15 Chapter 14

Arjun's POV:

"If you don't mind me asking, how long has it been since your father has passed away?"

Just when I had mustered some courage to apologize, she beat him to it by asking this

"It has been more than eight years," I replied bleakly.

"Then it means you are ignoring your mother for more than eight years. I see. I know it's not my place to judge you or to pass comments on your family's situation, but I want to say this. Do you know the reason why she called me, an outsider, for help instead of her son in that situation?" she asked me but after not getting any response from me, she turned her face towards him.

Even though I knew the reason, I didn't know how to answer her. So, I chose to stay silent but, in my heart, I was really feeling bad that mom chose to call others instead of me.

Now when things had become tough, I didn't have any right to blame my mom because this was all my own doing.

I was the one who pushed her away, so I should be the one to face the consequences and didn't have a right to feel bad when situations like this arise.

"Not willing to answer now. It's okay but I am sure, deep down in your heart, you already have the answer to my question."

"I met her at a temple. I didn't go to the temple to offer my prayers like others, but l used to go there to get the answers to my unanswered questions. Maybe the god pitied me, so he offered the answers in the form of Sarada aunty."

"Your mom always used to sit in the temple for hours looking at the deity just like me. She has a very calm personality and has a soothing aura around her, which is very hard to ignore," she said.

"I used to observe her whenever I visited the temple. She might have noticed me observing her, later she was the one who initiated a talk with me. She has a lot of knowledge of ancient history. Our conversation usually started by discussing mythological facts and ended with casual talking, " I smiled a little, remembering my mom's obsession with history.

In the past, mom used to work as an assistant professor at the university. Later when I was born, she gave up her career to look after the family.

"Like that, we became very close. I didn't know when, but she became a very important person in my life. I can't say what happened, but she stood with me when I was at the lowest point of my life," she said after giving me a sad smile.

"She encouraged me not to give up. I don't know what happened to you in the past but just like you, I also isolated everyone including my own family. So, I don't have any right to lecture you when I am doing the same thing to my loved ones,

"I can't express my gratitude just with the words for what she had done for me. I am grateful to her. She is the reason why I am standing in front of everyone with my head held high.

"Once I got a chance to ask her outside the temple about why she always looked at God for hours in the temple. She told me that it gave her the peace which she wants in her life. Even I used to look at God, but, it didn't give me any peace. Instead,d it created a huge turmoil in my heart.

"When l asked her the same, she told me ' You look at the God with a questioning gaze while I look at the God with a thankful gaze. Isn't there a difference between the two? Our eyes represent what our heart wants. We both are doing the same thing but with a different intention. You must be wondering why I am always helping you, right? You remind me of my son a lot. He is just like you. But I can't help him because he won't allow me to do so. That's why I am helping you. Instead of blaming God, be thankful to him for what you got. You will eventually get the answers to all of your questions'. That was her reply to me."

"When she is willing to do so much for an outsider who reminds her of her son, just imagine how much she can do for her son. What I want to request you is, just allow your mother inside the walls which you have built around yourself. She will help you to go through every hardship of yours very successfully, without letting you know any pain."

"Sorry if I crossed my limits. Earlier when I heard her pained voice over the call, I felt my whole body go rigid with fear. I was calmed only when I was sure that she was out of danger. She is just like my mother. Don't push her too far where you won't be able to reach her," she said as if she was controlling herself not to cry in front of me. My gaze softened a little when I saw her teary eyes.

"I understand. I know I am not doing a great job of being a son, but I love her a lot. With love, there comes a fear, right? After losing my father, I felt that fear for the first time, a fear of losing someone so dear. That's why I detached myself from everyone including my mother, to protect myself from going through the same pain again. I'm afraid of what if my fear becomes true again. So ignoring everyone, I drowned myself in my work.

"But today when I heard that news about my mom being hospitalized, I felt that my fear was becoming a reality again. At that moment I understood how important she is to me and at that same time, I realized that I can't continue to live my whole life with the same fear. I decided to live in the present. In the future, what may come in my way, I will face it bravely. Thank you for your words. They helped me a lot in my current predicament," I replied, giving her a full-blown smile.

"By the way, I am sorry for my previous behavior. I was not aware of the fact that you are a doctor. I know, still, my earlier behavior cannot be justified. Once again, I am sorry," I said. That's how I lost the first-ever sorry in my life to her.

"It's okay. I understand your equation. Also, I already forgave you," She said and I replied with a simple okay and slight smile.

"What? Just a simple okay? Man, when someone says that they have forgiven you, you should thank them for forgiving you. That's basic courtesy. Now say thank you to me for forgiving you," She said, all the while shaking her head like a teacher who got disappointed by seeing the poor performance of a top scorer in her class.

"What's the problem with saying okay? Don't give me that look, I will say it," I wanted to argue more but stopped after seeing her throwing daggers at me and decided to obey her just for once.

"Thank you for forgiving me?" I said, but it came out more like a question instead of a statement.

"Hey! Say it properly. With a smile," she ordered.

I shook my head muttering "God! This woman!" under my breath and looked at her while gritting my teeth, who in return probed me with her eyes to continue.

"Thanks for forgiving me," I said after taking a long deep breath with a fake smile.

I could see her biting her lips to control the smile that was threatening to form on her face after riled me up to no extent but was hiding it perfectly from me.

"It's okay. Unlike someone, I have a big heart to acknowledge and accept the other's apologies," Saying this tauntingly, she stood up from her seat, but I stopped her by holding her hand.

"Woman, do we have some kind of misunderstanding? Earlier and even airport, you threw glares at me. Like, given a chance, you are ready to kill me at any time," I asked her irately, getting confused with her hot and cold behavior.

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