2 My Rebirth

Apparently, from what I'd been told much later on, I was born with a scowl. I like to think this was because I was still reacting to the end of my conversation with the goddess.

My consciousness thankfully came into being after the birthing. I think there are some experiences no one should ever have to remember.

At first, the world was blurry, a mix of colours and shades. I could feel my impossibly small self being passed around and then... SLAP. Someone hit my butt and the world grew into focus.

Rude.

The woman holding me was in a maid's uniform. I surmised that she worked here. This lady was walking on some thin ice, some might interpret her actions as sexual harassment.

She grimaced. "The baby's not crying."

Catching on, I attempted to cry. It was unconvincing and half-hearted. My own voice creeped me out too much so I quickly stopped. I had always thought that newborns sounded a bit like raptors. The maid gave a tired smile. "Congratulations Countess! It's a healthy baby girl!"

I was handed delicately to a woman in the center of a massive four-poster bed.

She was beautiful, but worn and sweaty. There was a surprising exoticism to her. It was her long brown-black curly hair and almond-shaped eyes that set her apart from the other people in the room who all had more typical Western-European features. She looked at me with an empty expression. "She's uglier than Eden was when he was born."

Rude!

"Young Master Eden was unusually well-formed for a newborn, I assure you she will grow up to be a beauty," the maid insisted.

"I hope for her sake, not too beautiful," there was a hint of despair in her voice that concerned me.

She handed me back to the maid without another glance. "I think I will rest now."

"Of course my lady," The maid bowed while holding me securely to her chest. Two other servants drew the bed's canopy closed. My new mother was then hidden behind the drapes but I swear that I could hear a soft weeping from inside.

My chest twist. I felt like this was a more complex family situation that I was born into than I had bargained for.

I was then taken to a massive room in another wing of the surprisingly large house. Through the dark of night, it was hard to take in any of the room's details but I assumed it was my nursery. There had been an ornate wooden crib waiting for me afterall.

"The Countess was just tired," the maid said to me. "You didn't want to come out easily. Don't be too offended. I'm sure when the Earl returns to the manor, you will get a name."

That was all she said before leaving the room and shutting the doors. Then, just like that, I was alone.

The reality of this new life finally set in. A loneliness and sense of loss unlike anything I had ever felt before engulfed me that night. I had less faculty over my newborn body than I did of even my old one in my last days. It was like escaping one hell to enter another but now my support network of friends and clients no longer existed. Worse, my mom was gone forever, left alone in a place too far away now for me to even fathom.

I was a little relieved this body's mother seemed to have no interest in me. I wasn't ready yet to replace my real mom in my heart: The one that headed the parent council of my elementary school and drove me to and from all of my gymnastics practices. The mom that stayed by me when I got sick and weathered through my subsequent mood swings. My poor mom, whose howls of grief and fear were the last thing I had heard before I died.

As I reflected back on everything I'd left behind, the inhuman wail of a day-old baby echoed through the halls the manor that night.

My first months were not easy. They kept me indoors always and there seemed to never be a reason to take me outside of the nursery. I passed most of the time wriggling, tiring myself out, and then sleeping.

The maid who had delivered me, a burly woman with bushy brown hair tucked under a bonnet was apparently my wet nurse. She was at her core, a good person but she was very brisk and a bit too professional. I was not exposed to a lot of warmth.

Apparently, my father had come in at some unknown point but I had missed seeing him because I had been asleep. I wondered what he was like, what he looked like. Who would I take after? It was weird to have no idea what you look like.

It was a typical morning at the manor when an unfamiliar face popped over my crib. "Hello baby!" A young boy said, leaning on the rail eagerly. It was the first person I had seen in this world with such a gentle smile.

"Young Master Eden!" I could hear my nanny exclaim. "You get out of the nursery this instant!"

"But I wanted to see my sister!" He exclaimed.

Sister? I looked at the boy closely. I remembered my mother mentioning Eden on the day I was born. I had been an only child in my past life so I was intrigued at the prospects of a sibling.

"Your parents have already told you time and time again that you'll have to wait until she's a little older! She's too fragile for such a young boy to play around with!"

"But Velma..." he whined.

Velma: I made a mental note. all of these months and I still hadn't known her name.

"Out," she said firmly.

He started to leave, and I found myself wishing he'd stay. "A!" I called. "A Da!" I tried again. Unfortunately, the 'd' in Eden was the only part my baby mouth could pronounce.

"See, Briar wants me here, she's calling my name!" He argued.

"I highly doubt that," Velma said.

Eden muttered a little as he left the room.

He was the first person I had felt a connection towards here, so I was sad to see him go. He was really cute too, probably about four with a mop of sandy brown hair. I hoped my eyes were as blue as his, or at least as kind. Of course, there was something both enchanting and haunting about those dark forest-green eyes of my mother... they wouldn't be so bad either. I bet they looked beautiful when she smiled... if she ever smiled.

I thought back to the name Eden had called me, Briar. It was pretty. I quite liked it.

I tried to not think about Earth that much after that point.

I focused on learning movement and speech. Although my lives have been tragedies stacked on tragedies, I wasn't much of the wallow-in-self-pity-type. By my efforts, just a little before I was one, I managed to start walking. From that moment on, the world expanded.

I was probably a nightmare for Velma. Old coaches had always called me Kamikaze as a kid for how I'd throw myself around with reckless abandon no matter what sport I was trying. New body, same spirit. As soon as I could tumble a few steps forward, I threw myself into trying to run. My movements had the same lack of control as a person run-falling down a steep hill but it was exhilarating to be able to move freely and be building up strength and muscle rather than losing it.

It was the first time in years that I felt like me again. The me I was before I was sick.

A couple days of practice in, I waited for Velma to turn her back and I DASHED out of the nursery. My chest soared in elation at my successful jailbreak.

I was on a one-track path to finding Eden.

He had been sitting in a room down the hall and gasped with shock as I barreled into him. I hadn't figured out how to stop yet without crashing.

"Hey Briar," he said warmly, "Did you come looking for me?"

"Eda!" I said in delight.

He wrapped his arms around me and inhaled that soft baby scent of my hair. "I haven't seen you in a long time. Do you remember me?"

"Young lady!" Velma called in outrage as she raced over to us. "What on Earthia's green plains has possessed you?!"

"Are you really taking her back to that room?" My brother asked in disappointment.

"Of course!" She scoffed.

"But she's so much bigger now! Can't she walk around for a bit? I could show her the estate!" He begged.

Velma shook her head, "I have far too many chores to spend the day chasing her around outside the nursery. This girl is like an untrained dog, if you let her go for even a moment she'll bolt."

"I'll watch her! I promise I'll be gentle, and we won't go near the stairs!" He insisted.

"Alright," Velma sighed. "Never tell anyone she was let out of the nursery before her first birthday, I'll be the one in trouble. Many think it's bad luck."

Eden grinned and took my hand, "Come on Briar! I'll show you my room!"

"Have her back soon for her afternoon nap," Velma ordered as she left.

We walked around a large bedroom. It was well built and beautiful for sure, but it didn't fit a young child. It was too adult, but maybe that's just how things were in this world. Practical. Even my room didn't really have many toys. I had originally chalked it up to my obvious disinterest.

Were all noble houses like this? I couldn't decide if this was just a cultural thing in this new world or if Eden and I were being severely neglected.

I tugged at his hand, anxious to see out the window. "Do you want to see outside?" He asked.

"Da!" I agreed.

He led me to the window and lifted me high enough to see above the sill.

It was a breathtaking estate. It looked like some of the old manors I had once toured on a vacation to England.

I couldn't believe I hadn't been outside yet. I splat my hand against the window and slapped my clumsy baby palm against it a few times to relay the message.

"We can go out there after your birthday, It's coming soon!" He promised, placing my feet back down on the ground.

I guess I should have just been happy to be out of the nursery.

We walked around a little more, I got tired really fast but tried to make the most of this rare opportunity to work on my mobility. I just had to think about it as a really intense workout and it helped me push through.

"So in our family, it's me, you, mother and father," he told me out of the blue."But mother and father are often busy," the next part was said barely above a whisper, "I'm glad you're here now, it's been so boring all on my own."

I couldn't talk yet, but I squeezed his pinky to convey my message as best I could.

It sounds weird to say since he was older than me but I promised right then and there to take care of this precious little bean of a boy.

He was the first connection tethering me to this world and this new life and he'd never understand how grateful I was.