The Heated Truths Of The First Step

Hermione

Yes, she didn't like all right, just by hearing that name her body felt chilled and she gasped in horror. She knew from the beginning that helping Harry had his risks and that she had accepted them as they had come. Erasing the memories of her parents was just one of those sacrifices she was willing to pay for a best friend and for a greater good, but when being told that she was going to be murdered by Bellatrix Lestrange no less, it was very difficult to swallow. She had witnessed her madness in person as they fought inside the Department of Mysteries and later in the attack at the Burrow, she had witnessed the way Bellatrix defied everything except the Dark Lord and knew of her short temper and her deep hatred for all Muggles, but above all, she knew of her almost unrivaled cruelty. At that, she could not help shuddering as she remembered how Sirius Black had died at her hands and how much suffering such death brought to Harry.

"Granger..." Malfoy whispered, a bit concerned as he watched her go incredibly pale in seconds and she also looked like she was going to throw up. Probably unaware of it herself, she huddled in her chair and tremble a bit, either in horror or fear.

Damn, he cursed himself for not being able to tell her about her 'possible' death at the hands of a woman who she probably hated, in a better way. He had come to know a great deal about pain and death in recent months, so he fully understood what she was going through at that moment. However, seeing her like that, in such a vulnerable state, so different from her usual self, made him feel a little compelled to do the unthinkable and approach her in a hug, but taking a look in Potter's direction, he knew it was better not to approach her in any way, or even think about doing so in a near future.

Potter himself was not taking the news too well, since his fists were closed with more force than necessary and going whiter with each passing second. The book he was holding before was now completely forgotten on the floor where he had dropped it in his shock. If glares could kill people, he would had dropped dead right there. It was curious how life twisted things when you less expected them and he found himself unable to not feel envious of their closeness and friendship. He never cared one bit about the so-called true friendship in the past, as his family name was all he needed to have all he wanted, but after falling from grace and had a taste of a great deal of hell, betrayal and pain, he had come to understand the true meaning behind the trust between people. Oh, he was well aware that Potter would not be able to remain calm and collected for long, when Granger could face mortal danger in a near future, so he prepared himself for what was coming next. He prepare himself for Potter's coming rage.

"Draco Malfoy, you better explain what you just said about Hermione's murder right now! I said I believe you about the book, but trusting you is something else entirely. I swear if this is some kind of sick joke ..." Harry said in a menacing tone he did not think he possessed, when he finally came out of his momentary shock. He approached Malfoy with his green eyes shining with a mixture of rage and deep fear. Yes, it was fear, Malfoy was sure of it. The kind of fear he had come to understand recently in a very painful way. The kind of fear that had trigger his change and made him walk a totally different path.

"I would not dare jest like that, Potter. I assure you that I'm not the same bastard you'd come to know before ... Believe it or not, I have changed, since you two were not the only ones that had a hard time lately. In addition, Granger is the most brilliant witch of our day, very capable with her magic and her hands, to inflict pain on me as she did before, you are also an expert on that too, while I am now without a wand to even try to defend myself or to stop anything the two of you could do to me. Why would I expose myself to such madness? I'm not stupid Potter, I value my life much more than that. What I said before, it is not something I invented, it is written very clearly in the Headmaster diary, the very one you just dropped." Potter looked at the book as if he had been cursed, but moved to retrieve it anyways. He simply could not understand why Dumbledore would give the ferret of all people his diary.

"This is really ...?" Potter tried to ask, but he really couldn't. He had some mixed feelings about it, if the thing was what Malfoy claimed it was. As he looked the book, he felt it really belonged to Dumbledore. "How did you get this?" The three of them were supposed to be the only ones that Dumbledore left things in his will, aside from the few collections he gave to Hogwarts.

"A week later... after the Headmaster's murdered, Snape approached me and gave me the diary, the journal was entrusted first to Snape, but apparently the Headmaster wanted me to read it as well, because he had written some things for me too. However, before I had a chance to read it, Snape told me and showed me everything they had both done and planned together, as it took more than words to convince me of all the rubbish Snape was babbling about. After our exchange of Legilimencia, I really came to understand how much of a coward and bastard I was and it shook me to my very core." Harry was going to say something, but stopped when he saw something in Malfoy's gray eyes that he never expected to find in him. Pain and regret. He knew better than to fully trust in anything Malfoy could say, but he had to admit that in that moment Malfoy was being serious. What made him change to that extent? He didn't know, but no matter how much he disliked the guy, he could not name him a liar.

"Almost anything I believed in before, crumbled to pieces right in front of me. I saw Snape's life, the way he sacrificed himself for a cause, the way he even challenged the Dark Lord for what he loved, the way in which he suffered for what he could not have, the way he gave up everything for what was left. He courageously goes on, reaching as far as the Headmaster needed him, while in that time I spent most of my energy doing exactly the opposite, daunting myself in fear when the Dark Lord used me on a whim, to get to my father. I always thought that Snape was under the influence of the Dark Lord, as a Death Eater himself, I thought he wanted to bring him back just like the rest of his followers, but I was wrong. We were all very wrong, but especially you, Potter." Malfoy said and felt relieved when Granger has gotten out of shock while talking, even if all he saw on her eyes was distrust and incredulity.

"What's that supposed to mean, Malfoy? What kind of nonsense is that?" She asked a little surprised for Malfoy's unexpected speech and Snape sudden involvement in the matter.

"I guess you'll have to find it for yourself, if the Headmaster does not explain it in his journal. You can use Legilimens in me, but it will not show you Snape memories, only mine's." Malfoy said a little uncomfortably now. The charm had been used in him before, by his aunt, Voldemort and more recently Snape, but he did not especially like to be read, when the things that could prove his change of heart were extremely painful.

"Why would we want to use Legilimens in you Malfoy?" Harry asked, not really sure of where that unexpected visit was going.

"Because it's the only way I can prove to you both, that what I said before is true, that I came here to save Granger from a very painful death and perhaps to prevent other death's as well." Malfoy said.

"Others? Which others?" Hermione asked and Malfoy gave her yet another penetrating look she didn't like it. Did she want to know the answer? Maybe it was better to…

"A Weasley." Hermione gasped again in horror, fearing that Malfoy was talking about Ron and her heart sank to the floor, giving way to the worst fear she'd ever felt in her life. Somehow she could deal with her own death, but she would never be able to handle Ron's. Harry, on the other side, had turned pale, too. Although he thought of Ron at first like Hermione, he did not miss the fact that Malfoy had said a Weasley, not Ron Weasley, which means that he might be talking about Ginny too and if knowing about Hermione's death has seriously frightened the hell of him, imagining Ginny's was simply beyond all he could handle. Then he remembered the fight he had with Ron a few minutes before, and even if what he had shouted was true, what if something was truly wrong with Ginny?

"We have to go now Harry, Ron is out there, who knows if he is facing the Death Eaters or maybe he could be captured and ..."

"Relax, Granger, it's not him." Malfoy calmly said to the obviously distressed girl.

"Relax you said? It's easy for you to say that because you don't care. You've spent so many years making our lives miserable, so Ron's death would mean nothing to you, but I assure it means a lot to US! You... you're just an evil monster!" And in a swift movement that took Harry and Hermione by surprise, Malfoy stood up and faced the girl who had made something inside him snap. He was equally mad now.

"I'm not going to pretend that I care completely, because to be honest I still don't know how far I'm willing to go save those I'm supposed to. This is all new to me Granger, I'm not used to saving lives and even less the ones I saw as enemies before and especially you. However, I'm here doing the best I can to become something better than I was, I want to redeem myself, I want to be part of something bigger, I want to stop being a puppet for murder, I want to feel that my life means so much more than it was before, I want to start over and free myself from my own shadows, I want to forget how I became the bastard you all hate, I'm trying Granger, not to be EVIL!" Malfoy broke, leaving her speechless for a second. Maybe it was wrong on his part to snap at her, but even though it was very hurt, he still had his pride. Harry watched in silence as Hermione and Malfoy looked at each other with great intensity. All kinds of emotions were running wild inside them and he was a bit lost in what to do, when anything could be possible from then on.

"I suggest you read the diary, it is not he or she for the case ..." Malfoy said looking at Potter who seems concerned about the new development. Maybe it was not meant to be the way Dumbledore planned the events after his death. Everyone knew he was a great magician, but he was just human, a human being who could make mistakes like the rest of them. He would have to find another way to try to do his part, since a direct approach would not work. Maybe he could try the weasel next, (or maybe not) that would probably be worse than the current disaster. In the end, he will have to deal with things the same way as Snape. Malfoy gave Granger a resigned look and turned around to leave when ...

"Where are you going?" Granger asked at his back. He didn't bother to look at her again.

"I delivered the diary to you, so the 'message' is in your hands now, do whatever you want with it. I mistakenly thought this was going to work as Dumbledore wanted it, I guess he also makes mistakes. I will try to help you Granger if the time comes, even if I'm just a monster." He took another step forward.

"You do not have a wand, how are you coming back?" Hermione asked, stepping forward.

"Then give it to me and save me a long walk, there are many things I need to do and time can make a difference, it will benefit you in the end, so ..."

"I'm not going to apologize to you, Malfoy, but you can stay ... for now. Let's see where this is going to take us, do you agree with that Harry?" Hermione asked him and he simply nodded. The heated discussion between them had been uncomfortable, but at least she had finally seen the sincerity in Malfoy's words. Trusting him would probably take more time than they apparently had, but everyone deserved a second chance to try to redeem themselves. He would also see how things ended, even if he had to work harder for Hermione's sake, as well as for the others who could be saved.

AN: When I was writing this story, I honestly thought I would embarrass myself, as Harry Potter is not my specialty and I have been out of touch from the books for years, yet I'm very glad to see that I didn't do it all that bad. Thank you.