1 Prologue

Antoinette Robins, who preferred to be called Toni, sat in her hospital bed listening to the doctor drone on and on. Unlike her overly optimistic parents, she was not in denial about her current situation. Barely able to move her arms and legs, resembling a skeleton with skin pulled over it, and lacking any hair, Toni knew she was about to die. It had been a long battle; she had been diagnosed with bone cancer when she was just two years old, now, at sixteen, she was just thankful for the time she had been given. Treatments had worked the first time around, but when the cancer came back with a vengeance, nothing seemed to help. She had already spent the last nine years in the hospital undergoing various treatments for it. Yes, Toni thought, she was truly ready to die.

Her only escape was to the land of virtual reality video games. While she didn't have much strength anymore, virtual reality allowed her to escape the confines of her hospital bed and feel free and healthy, something she had never fully felt. She could run here, fight, play with others, thoroughly enjoy life. If only she could remain in those dream-worlds forever. A throat clearing pulled her out of her fantasy, alerting Toni to the fact that she had just been asked a question.

"I'm sorry, what was that?" she said, looking dazed; dazed and fatigued were the only faces she knew how to make anymore.

"We asked if you wanted to try the new treatment, sweetie," her mom replied.

The new treatment would require finding a donor from the dead and replacing the entire bone with a new bone. Recovery would take years, and the scars would be tremendous. The success rate was not known as the procedure had only been done experimentally in rats before. While her parents believed that it could be her saving grace, Toni felt as though it was just more unnecessary pain to endure.

"I know you want me to," her quiet voice rasped out, "but I'm tired of this. It's been years, mom. I'm so tired. Can't I just go into the VR games and let my body pass that way? I mean, at least I could move or not feel pain. You could be there too, if you wanted, to say goodbye somewhere other than a hospital."

She started coughing, the exertion of trying to plead her case taking away her breath. Her mother was crying and her father looked disappointed. Neither of them enjoyed her playing the games, but they could do very little about it as it truly was her only escape anymore.

"You want us to watch you die, one way or another, is that it?" her father asked in a demanding tone.

Looking back and forth between them, the doctor was ready to interject when needed. He held his tongue, however, while looking very concerned for Toni and upset with her father; the child had been in his care for several years now and it was plenty evident to him that she was ready for release. Thus the reason he had suggested letting her decide before continuing with the experimental treatment.

"I want you to let me go," she said through a few small coughs. "I'm ready. I'm tired. I'm sorry."

Tears were now streaming down her face as well and her father's softened. "We can't watch you die, hunny," he said gently.

"Then don't, but don't force me to undergo anymore treatments. I've had enough," she stated through her tears.

Nodding, he collected her sobbing mother and went into the corridor to talk to the doctor. It was a sad day, and no one in the hospital wanted this outcome. But Toni had been given a choice finally, and she decided she was done. What more could they do to ease her pain without adding more first?

Her parents came back in, her mother still sobbing and her father looking glum. Toni knew what was coming and knew it was time to say goodbye to her parents. She tried to contain her sorrow, to look at their faces clearly, to remember every aspect of them, but the tears blurred her vision and the sobs drowned out their voices. It seemed like they stayed huddled up to her, hugging and kissing and crying over her, for hours before they finally said goodbye for the last time. Never again would she see them, and the thought broke her heart.

Shortly after they left, the doctor entered with the virtual reality equipment. "Are you sure this is what you want?" he asked.

"Yes," she said firmly. She still had tears running from her eyes, but whatever time she had left, she wanted to spend in her game.

"After you've signed in, we will shut off all the machines," he explained. "However long your body lasts without our help is how long you have in the game. I make no guarantees, but it will most likely not take long. Your lungs are half full of fluid and your heart is already laboring greatly to work."

"I know, that's why I don't want any more treatment," she stated.

"Oh child, I am so sorry that this was the hand you were dealt," he said sorrowfully.

She just blinked in reply as he finished setting up the equipment and placed the hood on her head. Laying her back, he turned on the machine, and instantly a bright light enveloped her vision. As if running through a time-warp, the silver waves continued until they cleared into a beautiful forest landscape. Toni had known her time would be increasingly short, so she had taken to staying in her favorite zone within the game. It was a peaceful zone meant for fishing and gathering rare materials through bargaining with the local fairies, but she did not come here for that.

This was her favorite place because it was where she and Gideon had first met. Gideon had been another like her; a young teen stuck in the hospital. The only difference was that he had had an inoperable brain tumor that limited his physical capabilities and affected his health instead of cancer. Since he was at a hospital in England and she at a hospital in the States, they used the game to communicate with each other and give each other hope. They also made plans for the future, both for the positive and negative outcomes. Day in and day out they would play in the game, always meeting in this same spot, until the day came when, much like she was now, he told her he was dying and wanted to say goodbye. They both had known it was coming for both of them, but she had hoped she would have more time with him. It had been a few months since then, and she was content knowing she was in the same place where she had said goodbye to him.

"I'm coming to meet you again, Gideon," she said as a tear rolled down her cheek.

She sat on their favorite rock overlooking the vast lake and flowers of the Fae realm. While others traveled close by and even more fished in the lake, she simply sat and enjoyed the scenery. With one final breath of contentedness, her avatar slowly dissipated. In the real world, nurses were noting the time of death and comforting each other over the loss of yet another child.