77 Episode 75 - Family Art

Since it was something he touched almost daily, Amari attempted to draw a guitar. Feeling the edges of the paper, he tried to find the center, then moved the markers around in unbroken lines. When he finished a line, he kept his finger in place and attempted to start there, or move from there to where he thought the next piece should be. In his mind, it seemed like a good strategy, but in reality, he had no idea what his drawing looked like. If he worked quickly, he could somewhat feel the lines right after he drew, the marker staying wet on the paper, but even that wasn't particularly helpful.

As soon as the last marker hit the table, he felt Taitai leap onto his back, arms hanging from his neck. With an exaggerated grunt, he reached back and grabbed the short legs, pulling them around his waist.

"Well, what do you think?"

Taitai started giggling loudly in his ear and Amari frowned. "That good, huh?" Yangyang gave him a comforting pat on the back but couldn't contain a laugh. "Well, can you at least tell what I was trying to draw?"

"It's a guitar," Yangyang said confidently, then laughed again. "A very colorful, very abstract guitar." Amari reached out to gently find Yangyang's side, then punched him in it. "Honestly, it's not bad. Definitely abstract, but you can see all the parts. They're just all jumbled up. Picasso would be proud."

Amari smiled, satisfied that it was at least recognizable.

"Oh, are you helping your dad draw something?" asked a young woman from behind, coming to hover over the group. Her tone reminded Amari of every preschool and elementary school teacher he worked with. "Very interesting. An abstract guitar?"

Both Yangyang and Amari snorted out a laugh and Taitai giggled.

"He's not my ba. He's my gēge!"

Yangyang and Amari choked on a laugh again at the correction.

"Oh, I'm sorry," she said, a bit frantic, obviously thinking she had offended them. She probably didn't know what a ba or a gēge was, but the sentiment was understood. "You just looked like a family, so I assumed... I'm very sorry."

Amari waved a hand and smiled sweetly. "No, it's okay. That's a compliment, so thank you."

"Oh, okay... Well, the drawing is very interesting."

"Li gēge is blind!" exclaimed Taitai, as if he felt the need to explain the terrible art to the woman.

Yangyang's nose and mouth were now covered, trying to muffle his laughter, and Amari cleared his throat, kicking him in the leg.

"Yeah, it's actually just s'posed to be a guitar." He smiled again in her direction. "But, I'm glad it's at least recognizable."

The woman stayed silent, clearly not sure what to say in this situation, and Yangyang stood, snatching up both papers. "We should probably give the space to other people now. Thanks."

Standing with Taitai still on his back, Amari bowed a little. "Taitai, say goodbye and thank you."

"Thanks! Bye!"

Yangyang was laughing near him, so he turned to catch up, letting out the giggling he had been keeping inside.

"What're you laughing at?" Taitai asked, sounding a bit upset to be left out, and Amari shook his head, coughing a few times to compose himself.

"Nothing." He bounced Taitai up and down on his back. "Let's go look at the art in the gallery. You can be my eyes."

"Okay!" Barely pausing to breathe, Taitai immediately started describing what he saw, directing Amari toward the door leading to the hall.

"He meant to see the art, Taitai," Yangyang explained. "He can walk across the room on his own."

Taitai let out a small "Oh" and Amari just smiled.

He had laughed when Taitai corrected the woman for calling them a family, but he was happy to be recognized that way by a stranger. He didn't realize something that simple would feel that good. He would never rush Yangyang. He wanted him to be comfortable enough to tell his mother and for his mother to accept them, but he also hated the secrecy.

"Uh, Taitai." He swallowed his nerves as they walked. "What'd you think about that woman calling me your ba?"

"Huh?" Taitai didn't understand his meaning and giggled. "She was silly."

Amari bobbed his head. "Yeah. But how would you feel? If I really was your ba?"

"Huh? If you're my ba instead of my real ba?"

Yangyang cleared his throat and stepped closer.

"No, Taitai," he said sweetly. "He means if you had two bas. If Li gēge came and lived with you, and cared about you just like me."

"Like forever?" After a short pause to think about it, Taitai giggled. "That'd be so fun! Li gēge can teach me songs, and play with me, and never leave. And ba will always be happy."

Amari faltered a step, swallowing a breath. "What's that mean, Taitai? Why would your ba always be happy?"

"'Cause ba is happy when you're here," Taitai answered matter-of-factly. "And he's sad when you're gone. If you live with us forever and never leave, he'll always be happy."

It sounded so innocent coming from the child, such an easy conclusion to make, and Amari smiled at how open Yangyang's feelings were. "Yang ge, even your six-year-old son thinks you're obvious," he mumbled.

An elbow jabbed into his side, then Yangyang stopped. "We're here."

Taitai led Amari down the row of paintings, trying to describe the ones he liked and why he liked them. The images Amari imagined in his mind were convoluted and confusing based on the random details Taitai gave him, but it was clear he enjoyed art itself, not just the hands-on, fun stuff that excited the other children. For a moment, while he was poorly but passionately describing one of his favorite paintings, Amari felt a twinge of remorse, knowing that if Taitai grew up to be an artist, he would never be able to see the things he created.

"Are you alright?" Yangyang stepped closer, a hand on his arm. "You look a little sad all of a sudden."

Amari shrugged, clearing his thoughts. "Do I? Maybe I'm just tired." He bounced Taitai on his back a few times. "Are you tired Taitai? Wanna take a break?"

"Okay." He didn't sound tired, but he was usually willing to go along with whatever, so Yangyang led them to a quiet room, made specifically for resting.

It had a long couch, low light, and books on shelves built into the wall. As soon as he was back on his feet, Taitai grabbed a book and brought it to Yangyang to read. Slouching on the hard cushion, Yangyang between him and his son, Amari leaned back against his arm. He closed his eyes, listening to the story, thinking that life probably didn't get any better than moments like this.

A couple of books later, Amari felt a nudge, bringing him out of his daydreaming.

"Are you sleeping?" Yangyang chuckled and Taitai jumped on his lap.

Grunting dramatically, Amari tickled him for a second, then sat up, scratching at his head. "Just thinking about things." He put Taitai down and stretched. "Hey, Taitai, you never showed me what you made earlier."

"Oh!" He grabbed the paper from his father, bringing it over and placing it on Amari's lap. "Here!"

Running a hand across the three-dimensional drawing, he felt a multitude of different materials. A furry rectangle in the middle of the paper, and a square one attached to the upper right corner. Four fuzzy, wiry lines came off the bottom, two from the left and two from the right. At the top left of the rectangle was a long, curly piece of paper, springing off the drawing with only the very end glued down. There were some smaller objects glued to the square as well, one at each top corner and some onto the square itself, but he couldn't figure out what those materials were.

"Hmm..."

Amari made a dramatic thinking sound, masking his actual thinking. He didn't want to offend Taitai by guessing incorrectly, but it was hard enough to figure out a six-year-old's drawing when you could actually see it. He thought about the things Taitai would want to draw and then smiled, the answer obvious.

"Is it a dog?" Taitai giggled happily, the sound warming him from chest to ears. "Does that mean I'm right?"

"Li gēge! How'd you know?"

"Well, of course it's a dog. You made it so well, how could I not know?"

"Yeah?" Taitai gasped at the compliment and Amari nodded, motioning for him to sit on his lap.

"You really like dogs, huh?" He felt Taitai's head nod against him. "And you really like art?"

"Ēn!" Taitai was excited to answer, as if it was his favorite thing. "Art is fire, tsé?"

"Fire?"

Yangyang chuckled. "According to Minwoo hyung, fire is 'really good' or 'cool'."

Amari groaned and ruffled Taitai's hair, giving a bit more force than usual. "Because we need more people speaking like Minwoo." Yangyang grunted in agreement and Taitai played with the fuzzy drawing, fingers brushing against his as they ran over the different materials.

After a few minutes, Amari frowned, pulling Taitai in a little closer to his chest. "Sorry the sound studio wasn't open today." Before he could get a response, Amari suddenly straightened. "How about we go to a real studio instead? Would you like to do that?"

"Yeah!" Taitai jumped to the floor, then up onto his dad's lap. "Can we go ba?"

"I guess?" Yangyang sounded suspicious, but Amari only grinned playfully as he pulled out his phone.