10 09| the victim of fears

Serine

"You think that you'll die without him. You know that's a lie you tell yourself," -Camila Cabello, Crying in the club

***

"Hey there," I heard a familiar voice and I felt my heart stop. I looked at the lifeless body that had their eyes closed and looked at peace. "What did you do to him?"

"Oh you're not going to greet your old dear friend?" He asked stepping closer and I took a step back.

"Did you miss me Serine?"

"Don't come any closer," I hated my voice for sounding so fearful but I didn't have time to lecture myself. I proceeded in taking more steps back. "Why are you walking away?" He tilted his head to the side getting closer. "I won't hurt you," he whispered and that's when I felt my back hit the wall.

"No please," I let out a shaky breathe when I felt him caress my cheek.

"NO!" I head shot up and I found myself staring at my own reflection. I found myself trying to steady my breathing and calm myself down.

Relax Serine. I told myself.

It was just an hallucination. I reminded myself.

I sat there and removed sweaty hands from him. It's had been a week since my dad hadn't woken up. He never woke up so I could see that smile. He never woke so I could hear the nickname "pumpkin". It had been an entire week of him not opening his eyes.

***

"Dad I'm home!" I said putting my keys down. "Dad?"

I halted and tears were blurring my vision but I still saw him.

"NO!"

I ran down to my dad who had his eyes closed while he was seated on the living room sofa. "Dad! Hey dad wake up!" I cried shaking his lifeless body. "What did you do to him?"

But I got no answer.

"What did you do to him?!" I yelled but I looked back and saw the person was no longer there. "Ahh!"

I screamed but no tears were coming out. "Hello? This is an emergency. I just got home and I found my dad unconscious."

"Ms did you check his pulse?" I immediately did it and I released a breathe of relief. "Yes he's still alive,"

"Okay, the ambulance is on its way," It was like I never heard the lady. All I wanted was my dad to survive. "Dad hang in there. You can't leave me now. The ambulance is on its way, okay? You have to be strong,"

I looked up and shut my eyes. "Please don't take him. Not yet dear God, not yet," and then suddenly I heard someone ring the door bell like crazy while knocking at the same time.

But I couldn't hear any sirens. Who could it be? I made my way to the foyer and opened the door and found a very concerned looking Alexander. "What are you- what are you doing here?"

"I heard you screaming and I- I just- are you okay?" I bowed my head down and shook my head indicating no. Suddenly his scent engulfed me when his arms wrapped around me but I didn't mirror his actions. Instead I just stood there inhaling his scent as he kept hugging me. Not until I heard the sirens.

"They're here," my head shot up and I pulled away from his hold. He seemed a little taken back but that was the least of my thoughts.

I watched as they put my dad on a stretcher and I followed.

"He's going to be okay," was the last words I heard from Alexander til the doors shut.

***

And now that brings me to here. I gulped down the bottle of water and sighed placing my head in between my forearms. "Dad I need you to wake up," I whispered. "Mama left me and I don't know what I'd do if you left me too,"

"The doctor told me that you don't have a big chance in waking up," I chocked and a lump formed in my throat. "Prove them wrong dad. Please, fight this lupus,"

"Serine," I heard a voice and I didn't bother lifting my head up to know who it was. "I brought you coffee," I lifted my head up and took the coffee and replied with a small thank you. "At some time you have to go home,"

"I- doctor. Do you have any news?" I stood up staring with much hope. "No, at least not for now. We can't really say anything for now. We have to wait for him to respond-- a simple movement could mean a lot at this time. " He ended off with a sympathetic smile. "Okay," I said softly and looked over to my dad who was still unconscious.

"Come on let's get you home," I heard Alexander say.  "I'll be back Dad. Be strong for me." I said kissing his forehead gently before giving him a gentle hand squeeze and Alexander opened the door for me.

"Come on let's get you home,"

And for the first time today, I felt at ease