50 Big events

Since I last talked two major events have occurred, Orochimaru's death to sasuke which means that I no longer have to worry about that pedophile because I killed Kabuto previously. Honestly I practically gifted the guy to sasuke with how I changed the time line.

Orochimaru possessed a guy called Gen'yūmaru after he ran away from tsunade in both timelines. However in mine he didn't have Kabuto to assist him when the hosts body began rejecting Orochimaru which made him bedridden. Without the extra help his body was even weaker than usual so sasuke easily killed him.

The issue with Orochimaru was that he was a roach who had numerous ways to survive. Fortunately I knew them, the curse mark resurrection technique and the living corpse reanimation technique are his main ones. Should he fail to take a body and die Orochimaru would then hop towards a curse mark that contained a piece of his soul.

There was also reconstituting himself from a large gathering of his cells but Kabuto never underwent that transformation therefore he would never come back this way. The spies that had seeped into the hidden sound confirmed Orochimaru never took another assistant.

He would either possess that body or reform out of the mark using numerous other methods. So I simply removed the marks from the equation over the span of three years. The two he developed which were the cursed seals of heaven and earth held two different purposes. The first which was heaven was for conditioning bodies with senjutsu so Orochimaru could possess them or revive through them. The second one (earth) was for those with kekkei genkai that he wanted to take in the future like kimimaro and tayuya.

So I spoke to mama cloth who was more than happy to help destroy the last remnants of Manda's contractor. Guiness was also willing to help when I mentioned that Manda had a son which is technically true as Orochimaru clones one for sasuke in canon.

So they went to ryuchi cave to ask for "an explanation" about it and they revealed the inner workings of the curse mark that harness their nature energy technique. So after getting tayuya and Karin over there to analyse it we created a cursed radar detector. It picks up on Orochimaru's senjutsu that he was able to harness, he never achieved sage mode because his body was lacking.

After that we mass produced them and went people out to each of the lands in groups hunting the marks down. After three years 113 curse mark users were found. They even had two in konoha besides tayuya, Karin and anko who were root agents. So we had those two killed and interrogated under the pretense of working with Orochimaru. Danzo tried to gave that stopped but his old allies stepped in and blocked him politically.

They had their little battle for the leaf in the dark as per usual not even realising that the horny monkey sage had begun looking into the three of them. After becoming a sage and hornier he began to have a little personality change. No paperwork to restrict him and no politics to put him on guard let him revert to the man who participated in multiple wars. Those three are toast once he finishes his little secret training.

How did I find out about it? The wolves of course, Emma brags about hiruzen to his people and monkeys love to gossip. The wolves have super hearing so they pick up intel using that method. Not many realise the politics among summons and how much those guys learn through the years. Every village had at least one animal scroll which would be used in the dangerous missions or for delivering intel.

The animals gather it for themselves in case of a rainy day, the wolves don't care so they spread it to me. I've essentially got an information network rivalling jiraiyas though mine is equivalent to a zoo. Best part is my network doesn't require me breezing into every whore house in the world racking up STD's, tsunade was very open about that when she was drunk. I choked on my wine when she told me "those warts aren't from the toads".

Anyway essentially orochimaru can only come back through sasuke now. On to the second event is that jiraiya has been murdered by pain, he infiltrated akatsuki in Amegakure where he was impaled by the black rods.

I was called in with naruto when his teachers death was revealed incase the fox escaped. It didn't happen, he just deflated and left after throwing a tantrum. Tsunade asked shikamaru to speak with him as he's the closest to naruto in the year group.

Meanwhile I spoke with ma and pa, it was about the numbers on their back. "Any clue what these are about toriko-bouya". I held my chin and processed then replied already knowing the answer "off the top of my head I think they're something to do with Jiraiya's books." The others all looked at me and asked me to continue.

"I know that jiraiya was tasked with managing Konoha's spy network so he had to relay the info he gathered some way. That method was the release of his books, though perverted the information made its way into the hands of every male in konoha." The women in the room didn't like that so I changed the subject.

"The numbers could be chapters, paragraphs, page lines, words and maybe photos or something. You'll have to read every one of his novels and follow the code assuming what I said was the case".

Kakashi stood up dramatically "I was born for this" tsunade then looked at him "I know for a fact you were an accident now sit down, the code cracker team will be able to do this much faster than you can". He looked insulted towards her entire sentence and then his pupil shrunk "is that a challenge?" "It's not" "a challenge it is". He then vanished to what I assume is to jack off for multiple days under the pretense of doing his job.

I wish that shit would have worked in my past life, I would have made so much money as a teenager it wouldn't have been funny. Anyway Naruto got cheered up after reading the message then used the new found motivation to perfect the rasen shuriken so it wouldn't hurt him.

Yeah canon naruto got to fight Hidan and kakuzu but mine didn't. Tsunade had the jutsu tested by pakura who pointed out all the flaws expertly. Now he left to learn sage mode under the toads. He somehow learned that me, Kurenai and anko can do it. She learned over the 3 years. Tsunade also plans to do it shortly once the threat has passed.

Once kakashi comes out of his hyperbolic masturbation chamber he may end up becoming the next hokage. Danzo is a little preoccupied to be aiming for the seat like in canon right now. So when pain attacks I may go after his head myself.

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