We'll this suck's

" " - talking

' ' - thoughts

[ ] - guild chat

~ - noise affect

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I was driving home after getting the series x after luckily going to a gamestop on a whim after going to the store to buy some stuff. Just thinking about playing Halo Infinite on it was getting me excited.

Unfortunately, that meant I wasn't paying attention to the road, or I would have noticed a car near me. It was starting to drive weirdly and speeding up at an abnormal rate. When suddenly he sped up and I saw it crashed with a truck transporting some gas tank.

That got my attention real fucking quick, so I swerved out of the way thinking it was going to explode. Fortunately to my surprise nothing but that wasn't the end because thanks to the accident another crash happened with a truck carrying gasoline and a jeep.

Bracing for the explosion but nothing again, thinking it was nothing like the movies I crashed it to a truck carrying a bunch of chickens. Being confused and hurting but luckily not dead or hurt at least not too bad. More importantly, my xbox series x is okay. Unfortunately, my car is probably totaled, but I'm okay, but I start hearing a hissing noise that's all too familiar to me.

I look around and try to look for the source of the noise until I look at a chicken straight in the eye.

~BOKBOK!

~BoOoM

'That exploded' was all I had time to think about before I died. Now, here I am in an endless void looking like a silhouette but filled with nothing but stars.

"Well, this sucks."

I wondered about the void with nothing but my thoughts for who knows how long. Until all of a sudden, I'm in a chair in the office with music coming from outside, still looking like a silhouette, though. The office itself looks nice but there are some of those things where you store body's in a morgue and some religious looking paintings on the wall, "now that I think about it this room looks familiar."

''That's because it is, I just changed some things to my liking love.''

"Elizabeth Hurley" shocked me because what I'm looking at is someone who looked younger than she should be. "Not quite, but you should have figured that out by now," she said as I started to understand what was going on.

"So I'm in hell, not quite what I expected but I would like to know what sin I have done that was responsible for sending me here" I said looking at her we'll I think it's a her.

'Do angels have genders, or can they change to whatever they want.'

"No, we don't have genders. I mean gender wasn't a thing before Adam and Lilith and yes we can change to whatever we want but I digress what you want to know is why you're here" she said, I should have known she could read minds.

"For starter, no, you didn't not commit any major sin that deserves to be sent to hell, I brought you here for some fun."

I look at her weirdly. She does look beautiful, but I don't think that what she meant 'is it gay that I think she is hot even though she doesn't have a gender.'

"No that's not what I meant but we can have some of that type of fun later but just a warning I'm into some kinky stuff and as for your sexuality, what is that thing you humans like to say it's not gay to like clay or something similar principal" she said with a seductive look.

"Well it's not that I'm not interested but I don't have my fun time stick at the moment as you can see," I said as I pointed at the stars where my dick should be.

"That's why I said later, but on to the real talk, the reason you are here is so I can have some fun. You should know the drill, right? You'll be sent to a world with 7 wishes to cause some chaos."

"Right, but isn't that usually something God or ROB does?" I said with a confused look or, however confused a bunch of stars can look.

"Yes, but why should they get all the fun? It can get so boring when you live as long as we do, and I deserve some fun too, " she said with an annoyed look on her face. "You know how hard it was to get you here without them knowing it took me years to hide you in the void but thanks to that your soul is stronger so you don't have to worry about someone being able to control it."

"Okay, but why me and why when I finally got a series x god damn it!" I spent a year trying to get one, and I finally got one due to luck, and then I died.

"Don't look at me I have no control when or how you die as for why you, I like your style when others said you have angles looking over you because of your luck you would answer back with some like it's more like the devil and that's only one example of how crazy you can think."

'It's true, I always had some good luck at times, and I never saw myself as a good person. But I'm never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down, never gonna run around and desert you, never gonna make you cry, never gonna say goodbye, never gonna tell a lie and hurt you.'

"See, that's the kind of chaos I want. You're literally in front of someone that can erase you with a thought, and you Rick roll me. Not too many people have the balls to do that. You even try to hide the naughty things you think of me. Most humans stop having those thoughts when they find out who I am and the ones that don't are the worst of the sinners, so all they get is punishment," she said with a sinful smile.

"Wait, does that mean you're a virgin? That's a surprise but a welcome one," I said with a smile on my face, I think, but I don't have a face, yohoho.

"Wait you said you liked kinky sex or are you just fucking with me."

"Really that's where your mind goes, at least you're not asking about God like everyone else and for your information there's a thing called porn on the internet. Or are you more familiar with off branded anime either way, even a virgin can get a good understanding of sex and what kind off kinky stuff they like nowadays not to mention that I am the devil and lust is a sin."

"I mean, you're the one I'm talking to, not him. By the way, why are you in that form." She looked at me with an amused smile and said "I like this form, it's nice and really useful when dealing with men and if you are wondering, he takes the form of Morgan Freeman." Not really that surprising. I mean would, who wouldn't want his voice.

"Okay, that's enough small talk. Let's get started with the wishes," she said with the face of a child that can't wait to play with a new toy.