His Long, Lonely Journey

Airi: "Hana, you've returned. I genuinely feel happy for Jun."

Hana raised an eyebrow, saying, "...I don't think he's all that pleased."

Airi was taken aback, asking, "What are you talking about? Seeing you must've made him the happiest."

Just as Airi couldn't understand Hana's response, Hana couldn't grasp what Airi meant either. As far as she could tell, Jun didn't show any signs of excitement or happiness these past few days since her reappearance.

So she rubbed her temples, sounding somewhat frustrated. "We dated for a year, and were married for another, so all in all, we were together for just two years. But we've been apart for forty years. I think he might've gotten over me long ago. I guess my sudden return would surprise and perhaps scare him more than it would delight him. Anyone else would probably find my reappearance bothersome. But Jun has always been responsible, even in his younger days. He hasn't changed, which is why he came to pick me up. It's just his character."

Airi exhaled and shot back, "What are you saying? Don't you know how much he loved you?"

Hana leaned back in her chair, unsure, "He might've loved me back then. But after all these years? Remembering me might just be because he has a good memory. It doesn't mean he still has feelings for me."

Airi looked at her and suddenly asked, "Did Jun not tell you anything?"

Hana felt a sudden jolt in her heart. "Tell me what?"

Airi sighed, activated her PT, tapped on it a few times, and then showed it to Hana, "Look at this. This is the biggest missing persons website. It was created by the police when the big data network was first established. The missing persons info on it gets updated every year. Since this site was launched, your details have always been on it and have remained there for years. Posting info here requires an annual fee. Many give up after searching for a year or two and remove the info. But Jun has always insisted on keeping your info up and has been paying the fee every year. Do you know what this means?"

It means that even after forty years, Jun was still waiting for her to return.

Even when everyone else believed she was dead after forty years, he still held onto hope.

Hana stared at her photo on the website, completely dumbfounded.

"He... Jun has been searching for me all these years?" Hana asked in disbelief.

Seeing her like this, Airi felt deeply saddened, especially for the long-separated couple. "Of course! The reason why the service center staff contacted Jun so quickly after you waited for a short while is precisely because your details were on this website, allowing them to identify you swiftly."

Airi said, "When you disappeared all those years ago without a trace, Jun reached out to everyone you knew, trying to get any information on you. He filed a report with the police, asked his family and all his friends to keep an eye out for any news about you. You can't imagine, but he must have walked every street and alley near your home countless times, searching for you. He was supposed to be preparing for an exam with his professor, but after you went missing, he never returned to school."

Airi recalled a gaunt and devastated Jun from those days, a phrase like 'skin and bones' couldn't even begin to describe him. She and her then-boyfriend were so concerned that they frequently visited him, asking if there were any updates about Hana. One day, they found Jun passed out at his front door, the key still in the lock but the door unopened.

They rushed Jun to the hospital. When he woke up, he broke down, crying uncontrollably. By that time, Hana had been missing for over three months. In his distress, Jun asked them, "What if Hana is dead? What if she met a killer and got murdered, and her body is hidden somewhere we can't find?"

Airi remembered thinking at that moment that if Jun continued like this, he wouldn't be able to handle it.

However, as time went on, he seemed to recover somewhat. Although he still searched tirelessly for Hana, he wasn't as despondent as before. A year later, he returned to school to resume his studies. Airi thought he was alright, only to later discover that Jun's anxiety hadn't subsided. He took various medications to cope, almost ruining his health in the process.

"Do you remember those news reports back then about several women being harmed? Jun said he was afraid you'd suffer the same fate. He had severe anxiety symptoms those years."

Hana had imagined that her sudden disappearance would hurt Jun, but she had no idea the extent of the pain she had caused him.

"And... what happened after?" Hana whispered.

Airi paused for a moment, "For a while, I lost touch with him. After he finished his PhD, he went to teach in rural villages and overseas for about ten years. He visited many remote places. We all thought he was doing it to relax and take his mind off things. It was only when he returned and invited us out for dinner that he shared the real reason."

"He said one day he saw news about gangsters abducting young women and selling them to remote villages or even overseas. He had several nightmares, dreaming that you had been kidnapped by traffickers, trapped in a dark room with no one coming to rescue you. So, when he saw an opportunity to volunteer for teaching assignments in remote places through his school, he signed up on a whim. Even his professor couldn't dissuade him."

When Jun returned from teaching in those villages for several years and invited them out for dinner, Airi almost didn't recognize him. He was much darker and thinner, his face showing the wear of years, yet the only comforting thing was that he seemed much more spirited, laughing and talking like his old self.

"All these years, I've been to many places, always thinking: What if I really find her in one of those places? And if I don't, what then?" The expression Jun had when he said this left a deep impression on Airi.

By that time, Hana had been missing for over a decade. At that moment, Airi felt a tinge of guilt. While she still thought of her dear friend, her own life had moved on with a husband, children, and family, which had diluted her longing and concern for Hana. Everyone seemed to have moved on with their new lives, except Jun, who remained consumed by his memories and his longing.

Bit by bit, Airi narrated everything she knew about Jun over the years. Through her detailed account, Hana perceived the shadow of loneliness that spanned those forty years. He seemed like a lone red-crowned crane, migrating from south to north, through changing seasons, always by himself.

A profound sense of sorrow and pain, seemingly from nowhere, grasped at Hana's heart, making her feel as if it was constricting, like a sharp pinch.

"Didn't he ever find someone else?" Hana murmured.

Airi shook her head.

Hana recalled the thought she had when she walked through the door the day before. She assumed that after all these years, Jun must have remarried, maybe even had children. Only now did she realize that Jun was even more steadfast than she had imagined.

Tears welled up in Hana's eyes, flowing uncontrollably. She wasn't the type to cry easily. When she was a teenager, she once believed in "shedding blood but not tears." As she grew older, she became more laid-back, living each day as it came, with her main focus being on her own happiness. She rarely cried. But now, the tears wouldn't stop. It felt as if she wasn't crying for herself, but for that man who journeyed alone from his youth into old age.

Airi sat beside her, handing her a tissue to wipe away her tears and taking one for herself. Though the elderly Airi had stopped crying, Hana continued.

"Hana Chan, please don't cry," Airi lamented, seeing Hana's eyes swollen. "Take a moment, okay?" Despite her pleas, Hana couldn't contain her tears, leaving Airi feeling deeply distressed.

"Don't cry anymore. Isn't everything fine now? You're back. From now on, everything will be alright," Airi consoled.

Hana covered her mouth and closed her eyes, but even so, tears kept streaming down her face. Thinking about Jun's feelings all those years ago, she felt something inside her tearing apart, as bitterness seeped through the gaps.

When they returned home, Jun was startled by Hana's swollen, red eyes. Surprised, he asked, "What happened? Why have you been crying so much?"

"Ah, sit down first. I'll get you a towel to wipe your eyes," he said, quickly wetting a towel and bringing it over, cool and damp, for Hana to place over her eyes.

Hana had calmed down, but seeing Jun again stirred emotions inside her.

Jun motioned for them to sit and brought over some honey water. With a tone of deep concern, he said, "It's not good for your health to have such extreme emotions all at once. It's okay to let it out, but you can't remain this upset. Adjust your mindset, and things will get better. If you're not used to today's society, we'll all be here to help. Don't worry too much."

His voice was gentle, filled with care and concern.

Hana held the cold towel, looking intently at him, wondering, Is this calm demeanor genuine?

Of the two of them, during this bizarre unexpected time-traveling experience, the hardest part for Jun was when she vanished, leaving him to cope on his own. For her, the most painful time is now, grappling with the forty-year gap, seeing loved ones suddenly aged. Yet, she wasn't alone; since Jun brought her back, he's been gently helping her adjust to this new world and to him, trying not to add any stress.

Hana saw his attentive care in Jun's intertwined hands.

That afternoon, Hana remained quiet. In the evening, Airi and her husband Hiroshi stayed at a nearby hotel, as suggested by Airi. Hana didn't object. Only she and Jun remained at home.

Jun was looking at the instruction manual, trying to set up the game she bought on the TV screen. He even placed the game controller next to Hana, but she didn't touch it.

When Jun got up to cook, Hana followed him, watching him rinse the rice in the kitchen.

"Jun," Hana said, standing at the kitchen doorway, "isn't it painful to wait for someone for so many years?"

Jun paused in washing the rice, looking back at Hana in mild surprise. He then smiled gently, shaking his head. His warm eyes shone with a gentle light as he said, "No matter what, one can get used to anything."

Hana stared at him, "I thought you wouldn't be happy because of my sudden appearance, but Airi said you were. Is that true?"