5 IV.
IV.
"That shit is just a burden!!.".Jonakyn didn't open her eyes, she continued listening even if she doesn't want to.
" You shouldn't have raised that shit!! You could just give that kid to her idiot father". She didn't budge or cry
Why would she do that it's not like it's the first time?
"That shit is a shit, you idiot". After the commotion died down she went outside locking her room then look around ensuring the hallway is empty.
Before it scares her getting out of her room it's her sanctuary she felt relief every time she's inside not just the room itself but the things in it make her at peace but jonakyn needs to go out because even if she's at ease on her room she still needs to get out.
They are complaining about her locking inside making assumptions like she's just being tardy or an idiot who's rebelling and this respectful." Overacting hypocrite". She said pointing at a family picture hanged on the wall in the hallway what a nice picture she looks like being taken well." Tsk..tsk". She continued walking down after.
This was her routine every morning, waking up early tidying everything's up and hid back into her room wait till her so-called parents finish and go to work before leaving the house.
Some could say she's like a modern Cinderella or just a plain maid even if she was a part of the family, family her ass they never treated her like a family didn't even treat her with respect they just think of her as a burden ora speck of dirt that they can't get rid of because of their conscience.
"What a life!". Jonakyn whispered while heading down the stairs but when she passed by the kitchen she stopped.
"Good Morning Mom". She greeted after seeing her mother eating breakfast on the counter.
"You're leaving without having a brunch". Her mother said while looking at the sandwich she's slicing. Jonakyn was appalled looking at her mother never thought of doing this for her.
"You get that sandwich on the paper bag it's your, eat that". Her mother said motioning a paper bag on the edge of the counter, she was still confused while getting the paper bag before leaving.
" the heck why is this piece of sandwich making me cry.". Jonakyn was smiling while shedding tears this is rare her mother making her breakfast like she always does this before, brings back memories
Memories of her past that she can only be remembered but can't have back.
--
" oh.. why is my baby crying?". I looked at her while wiping my face full of tears, her face that calms me whenever I'm scared or sad that smiling face I always loved to see. "Tell me baby hmm stop crying already okay". She again said to me while smiling
I looked at her and cried but instead of pity, I see the love in her eyes why is she always like this unlike other whom, I got to encounter who looks at me with pity in their eyes or those bully who loved to make fun of me because I look different and act differently from the other kids.
" They said I'm mistake child mom that I should've been born and that I look ugly and don't look like a Filipino". I didn't stutter while saying those words to her I didn't even have any reactions on my face even though my eyes are still tearing at my age I think advanced than the other.
I talk straight and won't stutter some would think it's nice but others think I'll be tackless and disrespectful having an attitude like mine would anger elders to the bones.
After hearing what I said Mom smiled then hug me tightly saying." you know you not like that baby, your special their just too blind to see that". She said stopping me from crying I smiled and hug her back I could feel the warmth I'm addicted too it's like I'm safe and protected from those who want to hurt me.
At the age of 5, I've read so many books but I can never explain this warmth mom hugs could give me.
" You know that her father left me Mom even when he knew I was pregnant with Jonakyn I tried to find him but the idiot disappear like a bubble".
Tears fall from my eyes down to my cheeks after hearing my mom.
she was talking with grandma a while ago when I played under the table earlier than them who just arrived I didn't care about it so I stayed silent and went back to playing but when they started talking about my father It got my attention.
" she was bullied Lyn!! your daughter was bullied and yet your doing nothing".Grandma hissed.
"Jonakyn is strong I know she is".
"She deserves to know the truth Lyn you at her age she's mature and can comprehend the situation.". Grandma again said to Mom.
" I will but she's still too young to handle everything she's still a kid Mom no matter how she thinks maturely she's still 5 years old". Mom said calmly I think to make Grandma calm too.
"Do it quickly it hurts seeing my granddaughter being bullied cause she's illegitimate even if she's the legal daughter, not those snake children her father was taking care of".
I didn't know what happens next cause mom and grandma continued talking outside I didn't move nor react after hearing even my heads continued generalizing the things I've heard but after a minute nothing came to me but tears.
" It hurts". I said as I was clutching my chest something inside me hurts so much that my brain wouldn't function I can't seem to comprehend everything they talk about but something inside me hurts and that's causing the tears I'm shedding.
I hastily come out under the table and find mom I think I need her hugs something inside me hurts and I didn't know why."Mom!". I yelled while looking around Mom instantly came out looking worried.
"What happened baby?..why are you crying?. is something hurts?".she asked worriedly I look at her and open my arms. " Mom I need a hug". I said to her while crying she was confused but didn't think twice about hugging me.
"You scared me to death you brat I thought you hurt yourself!". She hissed but still tightening the hug I didn't answer her I just hug her tight and feel the relief her hug was giving taking all the pain away. " I love you Mom". I whispered enough for her to hear." I love you too baby". She replied kissing my cheeks making me smile.
" you hungry baby". Mom said still hugging me I nod, she lifts me and carries me to the kitchen puts me on the counter, and starts preparing foods." Mom I want cheese". She looked at me and smiled." A dish with Cheese it is madam". She joked making me giggle.
Mom is amazing she always does things like this to me even though she's busy working she never forgets to cook me breakfast and dinner or any dish I want every day off."Mom you won't leave me alone right.". Mom looked at me confusedly." I won't why would you think I'll do that". She said smiling.
" Promise me first". I said sternly Mom laughed at my face but then become serious.
"I won't I promise".
--
" Hey!! are you crying?". Jonakyn was snapped back to reality when her cousin slap her." What the!!".she hissed at her cousin that slap hurts.
" Why are you crying did he hurt you again?". Her cousin seriously asked jonakyn shakes her head." No I'm just happy". She said smiling.
" that's the cause of skipping breakfast eh thank God I'm not skipping it". Jonakyn didn't care about what her cousin just said she continued walking with a smile.
"Thank you Mom".she whispered.
