Chapter 15

The fruit of love

Kamran was struggling to get up from his bed as Tamina entered his room with food on a tray. He was now ready to go to the hospital to get his Tuberculosis treated as there was no foreigners as staffs in the hospital. Leaving the tray on a table, Tamina was about to leave, but saw her father struggling to put on his robe.

‘ Do you need any help, father? ‘. Tamina asked.

‘ Yes, call your mother. ‘ Kamraan instructed. Tamina nodded and went to the kitchen for her mother, but Aisha was already on her way.

‘ Father needs your help. ‘ Tamina said.

‘ Mmmm'. Aisha replied.

Tamina stood there, looking at her mother. She was lost, she felt empty and was drowning in depression. Jacob’s departure had caused a huge hole in her heart and the only person she could talk about it was Farah. It was sometimes hard and she saw no hope of Jacob’s return, but sometimes, she hoped foolishly for him, forcing herself to hang on a false hope that she had created herself.

Nobody at her home cared about how she felt, or if she was hurting. Kamraan was now busy going to the hospital to get himself treated and Aisha was still drowned in the sorrow of her son’s untimely demise. She felt alone in that house of three people. The only comfort she had was Farah, who never blamed her and was there for her without any judgements. As days passed, Tamina fell deeper and deeper into the darkness of depression and took sick leave from the hospital. Farah knew something was off about her cousin and went on to check on Tamina. Seeing her cousin, broke her heart into pieces. Tamina was sitting on the floor leaning on her bed and staring at the wall as Farah walked in.

‘ Tami? ‘. Farah sat down in front of Tamina.

‘Mmm’. Tamina hummed.

‘ Have you eaten anything? They say you were on sick leave ? What happened? Are you sick? ‘. Farah asked in a single breath.

‘Mmm'. Tamina hummed again.

‘ Tami? ‘. Farah could see the pain in her cousin’s eyes.

‘ Let’s eat. I am starving for Khala's soup. Come on’. Farah said trying to pull her cousin up from the floor.

‘ Mmmm. ‘ Tamina hummed again. Farah stopped in midway and looked at Tamina who was still staring at the wall as entrapped in another world.

‘ Are you ok? ‘. Farah asked and Tamina hummed again.

‘ Tamina!!! Answer me. Are you hurting or in pain?. Tell me. I am here for you. Just for you. Please tell me. ‘ Farah's voice cracked at the end. Startled at Farah’s yelling, Tamina for the first time, made eye contact with her cousin.

‘ You are here? ‘. Tamina asked.

‘ Yes, I am. Are you ok? ‘. Farah asked again.

‘ I hurts, in here. I can’t breath. My throat ache every time I cry. What should I do? ‘. Tamina said placing Farah’s hand on her chest.

‘ It’s ok. You are strong and you will overcome this. God will help you overcome this. Pray. ‘ Farah said.

‘ You think so? I now feels like he is punishing me for loving someone who doesn’t believe in him, Fari. I am being punished, isn’t it? ‘. Tamina asked.

‘ I don’t think so. I think our God doesn’t discriminate humans. Every one is equal before the God I believe in. Have you forgot? Col. Barnes told you to not feel guilty about loving him.’ Farah said.

‘ I am not. It just, I can’t contain this pain within me. I can’t even cry my heart out as my parents would hear me from the next room. If they asks me, how am I supposed to tell that I am crying for a man who had left me and that too, a foreigner? . You know my father, he won’t ever forgive me. ‘ Tamina said, this time breaking down in front of her best friend. Farah enveloped her in a hug.

‘ Listen to me, whatever happens, you have to keep on living, Tami. Whatever happened had happened and it was not in our power to stop things from happening. If he truly loves you, he will come back for you. You can still wait for him while moving forward. You know what I mean. Pretend in front of everyone that you are okay, but you can breakdown and put your walls down in front of me or when you are being alone. Don’t let the norms of these society label you as an outcast women who got involved with a foreigner.’ Farah said wiping Tamina's tears.

‘ Please stay like this. ‘ Tamina said and hugged Farah again.

‘ Thank you God, for giving her as my cousin. ‘ Tamina said burying her face in Farah’s chest and Farah smiled at her cousin’s words.

‘ I won’t let you be alone from now onwards, Tami. Prepare to suffer me for the whole day.’ Farah said and Tamina chuckled amidst the crying which made Farah smile.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The capital city has somewhat calmed down as the racist protest groups got arrested by the police. As the leaders got arrested, the pace of the protests slowed down a bit and it stopped for a while before entering into Belgarath from Bayadar. The government brutally punished the protesters as it faced huge criticisms from the rest of the world. Using force, the government suppressed the protests and allowed the refugees into the country in North to make their statement clear to it’s citizens as well as to the rest of the world that they doesn’t support the racist norms and concepts.

The US government was still in conflict with the national government as it was their citizens who got murdered the most by the racist groups and they strictly denied any allies with the national government. Not only that, the US government even banned it’s citizens from entering into Tamina’s country.

Dr. Amir has been in contact with Professor Lee but hadn’t seen col. Barnes after they had entered into the country. Dr. Amir knew that the legate was heart broken and was worried for him. Dr. Amir searched for col. Barnes who had went AWOL since the last day they entered into the country. Dr. Amir stood now in front of the door of a room in a cheap motel in which the colonel was supposed to be living as per the information he got on him. He knocked on the door, and it was ajar. The doctor slowly opened the door and the smell of alcohol pierced his nose and he scrunched it in disgust. The room was dark as the only light entering it was through the window which was covered by white, dusty curtains. In that dull ambience, Dr. Amir saw a man sitting on the floor, with a bottle of alcohol in his hands, leaning against the wall with closed eyes. The opening of the door made a creaky noise which made col. Barnes to open his eyes and look at the intruder.

‘ Who is that? ‘. Col. Barnes asked looking at the doctor in the dim light.

‘ At first, I thought I couldn’t recognize you because of the little light in the room, but now I see the reason. Nobody would recognize you even under the sun, col. Barnes. ‘ Dr. Amir said looking at his friend unbelievably as now Col. Barnes was not the clean shaved, neat man Dr. Amir had known. He now looked like a poet or a writer who was writing the tragic ending of his story, drowning in the sorrow. It has only been less than a month and Col. Barnes had now grown a beard and a moustache and had bags under his eyes. Smell of alcohol and sweat reeked from the room which made Dr. Amir to gag.

‘ This is how you are living your life now? ‘. Dr. Amir asked baffled at the site ahead him.

‘ Dr. Amir? ‘. Col. Barnes asked recognizing his friend’s voice.

‘ Thank god! You recognized me. ‘ Dr. Amir said in relief and walked towards Jacob and sat opposite him on a chair.

‘ Seeing the state you are in, I guess you have heard about the government’s order. We can’t go back now, colonel. ‘ Dr. Amir said with disappointment in his words.

‘ No, I will, somehow, I will go back to her.’ Col. Barnes said.

‘ How?. Our embassy is not issuing Visa for visiting Belgarath or any place in that country, so legally we can’t go there. If you are planning on getting to Belgarath through the nearby nations, sorry to inform you, they are not giving entry either. That nation is now isolated from the rest of the world just like Belgarath. No countries are willing to coperate with them.’ Dr. Amir said.

Col. Barnes looked at him with sadness in his eyes as he heard that his plan of returning to Belgarath was not going to happen anytime soon.

‘ What am I supposed to do, doctor? ‘. Jacob asked at last, breaking down in front of his friend.

‘ First of all, please shave your jungle and take a bath. Secondly, clean this room, oh god, it reeks. And thirdly, quit drinking. Destroying your liver will not get her back, colonel. You need to be sharp to make plans ahead and to find a way to go back. Am I right? ‘. Dr. Amir asked and colonel nodded his head.

‘ Wait for things to calm down . I am sure that one day, the two nations will be on good terms and then you can go back to explain your side of the story to her.’ Dr. Amir said and colonel Barnes just sat their silently.

‘I know you are so heart broken and depressed, but don’t do anything stupid, Jacob. ‘ Dr. Amir said as he had read the colonel's thoughts.

‘ How do.. ‘ Colonel Barnes asked, but was interrupted by the doctor.

‘ You are the man who decided to go back to her even when your life was at risk and from that I knew how much you loves that girl, colonel. So stay alive so you could go back to her when everything is over. I am sure, you guys would meet again. ‘ Dr. Amir said and that brought tears to the colonel’s eyes.

‘ Thank you, doc. ‘ Col. Barnes said.

‘ You are always welcome, my buddy. ‘ Dr. Amir said smiling at his friend.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

‘ Let’s go home, Fari. I am not feeling well. ‘ Tamina said looking uninterested.

‘ That’s why we are here, dear. To see a physician. ‘ Farah said as they were walking through the market place towards a local physician’s house.

‘ I am just tired, that’s all. There is no need to see a physician. ‘ Tamina complained reluctant to see a doctor. The market place was where she used to have good and happy memories, but now those had become painful and everytime she visit the market, it reminds her of colonel Barnes.

‘ Tamina, you fainted last day and vomited three times this week. You look so pale and weak. I know you are depressed, but you are not taking care of your health as you want to die. I am not allowing that. ‘ Farah said as she dragged Tamina towards the local physician’s house.

Tamina entered the room with a sour face. It was true that she felt tired and nauseous, but her heart was too weak to notice that. The local physician, an old man in his sixty's sat on a mat with his box containing acupuncture needles beside him on the floor. Both the girls sat opposite him on another mat. The man started examining Tamina by checking her pulses. After checking it once, he checked it again and again with a frown.

‘ Young lady, what were your symptoms again? ‘. He asked in his soft voice.

‘ She always look tired and feels very weak. This week she threw up almost three times and last day, she fainted in the kitchen. ‘ Farah answered for Tamina who sat there feeling tired. The local doctor looked at them and then sighed.

' Do you have your monthly bleeding? Is it regular?'. The physician asked.

'No, it's being late this month.' Tamina said in a confused tone.

‘ Are you married, kid?. ‘ He asked.

‘ No. ‘ Tamina said. The doctor's face darkened a shade and his face tightened as in dislike.

‘ You are almost four weeks pregnant, lady. ‘ The doctor said looking away from Tamina.

Tamina felt as she was struck by lightning and sat there speechless. Farah also turned into a stone next to her. The first one to recover from the paralysis was Farah. She tapped her cousin on her arms.

‘ Tami, are you ok.? ‘ Farah asked. There was no response.

‘ Thank you doctor. Here is your fees. ‘ Farah handed over the money to the doctor and exited the room with a half frozen Tamina. Farah then dragged her cousin to an isolated spot away from the crowd of the market place.

‘ Tami, talk to me. Please’. Farah pleaded her cousin.

Tamina raised her eyes from the ground and stared at Farah with her soulless eyes. Farah’s eyes welled up with tears. Suddenly Tamina broke down completely, hugging her cousin. She cried as she was lost and her pain and heart break for the past few weeks poured out from her heart.

‘Shhh… shhhh… . Calm down or you will faint again. Calm down. It’s ok. I am here'. Farah comforted her cousin who looked tired and frail.

‘ God will definitely show a way, Tami. Trust me. He will. ‘ Farah said hugging her cousin, while a lone tear escaped her eyes, worried for her best friend.