"You're a disgrace to our family," is what my father said to me when I told him and the rest of my family, that I was going to take engineering in a local university. Why did he say that? It's because all the members of my family has a job that is related to making money and profits and all that bullcrap.
Dad is an owner of a manufacturing company of electrical appliances. Obviously, he will always be away from home for God knows how long. Mom, is a CEO of a merchandising company, but she tries her best to spend her time with her children. While my two older siblings, brother and a sister, is still studying. Those two are taking an accounting course in a university not far away from here.
While I was the youngest one, I was always being left out by my siblings and my dad,but mom is the closest one to me. It happened on a Saturday night. We were having dinner. Brother and sister is currently on semester holiday. Dad and mom was there too. At the start, brother talked about his friends over at the uni and how good they were. He'd never stop blabbing about his university. Sister was quiet, and would only speak when Dad asks her something.
Then suddenly,dad asked me.
" So, Damien. Have you thought about what course you'll be taking once you enter university?"
I was frozen still and couldn't stop staring at my dad. He then lifted his head up after putting a bit of steak in his mouth.
Realizing that I wasn't answering his question he then asked me,
"Is there something wrong Damien?"
Then I was there,back into the real world after thinking on what answers should I give to dad,and what excuses I should have in case things didn't go as planned.
"I'm thinking about Mechanical Engineering,Dad."
Then there was it. Brother and sister stopped eating and stared at me as if I had said something rude. The same goes to Dad.
But Mom,she didn't care. She knows what's best for me. She smiled and just kept on eating.
"Well that's just wonderful then Damien. Then you're going to a local university then?",she asked.
I was about to say "Yes" when Dad interrupted.
"Well that's just great isn't it,Damien? What's wrong? You don't like doing business?",he asked,with a sarcastic tone in his voice. I sensed it, Dad's anger. My head was full with words that I was going to use as an excuse,but Dad won't let me talk. He just won't shut the fuck up.
"Your brother and sister there",he said before drinking from his glass. "They're going to be involved in businesses you know,but why are you not like them?Why engineering. Can you sure your future job would help you in your life?"
That discussion was between us only. No one dared to interfere. Not even Mom. Dad had finished his meal and now is staring at me.
"Well,I can't guarantee that,but I can try. You never know."
That's what I said to him,and I realized,even If I had said the correct words to him,nothing would ever change.
We stared at each other for a full minute,then he broke the silence.
"You're a disgrace to our family."
It struck me like an arrow. Straight to the heart. It's as if he dug deep into my chest and stabbed my heart. Every child would know how I felt when their own father said that to you. Tears dropped down my face. Mom's face was pale. He looked at Dad in disbelief.
Brother and sister couldn't say anything. They can only be quiet and listen.
"You don't deserve to be here Damien. Not in this house. Your mother and I have reputations,and so will your brother and sister. How can an engineer have that?",he asked.
And the next thing I know,that night I packed my things up with tears, and Mom was with me to comfort me. He didn't mean it she said,but no. He meant it. I know those words came straight from the bottom of his heart.
He wanted me gone.
"I would only give you some money for your daily expenses, but the fees for the University,I can't help you with that. The house I bought a few years back, you can have it. Don't worry about the rent and bills. I will take care of it."
Thank you Mom. Deep down I know Mom loves me with all her heart. She wanted me to stay but I couldn't.
That same night, I left the house, and I already set a goal. I would make Dad swallow his own words.