by her own will or because she is forced. What's the use of that hacker under his wings then. Please don't do that. I and some others i'm sure of will drop this if that happens. Also, he must make some safety regarding his harem as his house contain many males as his underling. Imagine luffy with his ship where there is saji who have chance everyday to get laid with nami or robin whether by their own will or by food poisoning.
your novel is good author, I hope this novel will continue, oh yes actually I have a suggestion, it would be nice when mc gets married all the high-ranking worlds he has explored are invited to the wedding of the Mc, for example, invite the world government of one piece or gorosei+ Im the same too, so that he knows about other worlds, and can have a distant view, who knows the world government in the One Piece world can change by seeing the great power figures of various worlds, and that also adds a lot of plots and ideas to the author so that he can extend the next chapters, or the author can make interesting things yourself with the ideas above,... that's all from me, and thanks for the last chapter even though some of the stories are a bit boring but I try to enjoy the chapters in the future,.. that's all from me, thank you and have a nice day xD
