The Couch

Gyaaahh! I'm being plagued by my thoughts, embarrassingly perverse thoughts.

I have a friend, Yoobin, who I've had a crush on for awhile now. Just a few days ago, she and I went to a mutual friend's house and it was all going fine—hot chocolate and all. But the genius that is me suddenly thought it would be a good idea to get Yoobin to dance. In short, I was unsuccessful.

But that doesn't mean I didn't try. When Yoobin eventually stood up to get something, I seized the chance to block her way to the couch on her way back. I had struggled to get her to stand up before, but now, she had stood up on her own. Half the work is done, I thought, I just have to get her to dance now. But the plan didn't go accordingly.

Since I was wearing socks, she was able to easily slide me across the wooden floor. My legs suddenly bumped into something behind me. I could feel myself loosing my balance and in a panic, quickly said, "Wait—!" as I held onto her arms. I turned my head to the side and glanced at what was behind me, worrying I would fall on the hard floor.

To my bittersweet relief, I was falling atop the couch. Or rather I had already fallen on the couch, opening my eyes and lifting my head to see Yoobin on top of me. So that she wasn't crushing me, her arms were holding her up. They were on either side of me, resting in a calm panic on the small space on the couch above my shoulders and next to my head. I had ended up locked in a stiff position with my arms glued to my side, on the inside portion of the position we had found ourselves in and Yoobin on the outside p. My legs were also ended up together as there wasn't much space on the couch, with Yoobin's legs on either side of my legs. Looking at her body on top of mine from a slightly low angle made me instinctively close my eyes shut, unsure of how or what had happened and why we were as we were. For the one second that we were in that position, it's not that I couldn't rationalize the fact that we had fallen, but rather, I was entranced by the rare opportunity. At the moment I could only be in shock at what was happening—having the girl I like over me, as I'm sandwiched between her and the couch—and could only process so much as to think, "Isn't this an iconic situation in fanfiction or in manga?"

It was only a second of time and so much was going on in my brain yet not much at all. Without realizing it, I had closed my eyes but by the time I opened them, Yoobin had moved off of me and sat on the other part of our friend Seolhee's U-shaped couch. Seolhee had also plopped onto the couch I was on, but on the side of me, making me slip a bit. I placed my hand on the floor to regain my balance and sit up. We were all laughing and I had shouted to the two of them, "Y'all, I'm over here falling and you guys don't even care."

But now that I look back, I wonder if Yoobin also slipped and was flustered as she fell on top of me, or if she had purposely taken the chance to pin me down onto the couch. As I've mentioned before, two people in this couch-scenario is a staple for fanfiction, at least for ships. Perhaps, she saw the opportunity and took advantage of it since it's not everyday that we see each other, with a couch behind us, and the excuse of pushing each other in opposite directions for the sake of a challenge (that is, getting her to dance).

Ahhhggh! I really wish I could know what was going on through Yoobin's head!

Did she really mean to do that? Or maybe she only meant to push me off of her but I had unintentionally pulled her down with me? Or maybe she had lost her own balance with the momentum of me falling, and slipped as well. Or maybe she was actively pushing me. Since she's taller than me, she could have easily seem the couch behind me and with someone as smart and quick-witted as her, I wouldn't be surprised if the could calculate the spacing of our bodies in that short second. After all, we didn't get hurt. Her limbs were perfectly around me but not pinching my skin painfully into the couch or anything like that. The couch underneath me was soft yet hard at the same time. And if she truly fell on accident, it's a miracle we didn't crash or collide into each other but rather fell in a sudden but almost graceful, choreographed manner.

Or maybe she had intended to just push me off and only momentarily gain her balance on the couch besides me as she quickly got up to walk over to the next couch. But I suppose she would have had the strength to just push me onto the couch and still be standing on the end of the couch. She didn't though. If I recall correctly, it didn't feel like she pushed me and then climbed on top of me. It seemed as though we were falling at the same time.

Ah, I do wonder what her face looked like in that moment. Why the hell did I not look? I was too busy looking at our bodies in that sudden position... from that low angle. I think I've burned that image into my memory by now. It looks exactly like what it does in mangas, although most characters look at the face of the person on top of them, not their body. It's not that I regret looking our tangled up bodies, but it's not fair that Yoobin got to see my facial expression but I didn't get to see hers. I think it would have given me a better insight into her intentions. Did she look shocked? Did she look smug? I'll never know because I'm an idiot who didn't look.

I also wonder what we looked like from a side view... Or from Seolhee's point of view. Did she think anything of it?

I wonder if Yoobin even thought anything about it. Or if I'm the only one who remembers this. Maybe I'm the only one whose guilty pleasure is recalling that moment and its possibilities. Gahh-! Someone save me from my own thoughts please.