11 Memory

[Hina woke up to the burning pain in her back. Her mother had whipped her mercilessly the night before for not properly making dinner. She had cried and begged her mother to stop.

"Stop, please! I'll do better!"

But the woman never listened.

Her back was red from the pain and Hina could barely stand up, but she had to. She had to prepare breakfast for her mother. The sun was not yet out and the skies were still dark. Hina loved the skies. She loved to stare at the changing colours of the clouds so far away, but yet so close. She had heard from the other children about a popular candy that looked like the clouds but she had not yet been lucky enough to see it.

"Please, let my mother love me today. Even if it's just for one day" she would always pray to the skies and her prayers were always the same. For her mother to love her for just one day.

She forced her tiny body to stand up from the cold hard bed as she had chores to do before her mother woke up. Hina was nearly nine years old. She was very introverted and very tiny for her age, so she was an easy target for the other kids. They would often tease her and make fun of how she did not have a father, so with time, Hina prefered the comfort of being alone.

As she swept through the house and prepared breakfast, her mother called out her name in the sweetest manner. Something Hina never thought would happen.

"Hina~ oh Hina~~"

Despite the rarity of what she was hearing, Hina found herself smiling ear to ear, as she served the woman's breakfast. A simple french toast she had made with the remaining bread she got from the Bakery yesterday and some fresh hand-squeezed orange juice. Hina had made it so often for her mother that she had perfected the easy meal.

"Good morning, mother"

"This is great!" The woman complimented the orange juice as she took two sips from it. Hina was elated!

"You're not totally useless after all, Hina. At this rate, you might just end up having your own orange juice business!" The beautiful woman laughed at her comments and continued to munch on her breakfast.

Hina always thought her mother was the most beautiful woman in the world. She had barely seen the other women in her neighbourhood but she knew they couldn't compare to her mother. Her beautiful brown eyes and her luscious deep red hair were so strikingly incredible. Hina hated the fact that she didn't take after these features from her mother. She too wanted red hair and brown eyes like her mother but instead, she had ugly golden eyes that scared other kids. Despite these, Hina was surprisingly a copycat version of her mother, as her looks overlapped with that of her mother. Some neighbours even said that Hina was a prettier version of her mom but she knew they were all just liars. Her mother had warned her not to believe such lies.

"Hina darling~ the breakfast was amazing! You've made me happy today"

"I'm only happy if mother is happy"

"Good girl. Now clear up the dishes and go have a bath. We have a place to go together"

"Yes, mother"

Hina cleared the empty wooden tray away from her mother. She couldn't hide her smile! Her mother had complimented her and smiled at her.

[I wouldn't mind a beating every now and then if mother smiles at me]

The pain in her back felt worth it and she suddenly felt as if her prayers had been answered.

[Thank you, skies! I'll be a good child to mother]

Hina quickly washed up so as not to upset her mother. She was careful not to pour the water on her back and she made sure to bandage the injury in the best way she could.

"Hina~ come here!" Her mother called from outside the room door.

The beautiful woman was all dressed up in a nice red dress and Hina was in awe.

"Come here, let me wrap it up for you"

Hina blushed throughout while her mother dressed up her injury and offered her a plain yellow dress to wear. It was the best dress Hina had ever worn in all her life.

"Thank you, mother"

"Of course"

_____

The warm sun was out on this sweltering summer day. The day signified a lot of "first time" for Hina. It was Hina's first time in a carriage. Her first time being so dressed up and also her first time going into the popular busy city. Some of the other kids in her neighbourhood had boasted about their visits to the city centre and now she had something to boast about too. She wanted to stare out the window but knew better than to offend her mother, so she stayed still like a good girl.

After what felt like a long time, the plain wooden carriage eventually came to a halt and the two got out. The view before Hina was one she never thought she would witness. Despite the towering black gates, the buildings behind them were still in full view. The quiet, clean streets were a complete opposite to the ones Hina was used to. She watched as her mother gave something to one of the guards with a smile on her face. After a while, the gates were opened and they were both let in.

"Stay close to me, Hina"

"Yes, mother"

Hina walked slowly behind her mother as she eyed the new environment. The tall black street lamps, the uniformly dressed guards and even the beautiful greenery were all alien to her. Even the air was nicer here. The two walked for about ten minutes before they reached the main estate. The white buildings and the gardens were so beautiful that Hina didn't know where to place her focus.

"What are you doing? Let us in!"

Hina flinched as her mother raised her voice at the middle-aged man blocking their path. He stood firmly in front of the huge white doors behind him with a frown on his face.

"I cannot let you in without permission, you know that much, Yuri" the man's tone was calm and unfriendly. Hina didn't like the old man. She could tell he was going to make her mother angry.

"How dare a mere butler call me by my first name?! I'm here with the Minister's daughter who he shamelessly abandoned! Let me in! I'm not leaving until he comes out here!"

[Mother is very angry now] Hina panicked. Her mind had not registered a word her mother had said so far as fear enveloped her.

'I don't want mother to be angry' she thought to herself.

"Please let my mother in, Sir!" Hina held onto the butler's sleeves, her hands were a trembling mess. The neatly dressed man stared at little Hina with a surprised gaze.

"How does she have such bright golden eyes?..." he trailed off as he stared down at the child.

After an awkward silence, he eventually let them in, telling Hina's mother something along the lines of "don't say I didn't warn you"

The two were situated in the reception room. The white and green interior was all too clean for Hina. She felt the need to remain standing so as not to dirty the cushion but she eventually sat down next to her mother.

"Hina, you'll get to see your father today. If you're lucky, you might even get to live with him. Isn't that great?" The woman seemed very excited about the occasion but Hina wasn't. She only needed her mother.

[Mother will be angry if I tell her I don't want a father right?]

The heavy footsteps could be heard approaching and Hina's mother stood up from her position to adjust her dress.

Hina watched as a couple of strangers confidently strolled into the room. Their gazes showed nothing but disgust, anger and hatred towards the two and Hina felt smaller than usual. She wanted to hide behind her mother's dress, but the woman pushed her forward as if she was offering a gift to the strangers. The strangers consisted of an elegant couple and a young boy. The boy was much taller than Hina and he had shiny golden eyes, just like Hina. They all looked so neat and shiny as they stood there together.

Hina noticed the man's cold expression as his golden eyes questioned her existence.

"Minister, I've brought little Hina to see you today. This is your blood daughter, Hina"

The elegant woman scoffed at Hina's mother and shot Hina a wicked gaze.

"Hina, introduce yourself. This is your father!"

"I- it's a pleasure to finally meet you, father- " Hina was trembling before the elegant man as he stared at her with a cold expression.

"What a sly fox! Already acting like her mother!" The elegant woman suddenly slapped Hina before she could finish her greeting.

"How dare you slap the Minister's blood child?!" Hina's mother hissed and pulled Hina closer to her.

"Enough! Both of you!" The man yelled. He watched as the little child rubbed her reddened cheek without crying, uninterested in the entire situation.

"She may have my eyes and my blood but she is no child of mine. I will never recognise her as my child, I've told you this much before" his voice was calm despite his harsh remarks.

Hina caught a glimpse of the beautiful boy as he smirked at her. A look that told her to know her place.

"What do you mean?! She's your flesh and blood!"

"Leave with that thing now!" His tone became even harsher.

"I'm not leaving! Not until you admit that she's your child and give me my rightful place as your mistress! You can't do this to me! I've worked so hard to raise this brat of yours! Make me your mistress or at least pay me for all the painful years I've had to endure!" Hina's mother was enraged as she complained about her life.

The minister soon ordered his guards to throw the mother-daughter duo out of his estates.

"I don't want to be your daughter either!" Hina yelled over her screaming mother, at her supposed father, as the guards kept pushing them roughly. She was angry and did not bother to hide it from him.

The guards were very rough with the two, pushing and pulling at them until they were finally thrown into the streets outside the gates.

"Mother, are you okay?"

"I hate you!" Her mother suddenly screamed at her, pushing her away as Hina struggled to help the woman up.

"Mother..."

"I should've just killed you! You vile thing! How dare you?! How dare you ruin my life?!" She kept hitting and beating Hina, screaming cusses at the child.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry"

When she was done, she stood up and dusted her red dress as if nothing had happened.

"Find your way home on your own. I don't want you around me right now" her tone was now calmer as she walked towards the direction of the awaiting carriage. Hina wanted to follow her. To plead with her to not forsake her, but her voice was silent. The once numb pain began to resurface and she couldn't stand up from the ground.

[Please, don't leave me here alone]

She hoped that her mother would turn back and look at her. Just once.

Just this once.

But Hina's mother never looked back.]