32 Having someone who understands makes all the difference in the world

Everything feels so warm and soft.

After everything that happened yesterday, waking up feels like an absolute chore. My body feels heavy, like it's made out of lead. The prospect of going outside sounds like torture. The idea of having to interact with people is already sapping the nonexistent energy from my already tired body.

It reminds me of the times when I would fake being sick to skip school because I don't feel like it. Making up an excuse such as a headache, heating the thermometer using my study light, faking a cough here and there, and I got myself an entire day to spend in the comfort of my house alone, free to do whatever I wanted. And of course, video games are the natural first choice.

Ah, the good old times when games were actually good and not some half-assed, bug-ridden, live service bullshit that the majority are today.

'Hmm, so comfy.'

It would be nice to just sleep the day away.

Unfortunately, my internal clock says otherwise.

Slowly opening my bleary eyes, I look around the room, taking stock of my surroundings. The first thing I noticed was the lack of clothing covering my upper body. Sitting up on the bed, I can see that the black undershirt is neatly folded and placed on top of my bag close to the nightstand, while the jinbei, I realize, is tied around my waist.

Turning my sight towards the left side of the bed, I can see the unconscious figure of Lumine and Paimon. The fact that she's physically here probably means that she fell asleep right after she finished eating.

'Or maybe she just likes to sleep in the real world every once in a while.'

Lumine, meanwhile, is wearing something other than her usual clothes.

Covering the sleeping figure of the traveler is a short-sleeved white nightgown going all the way to her feet, with a frill on the gown's collar and sleeves. The nightgown itself seems a size larger than it should have, probably an intentional choice on her part.

'I miss wearing baggy clothes.'

Now wide awake with no chance of going back to sleep, I carefully extricate my left hand from Lumine's hold and make my way to the bathroom to wash my face.

Scooping some water from the bucket with my hand, I splash them onto my face. Feeling the water's already low temperature amplified by the cold air of the early morning, any semblance of sleep left in me is gone.

Exiting the bathroom, I grab my undershirt and make my way towards the mirror located above the dresser close to the nightstand.

Looking at the reflection staring back at me, I was once again reminded of the fact that I am no longer the person that I was in terms of appearance.

Though it should've been obvious, yesterday's event made that fact painfully clear.

The long black hair styled in a side part is gone, replaced with a messy indigo bob cut. The familiar drooping brown eyes are now replaced by a deceptively soft indigo, hiding the sharpness within.

And the most noticeable difference being the lack of a certain horizontal cut running through the front side of my neck.

Bringing my hand closer to the no longer scarred area, I run my fingers on the now unblemished skin, marveling at the contrasting sensation of what I'm feeling now and what I remembered it being.

'It feels… strange, now that I remembered what happened.'

Suddenly, an itching sensation starts to form from there.

It started small, like that itch you got from being bitten by a mosquito. Despite scratching it for quite some time, it never stops. Instead, it got a lot worse. On top of that, I suddenly find it hard to breathe.

"Cough, cough!"

Desperately trying to take a breath while trying to make the itching sensation disappear, I glance at my reflection in the mirror, only to see the old me, hunched over the dresser, desperately clawing at his neck trying to stop the blood from coming out.

"Cough!"

I felt myself tuning out the outside world, not being able to focus on anything other than what's happening in front of me. Seeing the fresh wound on his neck reminded me of the cold sensation of the knife pressing against my throat.

Before I could lose myself even further, there was a sudden pull from behind. With the mirror no longer in front of me, the world slowly came back to focus. The ringing in my ears started to fade away, until eventually, a familiar call of a familiar voice came through.

"Yuu?! Are you okay?!"

Seeing the panicked look in Lumine's eyes, I was about to answer when another painful cough made its way into my throat.

"Cough, cough! I'm… fine. I think."

Ignoring the disbelief written all over her face, I tried to stand up, only to fall midway through. Thankfully, Lumine was able to catch me before I hit the floor. Feeling myself being pulled further back, I didn't put up any resistance and let her carry me towards the bed.

The moment I was dropped into the bed, she sat in front of me, grabbing both of my hands and holding them close to her. Feeling the soft sheets and the warmth enveloping my hands, the itching sensation slowly died down.

"What happened? You were staring at the mirror for quite some time."

At the reminder of what just transpired, I instinctively tried to scratch my neck, only for the grip in my hand to tighten, stopping me from doing so.

"Raise your head a bit." Unable to resist the pleading look she directed at me, I did what she asked. Bringing herself closer, she inspected my condition a bit before moving away. "There doesn't seem to be anything wrong. Not a single visible mark left either. Does it still hurt?"

"It was more of an itch than pain, but no, it doesn't. Not anymore, at least."

"I see. That's good." Although she let out a sigh of relief, I can see that she's still worried about me. "How is your breathing? Any problems? You looked like you were having trouble before."

"None." Taking several deep breaths, I slowly inhale and exhale to show her that I'm fine. "See? No problem at all."

Nodding her head in response, she released my hands before pulling me down towards the bed. Falling short of meeting her head, I ended up laying my head on top of her chest.

Combine my newfound fatigue with the soft pillow-like sensation, I unconsciously let out a tired sigh.

"Fufu, it tickles."

"Huh?" Realizing what I had just done, I looked up but was not met with anger, only a hint of a smirk forming on the edge of her lips. Nevertheless….

"Sorry. Should I move?"

"Oh no, it's fine. I just didn't expect that from you."

"I mean, you're the one who pulled me down, so…."

"True." Letting out a small laugh, she simply ruffled my hair in response. To her side, I can hear the light snore coming from our resident fairy. Despite the commotion, she's still sleeping like a log.

"You're not going to ask?"

Humming in thought, it took a while for her to respond. "Do you want me to?"

"I mean, I don't really mind…?"

"Is that a question, or a statement?"

Hearing the seriousness in her voice caught me off guard. Suddenly, she grabbed my waist and gently rolled the two of us to the side, careful to not crush Paimon under my weight.

Lifting me from under my arms, my face is now close to hers, our noses touching. I can feel the warm breath coming from her.

"Yuu, is that what you really want?"

"What do you mean?"

"You not minding if I ask about what happened. Is that what you really want, or is that what you think I would want? There's a difference."

"Uhh…."

"Listen, Yuu." Cupping my face with her hands, she grazed the edge of my lips while nuzzling our noses together. "Think about it for a bit, okay? Do you really not mind explaining what happened? Would you be comfortable with that? Are you sure you're not doing it because you feel like you have to?"

At the end of it, her voice became so soft I wouldn't have heard her if I wasn't this close to her mouth.

'Is she scared? But why would she… oh. Right.'

After all, I ended up being out of it for hours after telling her everything. Though I don't think she's at fault, she probably didn't see it that way.

In an effort to reassure her, I closed our distance, capturing her lips in mine. The familiar softness from the contact made my body shiver in delight.

The sudden intimacy caught her off guard, with her letting out a surprised yelp, though it didn't take long for her to reciprocate the kiss.

Feeling her tongue brushing at my lips, I slowly opened my mouth, which she took advantage of immediately.

Pushing herself closer, I can feel the warm appendage exploring my mouth, occasionally intertwining with my own. Grabbing a fistful of her blonde hair, she groped and rubbed my sides and back in return.

Eventually, both of us ran out of breath and had to pull apart. Her cheeks were flushed as she panted for breath, though I imagine my expression is not that different from hers right now.

After calming myself down a bit, I spoke first.

"Don't blame yourself for what happened yesterday. You couldn't have known. Hell, I certainly don't either."

"…what do you mean?"

"I don't remember much of what happened to me before I came to this world. But what happened yesterday answers that question."

"You know that doesn't make me feel better about it, right?"

"Look, the point is," giving a slight pinch on her cheek, she merely giggled in response, "I don't blame you, so you shouldn't either."

"…really?"

"Really."

Carefully looking at my expression, she looked for any sign of deceit, before nodding her head in relief when she found none.

"And… you're right, I suppose. Perhaps, I'm guilty for constantly compromising for your sake."

Smiling at my answer, she nodded her head, encouraging me to continue.

"I was afraid that you'd hate me if I didn't give you an answer straight away. Or rather, afraid that you'd think I didn't trust you enough to do so."

"Of course I wouldn't think that, you dummy." Giving me a pout, she flicked my forehead in annoyance, though there was no real strength behind it.

Finding her gesture adorable, I couldn't help but smile. "I know, I know. It's just my fear and anxiety rearing its ugly head again."

"Then I'll be sure to squash them everytime they do."

"Haha, I'll be relying on you then, Lumine."

"Oh? What happened to calling me princess, hmm?"

"Well, now that I think about it, it was kind of an arbitrary action on my part, so I thought–"

Placing her index finger on my mouth, she stopped me from my rambling. "Shush. I don't really mind, so you can keep calling me that, you know?"

"...as you wish, princess."

"That's more like it."

With nothing more to add, the two of us fell into a comfortable silence. Grabbing hold of the blanket, I brought it closer and covered the two of us with it. Hearing a hum of approval coming from the traveler, I feel her snuggling into me, making the warmth under the blanket amplified even further.

"Think you're up for today?"

"What's happening today?"

"You know, the meeting in the knights headquarters?"

"Ah. Of course. No way in hell am I missing out on my payment."

"Fufu." Grabbing hold of my face, she gave me a short chaste kiss before pulling away. "Never change, Yuu. Never change."

"I thought you wanted me to."

"You know what I mean!"