~ Present ~

As I sit legs hanging over the edge of the building I can't rid myself of the temptation to jump.

That would solve everything, wouldn't it?

It seems so easy, too easy that I don't even realise I'm standing now. Everyone's always like by killing yourself you let them win however with my thought process I want to make them suffer. I reach for my bag and start writing the notes that will reveal what they did to me the notes that will be the end of them. I wonder how they'll react to my notes it's sad that I won't be here to see it. People may think it's sad im dying at the age of 17 but I've lived a whole load of shitty lifetimes and im happy it is ending, this vicious cycle is finally coming to an end.

"Ava no"

The sudden voice rips all my thoughts away shit he followed me here didn't he

Stay calm. Stay calm

This can easily be explained right

"I was just looking at the view I wasn't gonna jump"

My voice sounds weak I hope he doesn't see right through me

He rushes towards me and engulfs me with his arms dragging me away from what would have been one of my last moments on earth .Its comforting but im not going to live just for him.

It's not enough It doesn't change what happened it doesn't change a thing.

He's just one piece in this big miserable puzzle which is my life.

I wonder how my death would effect him I wonder what his reaction will be

I'm evil im so horrifyingly evil i don't want to do this to him

I should leave him a note too I haven't written him one as of yet.

He at least deserves a goodbye and I want to give that to him.