1 Darkness is always there

Darkness…..

All around me is shrouded in a black blanket of darkness…

The air is wet and heavy with the smell of fresh rain while a sharp wind slices through the surrounding making a shrill whistling noise…..

It's cold…

All I can feel is coldness and the unknown dark that shrouds me…

I wonder if this is what death feels like?

I hope not…. I'm not hoping for a warm meadow with angels flashing their wings or a reaper rowing me across a river… I just want…..I..I .... I just need someone.....or something.. to tell me what's going on....

Where am I?

Who am I?

What am I?

I don't know….Please just tell me...

I loathe being left in the dark… Rather it's the darkness that surrounds me now or not knowing what situation I'm in…

I'm scared....

Life is scary, death is scary, the world around me is a nightmare that I can't seem to escape from.

I wonder why that is....Is it just me that feels that way? or does everyone else feel this way to?

My life has always been filled with darkness... Maybe that's why it feels like home to me.

My home....I haven't thought of something as my home in a very long time.

What is a home exactly? I've never had a true home... I want one though.... Something to call my own, something to go back to...

And yet I don't... I never will...

For I am already dead...

Ill never have a chance to call something my own again...

So ill just welcome the darkness, embrace the thing that ive been running from my entire life.

Hello the new me

Goodbye the old