Colin
"You are in your head again,'' he says, calling me out on it. Somehow, tonight took a turn, and now i can't stop thinking about all the things that happened and all the things he said.
He threatened to hurt his friend for walking in on us, and yeah, I am still a little bit embarrassed, but saying you would hurt him because of that is kind of scary. I know what they say about him, but I don't believe them. They are all rumours, rumours that might be true or not. Until I got the facts, I didn't want to judge him.
"I am here," I say as I sit up on the bed.
He raises his eyebrows in disbelief.
"You are thinking about what I said, aren't you?''
I shake my head, "No, what did you say?"
He scoffs, "Do you want to go back to your room?'' he asks, but I watch as he slides closer to me until his face is just an inch away from mine.
I close my eyes because I need to get control of my heart and its erratic response to this magnificent man in front of me. When I open my eyes, he is still watching me with a smirk on his face. He knows without even an answer from me. I don't want to leave, I just have a couple of days left with him and going will just make me regret my decision.
"You don't have to hurt him if he says anything to anyone, I am okay with it," I spoke up because I wanted to go back to before that man walked in on us.
"He won't say anything. I have no doubt in my mind. "
"Okay. "
His hand snaked around my waist and I let him pull me closer until I was on top of him. His blue eyes pierce through my soul and I shiver as he brushes his fingers against my lower back. "You think too much. Can you stop doing that when you are with me,'' he whispers as his hot breath brushes against me?
"Not thinking? I don't think I can, that's a character flaw I have.''
He raises a brow. "Nothing about you is flawed, you are fucking perfect." His tone is firm that I almost believe his words. I want to actually think that way about myself, but I know who I am. I know who I have always been. Growing up with a brother that got along with everyone, growing up around strong-minded people, and being a shy kid, just showed me how flawed I am.
I don't like to think about that because my dads always let me know that everyone is different and the things that I think are weaknesses end up being my strengths, but I still haven't seen it. I still don't know what is special about me. I am supposed to be a hybrid. It is one of the strongest kinds, but I don't feel strong. I don't think I have ever really amounted to anything.
"You are over-thinking it again, Col. You need to stop," he grabs my chin until I am looking at him and I close my eyes.
"Yeah okay," I kiss him on his lips softly because the conversation is actually getting too serious and as he said, this is supposed to be fun. He hesitates for a second, but that fleeting moment is gone and his lips respond eagerly to a deeper kiss. I let out a soft moan as he pushes me down the bed until he is on top. He kisses me on my neck, gently at first and then a little rougher. His weight is pressing me into the mattress, but I find it comfortable somehow; actually, it's more than just comfortable. We are two different sizes, but it almost feels like he completes me. Where my body ends, his begins.
It's like we are one person trying to live in two bodies. The thought scares me, but I fight it out. I don't want to be my usual doubtful self around him. I want to have fun, and that is what we are doing. It's just fun between two adults.
Nothing else matters.
*******************
"How long is this search going to take? We can't keep checking everywhere to only fail Ralph. this is the fucking sixth cave we have checked. We have to find it."
I open my eyes and I am alone in bed, but his voice is loud and angry.
"Yeah, I know. We are leaving this fucking retreat in a couple of days. We need to have a meeting and talk about the next plan. The guys should return tomorrow." he adds and I realise that he is on the phone.
I sit up on the bed and walk in the direction of the bathroom, he is trying to be quiet, but I don't think he realises how loud he is being.
"The next fuck up we have will end up paying for it.''
He doesn't sound like the man I have come to know and I know I don't really know him but he sounds serious and that scares me.
"Okay, bye,'' I hear him end the call and I run back in the direction of the bed. The door opens before I succeed in pretending to sleep and he smiles "Hey, you are awake,'' he stops in front of me and pulls me closer to him.
"I didn't mean to eavesdrop, I am sorry"
He shrugs "I don't care. I am not hiding anything from you.''
"What are you looking for?'' I ask him curiously.
"Something that has shown to be impossible to find."
"What is it?''
He looks away and I turn to the direction he is facing "The sun is up, how are you going to sneak back to your room?'' he asks me.
I sigh because he is right "Shit, why did you let me sleep off?''
He smiles "Cause you looked good in my bed.''
I look around for my clothes but there is a smile on my face as I grab my things and leave his room. "I'll see you tonight?"' he asks before I walk out of the door and I end up nodding because I want to spend the rest of the week with him.
Suddenly I have something to look forward to.
The halls are empty as I make my way and I try to be quiet until a door at the end of it opens up slowly.
"Colin.''
Your gift is the motivation for my creation. Give me more motivation!
Creation is hard, cheer me up!
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