S2E52 - Clementine's Sorrow
As I'm on my way back to the group with Amy, I notice that Clem's awake, and is eating breakfast by the fire. I notice that she's sitting by herself, just focused on her food. Her head bobs up and down as she tries to avoid falling asleep again. I come up behind her and put my hand on her shoulder, causing her to jump slightly,
"Ah!"
I go around her and kneel in front of her, speaking to her,
"Good morning sleepy head."
Instead of answering me, she leans forwards and wraps her arms around me. I hear little sniffles as she holds onto me. I wrap her up in a hug and pick her up, sitting down on the chair with her in my lap. I just sit there for a while, letting her cry. It doesn't last very long, as she was able to cry her eyes out yesterday. As she leans back from the hug, I look into her eyes and wipe away the tears in her eyes,
"I'm sorry, Clem. I've been worrying you, huh?"
She doesn't speak but instead nods her head and holds me tighter. I rub her back while speaking to her,
"Like I told Amy, I can't promise that I won't be in any danger in the future. I'll probably get into danger a lot more often than I do now, honestly. However, I can promise you one thing; I'll always come back for you."
Clem holds onto me and starts speaking back,
"I had a nightmare before you left."
I lay her back and speak softly,
"Do you wanna talk about it?"
She nods her head and says,
"I… I had a dream that you went out by yourself because bad guys were attacking us. You wanted to get rid of them before they could hurt any of us. But… you didn't come back. So, I went out to look for you and… I found you sitting on the floor and dying… Like Lee…"
My heart tightens up as I hear her say this. I'm about to tell her that won't happen… But I know she's smarter than that. Especially since she went through Lee's training. I sit with her for a few seconds before I speak,
"Clem. I won't say that'll never happen. With the world we live in, death is just waiting for someone to mess up a single time. Even I'm scared of situations like that…"
I lean her back a little, looking in her teary eyes,
"But… We can't be frozen by those fears. If we are, that's how death wins. I'm so scared to lose any of you, and that was used against me yesterday, where I made that stupid decision to attack rather than run away."
I move her hair behind her ear and continue on,
"We're all scared to lose the ones we love. But…"
Images of my friend from before flash in my mind… For… Some reason… I can't remember her name…
"If we live in fear of finding out who's going to die, we'll end up regretting not spending more time with them when they were alive. We'll have lived fearing their loss, rather than celebrating their life."
Clean nods her head as more tears fall from her eyes. I give her a smile and say,
"Wanna talk about Lee?"
The tears begin to flow again as Clem talks all about her time with Lee. All the people he helped, the times he'd saved her, everything.
It seems he went through with all the good choices and kept everyone alive that he could. She even said that he separated with Duck and his family rather than him dying. I listen to her, taking in everything she says. And then she gets to the end…
"A-and Lee… He… He didn't wanna turn… S-So I…"
My chest tightens and I feel some tears starting to build in the corner of my eyes. I pull her in and hold her tight while lightly rubbing her back,
"You did the right thing, sweetheart. I'm sorry you had to go through all that. I'm sure Lee was proud of you. You're a strong girl."
I kiss her forehead and let her cry for a few minutes. A few other people come sit around the camp fire, eating breakfast and chatting. After while, Clem finally backs up. I give her a slight smile and say,
"Feeling better?"
She nods her head and falls back down onto my shoulder, clearly still tired. Carol, who I haven't spoken to much, asks me a question from across the bonfire,
"Penny, uhm, just a question."
I look at her and nod my head,
"Yeah?"
She says,
"Would you like for me to give you a haircut?"
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