9 9. Meeting

The cafe was cozy. It had large glass panes that let the sunlight in, and outside were several wooden tables decorated with flowers in the center.

Crossing the threshold of the cafe, I looked at its interior. All its decor was kept in light beige and white colors. On one of the walls, right next to the countertop, there was a board with a menu written in chalk. Plants were placed in many places, which gave the cafe an atmosphere of peace and relaxation. The tables were the same as outside, made of soft dark wood. In one of the further corners of the cafe, there were comfortable poufs in various pastel colors, and among them white wooden tables. It place looked like an art corner, where you could sit comfortably and read a book or sketch over good tea or coffee. And also, right next to them, by the wall, there were bookcases so that everyone could take one of the books and have a good time. It all looked very cozy and inviting, and until I wanted to sit there and indulge in a moment of oblivion there.

Going deeper into the café, you could also notice a few slightly darker places with tables. Oddly enough, although it was darker there, it had the same atmosphere as in other parts of the room, and at the same time gave privacy. It was an unusual combination and it was difficult to do.

I was impressed with this place, so only after a while, I noticed Samael sitting at one of the darkened tables, staring at me with something strange in his eyes that I could not guess.

I moved towards him slowly, trying to be indifferent.

Without saying hello to him, I sat on the other side of the table, putting one leg over the second and resting my back against the back of the chair. We sat in silence for a while, just looking at each other. This strange moment of silence was interrupted by the appearance of a mug of coffee on the table.

I looked my eyes away from Samael to see who had brought this coffee, but I saw no one. Shrugging, I reached for the cup and sniffed the contents. The smell was wonderful, I could smell not only coffee with milk but also cinnamon and vanilla. Also, the coffee had foam on top.

It was evident that the coffee had been prepared by a specialist. I tasted it carefully. Pure delight attacked my taste buds. I muttered quietly and took a few more sips of this miracle, squinting slightly in pleasure. Only after a while did I regain my composure and put the coffee back on the table, meeting Samael's slight smile.

I cleared my throat and was about to speak when the earlier aforementioned shapeshifter overtook me.

- It's going to be a full moon soon, will you come jogging with us in wolf form or at least stay with us during this time?

Only after a while, I realized the meaning of his words.

Why?

Well, it's all because of his voice, it had a strange effect on me. I wanted to listen to him over and over again, especially since I knew that this tone of his voice was aimed at me and only for me.

It was just bewitching.

I didn't need it in my life, it was a complication, but how attractive...

Shaking off the charm of his voice, slightly surprised and shocked by his proposal, I finally spoke, first moisturizing my slightly dry throat with a sip of my liquid coffee sky.

- Nope. You know I'm not changing. I disowned to my wolf and this part of my life. This question is stupid on your part, and although I don't know you well, I didn't think you were stupid before. What popped into your head? And moreover what's this situation with hiring me and saying you won't let me get away and then ignoring me and my existence? Don't you think you're contradicting yourself? What is it all about?

Having expelled what was tangling up my head, I took a deep breath several times, trying to calm down. And then I realized what I said.

What have I done?!

As soon as my own words reached me and the fact that I showed him my emotions, so strong, and I made him clear that his behavior somehow moved me, I felt like slapping my head.

I exploded, which usually didn't happen to me... I exploded and now I still have to look at him and his happy smile, relaxed posture, hands folded on his chest, and this kind of victorious gleam in his eye. Uh, someone please give me some hard wall so I can fix what's broken in my head. I groaned softly in frustration and failure, then slammed my hand across my forehead in a breakdown.

Okay, take it easy, good face to a bad game or something that. Ah, anyway, it doesn't matter.

I forced my mind and my body to relax and, seemingly full of nonchalance, shifted back in my chair leaning more against his backrest, and reached for my coffee.

- Just don't think yourself to something weird. I just don't like situations like this and that's it.

I said blandly, or at least I hoped it sounded like that.

- Oh, really? Of course, how would I dare to think of anything especially if there applies to you. It's not like you feel anything and that you care about something, including me.

Samael replied with some contrariness in his voice and a strange joy in his eyes, leaning a little towards me.

I frowned slightly and looked at him menacingly. Or at least I hoped that my gaze did contain horror and danger, and not just the look of an angry kitten who, instead of an atmosphere of terror, is actually cute in its own way...

- Don't play with me - I growled at him.

That bloody handsome wolf teased me ... I don't know if I wanted to scratch his mesmerizing eyes out now or if I doing something else. Something I was trying to push into the depths of my mind and something that included being very close to him, and it wasn't because I wanted to dismember him. But it doesn't matter, luckily that this 'something' wasn't specified yet, so it was easier for me not to think about it.

For the first time in a long time, anger began to take hold of me, strange and out of control. I think it was because Samael was threatening my world that he was threatening the wall that I had built around my mind. I guess that scared me.

Eh, I really don't want too many things in my life.

All I wanted was peace, silence, and no feelings. I just wanted to be a doll, a doll that cannot be hurt, that does not feel, doesn't despair, and is not hurt because she cannot be hurt. It's not much, so why did Samael have to come into my life trying to destroy everything?

The anger at him was tearing me apart from the inside, and for this one time, I let this feeling come out on top. Just this one time, I told myself and then exploded.

- That's enough! I don't know what game you're playing, but I'm fed up! Stop it! Can't you just leave me alone? You have to turn my life upside down and torment me?! You are like some goddamn storm that comes out appears suddenly and destroys everything! A storm that can only be waited out and that don't want to go away!

I uncontrollably screamed at Samael, and my whole body was shaking. I was gasping for air to my mouth like a fish devoid of life-giving water.

I don't even know when I got up from my chair and leaned toward him, resting my hands on the table, staring at him furiously. I felt something wet on my cheek, but I didn't pay attention to it. After all, it can't be a tear, I'm never crying, so probably something fell on me.

Samael was looking at me with strange thoughtful eyes as if scanning me, looking for something, or maybe confirming something? I don't know.

A rage was buzzing inside me that wouldn't let me think logically nor for anything else, such as analyzing this situation. Then Samael suddenly got up and now it was he who towered over me. I took my hands off the table and straightened up, staring at him defiantly. Meanwhile, he was leaning towards me, only millimeters separating our faces.

After a while, the man spoke to me in a low, deep voice making my body tremble, which was caused by a feeling completely different than anger.

- Life is not about waiting out the storm, it's about learning to dance in the rain.

I didn't even have time to be shocked by his statement, as he gave me a hard look and kiss my mouth, which was slightly ajar. Next, he put one hand on the back of my neck, pulling me closer. I do not know what I was thinking then or whether I was thinking at all.

I did another stupid thing that day and gave in to that kiss.

He was dominant, not allowing to objection, and very exciting. For a while, our tongues fought each other for dominance, but for me, it was a lost fight. It wasn't an ordinary kiss, no, he expressing a desire to possess, he was wild and untamed, like the very essence of wolves. It was only when we ran out of air that Samael broke the kiss at the end, lightly kissing me on the lips as I was panting heavily with my eyes wide open.

Before I could shake off this all off and speak something, Samael gently stroked my cheek and walked away, and I, unable to make a single sound from myself, fell heavily on the chair trying to get rid of the shock and problem in my pants.

I don't know how much I was sitting there motionless with a completely dead and bewildered mind, but when I reached for my coffee it turned out to be already cold, so probably half an hour has passed.

If it hadn't been for my automatic defense system, it might have been the end of the world before I could get over this whole thing in my mind... With this whole situation with Samael that just happened.

I have a rather specific mind. When something saddens me, makes me wonder so much that I can't find peace or it just destroys me and makes my feelings swirl or confuse me, then first I experience it like a normal person, and then I just cut myself off from it. My mind pushes what disturbed his peace into a dark corner and forgets, just erases it. Thanks to this, I can return to the mental state before the event or feeling. It is happening without my participation. Automatically. I'm not going to lie to say that I don't want it. After all, I like it a lot, although sometimes it can be annoying because I have the feeling that I am emotionally on the level of a robot or a doll... The doll I would want to become... But if I want to become it, why should I mind that it slowly I become like her?

Sometimes... Okay, yeah really it's almost always, I don't understand myself. I could use an instruction manual. They should hand it to me at birth. Its title would be like this: "How To Handle with Gabriel - An Emotionally Non-Functional Broken Shapeshifter" Yeah, that would be very helpful. Unfortunately, I don't have such instruction and I have to alone agonize with myself.

Thinking about everything and nothing, and completely forgetting what was in happened the cafe, I got home.