9 MEMORY: Finding X and Y

I’ve always hated those Math jokes about finding ‘x’; such ‘x’ pertaining to the idea of an ex-lover, not the variable in question. Why people always associate things with romance was something I didn’t get at all.

My classmates, however, played along with our teacher’s joke as if they had tons of experience already at our age. Well, maybe they already had, one way or the other, and therefore could relate to it.

I looked at Yana, instinctively waiting for her reaction when I got distracted by a loud cheer from students taking the stairs outside of our classroom.

Oh yeah, I almost forgot it was our school’s Sports Festival this week; which meant another boring week for me. It was the opposite for most of my classmates here who had rushed to the gymnasium to watch the basketball game for the day.

During Sports Fest, teachers would let us watch the games for the length of one period or two. I, however, couldn’t care less and headed to the restroom instead, not even bothering to take a peek at the ‘commotion’.

Back in the classroom, I was surprised to find a few of my classmates staying behind. It seems not everyone is as enthusiastic to watch the athletically-inclined boys, I thought. Three of my classmates were reading pocketbooks; one was sleeping; while the rest were doing homework in advance.

I followed suit and chose to do the last one, realizing how productive and practical it was. I brought out my Math Workbook, a pencil (it was cheaper to use in writing solutions), and an extra sheet of paper.

I’ve always regarded Math as an interesting subject. Providing solutions and finding the right answers were challenging things to me. I wasn’t the smartest when it comes to numbers and problem solving, but I found myself quite being competitive in being correct.

It was one of the subjects which I find easy to understand because one only needs to see the pattern, familiarize with the problem, and apply a certain formula.

There is no one way to look at it, and you can get around in finding out what works best for you. Sometimes, it doesn’t matter how many steps you make until you get the answer; what matters is that you get it, and you get it right.

Being able to find the answers by myself was the most rewarding of all. It was proof that I didn’t need anyone. I only needed myself.

I was getting serious in an item when I accidentally elbowed my eraser which tumbled down to the floor. I was scribbling intently that I purposely ignored the fallen object, when someone retrieved it to my surprise. I was about to turn around to say thanks when a figure hovered in front of me.

“What a hardworker,” Yana said to me with an amused expression.

I just gave her a shrug and watched her sit beside me in awe. Of course, we were seatmates, silly me. Somehow I was tempted to ask why she came back with plenty of time left to watch the game.

“Got bored?” I asked, my eyes not leaving the work sheet.

“Well, I’d rather be here instead,” she said, and with that she took her Math book to work on the problem sets as well.

“Good choice,” I mumbled to myself.

I laughed when Yana asked me to slow down so she could catch up to me. She got competitive when I told her I already finished mine (I had started way earlier than her anyway).

I found myself watching her jot down her answers one by one; her pen dancing gracefully and neatly on the scratch paper. I’ve always admired her immaculate handwriting even when she’s in a hurry. Well, she writes quite fast naturally though, and her brain works no less. No wonder, she managed to advance to being the top of our class this year. Not to mention the prettiest too, in my opinion. I couldn’t help but wonder if she had been this perfect all along.

Yana finished her homework earlier than expected and we compared our answers. If an item didn’t match, we would solve it again at the same time.

We talked as if we were the only ones in the room. It wasn’t every day that I got to hear my voice loud and clear, since mine usually gets drowned in the flood of other voices. And it was a surprise that I didn’t care at all if I got carried away, or if the other people in the room noticed. All I cared about was having a good time with Yana.

We ended up proving she got most of the answers right. I beat her in an item, and Yana praised me for it.

“See? It’s pretty nice to solve problems with the help of others, too.” She smiled at me.

“Yeah. I could’ve gained minus points without you.” I smiled back.

“Hey, Rin.”

“Yeah?” I looked at her closely upon noticing the change in her tone. I couldn’t make out her expression.

“Have you ever liked someone? In school, for example.”

Her question caught me off guard, I didn’t even know how to react.

“Um, do kiddie crushes count?” I replied, confused. It wasn’t uncommon for this kind of talk to happen between girls, but it was the first time I heard her bring up a topic like this. It felt out of place, somehow.

She laughed. “Silly, no. I mean, like now.”

I didn’t have to scan my mind for the images of the boys in school to know that I didn’t feel a thing for any of them. Teachers included, if it was part of her question.

“I don’t know… Why’d you ask?” I simply said.

“Nothing… Just curious.”

I couldn’t get much from Yana’s reaction so I thought of prodding her more but our classmates started to return from watching the game. Yana seemed to drop the topic anyway, but to me, it lingered for a while.

There had been several times where I was cornered by a girl classmate or two just to listen to them fawn over their crushes. And it had always started by asking me first, with the same question Yana had asked me earlier.

My seatmate, it appears, is thinking of that romance thing, too, I concluded.

Never had it occurred to me that finding ‘x’, a commonly-used variable for the unknown, could lead me to pondering a different set of questions I had been unaware all this time.