186 The truth

Colm 

I am stupid. 

So fucking stupid. 

I should have just told him the truth. The whole truth and nothing but the truth. Why I am so invested in him. I should have told him that he is my mate because now that I am sure, I don't ever want to let him go. It seems like he doesn't know. How is that even possible? 

We are supposed to feel it at the same time. 

Aren't we?

"Stop staring at me,'' he breathes out even though his eyes are closed. The sun is out now and even though I am usually awake by now and out for a run, I am scared to leave him alone because I know he will leave. I don't want him to leave my room. If I could keep him chained for the rest of our lives, I would. If that would keep him with me. I know I am being ridiculous but I have never wanted anyone as much as I want him. 

"I am not staring,'' I lie. 

He kissed me last night.