12 Everyone Hates Mondays

"At times the world may seem an unfriendly and sinister place, but believe that there is much more good in it than bad. All you have to do is look hard enough. and what might seem to be a series of unfortunate events may in fact be the first steps of a journey."- Lemony Snicket

16:30 Monday 9th September 2019.

I stare in horror, then I look up at Russo who was shoving noodles in his face hurriedly. After moping around my room after being forced to leave the gymnasium, Russo 'extended an invite' –as his secretary put it- to have lunch with me.

"What it this?"

"Your schedule for this year."

"Why?" I demand, refusing to accept this horror.

He looks confused as he stops eating, to raise an eyebrow at me. We sat in the restaurant reserved for Professional Spies only, and I understood what all the fuss was about. There was no menu, but Russo had simply ordered noodles, saying "he was in the mood for it". I was indulging in chocolate mousse, but even that had lost its appeal; but before now, everything had been pretty amazing.

"Please don't act so surprised. How else were you going to become a spy?"

I wave my hands around wildly before coming up with:

"Well, I always assumed it was going to be 'downloaded into me"

He pffted and flicked my forehead with his finger then he walks away. He stops briefly to look at his watch then he says while walking away.

"Go to meditation before the sensei gets angry."

I groaned as loudly as possible, some Professional spies gave me haughty looks of disapproval. I flicked them the bird then stormed out dramatically (yeh, childish I know). I dragged myself unwillingly to the reception to find out where meditation would take place. I was told that it was held out on the desert dunes, and we were expected to do it ourselves, and to consult with our sensei only if we couldn't do it. Rosealinde had never taught me meditation, she had taught me all about chakras and qi and other spiritual stuff, but my time in China had taught me all I needed on meditation.

I walk outside the lush green oasis and trek up the sandy dunes. I wore a white toga (I was glad to have decided to stop to change), as much as I liked the heat, I didn't like the desert heat or the winds. When I turned around, the entire oasis on which the spy building stood, wasn't there. Heat haze, blurred my sight but it looked like endless dunes with the occasional scorpion darting through the sand moving quickly and ferociously. I guess they (mythical world) did know a thing or two about deception; I sigh reflecting on the outcome of my life. Who would have ever known, had someone told me I would be a strange 'Hybrid' living thing amongst the mythological world, I would've have scoffed and then killed them, I guess this means I owe Rosealinde for the rest of my life.

This was nice, meditation had always calmed me down, and this was the only activity where the sensei hadn't hit us, when growing up I had been beaten a lot.

I had an hour, my mind started to wonder after ten minutes… I never claimed to be good at this.

"So glad to see you enjoying yourself." Said the dry wary tone of the person in question.

I tried to stop myself from opening my eyes and throwing myself at her. But I couldn't help myself , I just had to know if she was wrapped up even in this heat. I peek through my eyelids to see her reclining on a sumptuous throne-looking chair. Her brim was pulled down low. The scarf wrapped tightly around her jaw, her dark glasses shielding her from the sun. Rosealinde…. I couldn't help the strange sigh that slipped through my lips. So, I quickly cover it up by choking on the sand dust.

"Aren't you hot?" I ask.

I try to keep my cool. With my eyes shut and sitting as I was, my legs were starting to get pins and needles. And Rosealinde's extremely attractive scent was confusing my senses. I took one gulp of air in, forgetting that if I exercised better, I would probably be able to live by not breathing oxygen at all. Which in many cases would help me, for example, this would be one particular time.

Rosealinde's lack of response made me open my eyes and turn around to look at her. She had her head tilted back, her leg was crossed, the heels were golden and sparkled when the sequins caught the light. She was wearing a golden suit with floral lining, and a plain white shirt. She was wearing about seven necklaces and ten rings. One was almost like a claw. I frown. Standing up I lean over her and wave my hand up and down.

"Stop it." I hear her murmur. I froze, then straightened up.

"You okay?" I ask her hesitantly.

I don't know what came over me, but I had a feeling something was bothering Rosealinde. And it was slowly starting to upset me. I was used to Rosealinde's quip, sarcasm; her strange pessimism and arrogance. This quiet reflection I didn't know how to handle. For the first time, Rosealinde seemed to be old, tired, melancholy… all words that shouldn't be used when describing her.

Fuck I was obsessed. I needed to stop caring so much.

"Do you have class next?" I hear her say quietly.

"Um religious studies, I think. And then magic studies." I look at my watch.

"At 18:00 till 20:00." I tell her. She was eerily silent. I see her head move; it took me a while to realise she had nodded.

"Don't mind me then kid." She says with a soft chuckle.

I went around the chair and kneeled down in the sand. I flinch instantly as the scorching sand touching my bare knees. Ignoring the intense pain, I rest a hand on her knee. I was surprised to find her skin was ice to the touch, this made me instantly remove my hand. But I soldier through.

"What's wrong master." I ask quietly. With my mind I reach out across the dunes, I fight with the shield and barriers around the OSS building and scream into Russo's mind: S.O.S ROSEALINDE.

I know I didn't have to say much to have him running to her. It was the same for me, I would come running if someone told me there was something wrong with Rosealinde. I was hoping however that I had done it right, I had never really been taught how to mind read or send mind messages. For all I know I had just sent a loud speaker message to everyone in the building.

"I'm too old for this child." I hear her say.

She reaches out and touches my face. I lower my head, feeling a strange heat blaze across my face.

"Am I wrong?" suddenly she lifts my face up. I automatically shake my head, I had no context to what she could be possibly doubting herself about, just because I never thought for a second Rosealinde could ever get something wrong.

If she told me a plan to spread the plague or kill the entire planet, I probably would think it to be reasonable and just ask if she needed me to do anything. For me what Rosealinde said was pretty much law, there was zero discussion about where it stood morally, whether it was right or wrong in other people's eyes. I didn't really care. But I ask her the question anyway.

"Wrong about what?" She was silent for so long it made me doubt whether she had wanted me to talk, or whether she had wanted to have a strange monologue.

Suddenly without any warning whatsoever she burst into laughter. I froze and looked at her worried that she had finally snapped, she ruffles my hair almost as if I was a dog…

"Strange child." She says in between her giggles.

I smile up at her tenderly, I had no idea why she was laughing, but if it was at me then I don't think I minded much. She reaches up and removed her hat and scarf but keeps her sunglasses on.

Suddenly I hear a howl in the distance, I look over her shoulder to see a blur rushing towards where we were. I launch out of my crouched position, I tap on of my expletionem, my toga changed into my fighting black clothes. I whip out my throwing knives and I feel my body start to tense; adrenaline started to flow through me. Believe me, I didn't like any time I spent with Rosealinde to be disturbed. Let alone by some smelly werewolf. I look at her to see she had lowered her glasses.

And I was shocked to see her green eyes, maybe because I didn't see them often, so I always forgot that Rosealinde had such massive iris and such intense emerald green colour. I watched the way she briefly peered in the distance before she chuckled at me.

"Stand down soldier, it is only the great wolf." I frown wondering who Rosealinde would ever call 'the great wolf'. Then it hit me, Russo!

Well he had taken his time. He came to sudden stop in front of us. Panting like mad. His tongue lolling out of his mouth as his body shifted back and he seemed to forget briefly who he was, or what he was.

Just as I had done, he dropped to his knee, flinching a bit because of the sand, before he rested his head on her knee.

"Master. I am terribly sorry for my disloyalty; I was not there in your moment of need." He turns his palms upwards towards her.

"Please, master ease my guilt with any punishment you see fit." I glare at Russo.

Was he out doing me?

I had not been expecting Rosealinde to suddenly full on slap him, it was a petty human slap. He didn't get hurt, which was abnormal. But the way he yelped like a dog when standing on their toes, told me he had felt something else more personal.

"How dare you!" She said softly, she grabbed his hair and basically threw his head in the sand, she placed her foot on his head where she proceeded to snarl at him.

"You are my dog, you are to come when called. Are you not?" I heard him whimper, he was starting to bleed. Her heel was now sticking inside his skull. But he nodded loyally and started to plead.

"What else are you to do?"

"I am to ensure my master's happiness." He says.

I hear her sigh before she sat down. Her heel was embedded in his skull. Russo pulled it out, and searched for his handkerchief, he wipes the blood off thoroughly. I see him, do some water magic where he used the sand's water, which normally was deep underground. He pulled out a few drops, enough to properly clean her heel. Before putting the shoe back on her foot.

She covers her face with one hand and with her other she gestures for me to go back to sitting on the ground. I sit back down cross legged. Russo stood up and stands behind her, which was pretty much where he always stood when she was sitting down.

We spent the rest of the time in silence. By the time I checked my watch it was eight which meant I had no more lessons, just dinner and then private time.

Suddenly she sits up, just when I thought she was going to leave. She turns around and gives me a blinding smile.

"Lets go!" She claps her hands enthusiastically.

And I just nod smiling along with her. The sun had set and it was starting to get cold. The winds blew across the harsh dunes. I glance at her worried, even though she couldn't feel the temperature didn't mean I wasn't worried for her.

"I found my answer."

"you have?" I ask, unsure what she wanted to drag us to do. Now that she was back to her usual self, I was suddenly feeling annoyed and irritated with her.

"Oh yes. And I think it'll be perfect." She suddenly claps her hands, and her outfit changes.

The stupid bitch changes from a three-piece suit to suddenly some blue jeans, a shirt that said: life is for the lonely and a studded leather jacket. Her shoes became boots, all in all, she looked so normal that for a very long second Russo and I just stared at her. Blinking. The image didn't disperse. She looked the same.

She had a dragon tattoo wrapped around her arm, and it kept moving around. All her tattoos moved around, so I had never seen the same one twice. It was very confusing.

"Come on. This is your private time."

"Well, actually it's dinner time. Eight to nine is my dinner time." I pout and fold my arms refusing to go. Russo was starting to transform; I wasn't expecting him to suddenly growl at me. I refuse to back down. As a hybrid I needed food. She tilts her head.

"We will go back home to eat if you come with me now." I perk up at the mention of home. Rosealinde's palace was definitely home for me.

"And I'll be fine, now?" I ask slowly making sure she could hear me. I watch as she waves her hand and a motorcycle appears, she seems to nod absentmindedly at me, she throws her leg over it. She revs the engine, presses a few buttons, and to my surprise, it suddenly starts to hover over the sand.

Okay… cool.

"I WANT." I pout at her while pointing at the motorcycle.

"Get on." She says grinning in an almost comical way.

Suddenly a tattoo starts to show on one side of her face. I roll my eyes trying to figure out how many different tattoos I had seen by now.

...............................

We had been driving through the desert for quite a while, with Russo running beside the bike, every now and then I would stick my tongue out at him.

"Are we there yet!" I whine loudly.

"WHAT!" she shouts.

"You can hear." I mutter to myself. I was wearing protective gear, meanwhile, Rosealinde was just her usual devil may care attitude. I kept checking the helmet and the straps. Everything so far was okay, my head was still attached to my body.

We came to an abrupt stop, and when I grabbed her for safety, her skin was too hot so I let her go.

"It should be here." She says getting off and looking around.

I look at the dunes, the sand, the dunes, the sand….

"BITCH THERE IS NOTHING HERE!" I screamed at her, angry that I was missing dinner for this.

What I wasn't expecting was her to lift an entire dune, the sand rose in the air revealing a city, I look at the sand in the air, then at the city. I did this a few times. There was a rectangular building with twelve thick pillars, it seemed to be the focal point of the whole city, the ancient city was in ruins with just a few things intact.

Rosealinde suddenly clasps her hands together and kneels down, she bows her head respectfully and says : Em Hotep.

The swirling sand above us that had seemed very unstable, stopped swirling above us in such a terrifying manner, instead, both Russo and I watch in amazement as a human body takes shape. He starts to stride towards us, out from the ground other sand figures rose. The sand also suddenly starts to liquefy before solidifying into glass shards. The figure stood with thousands of glass shards pointing in our direction. The other smaller sand figures stood further back armed with glass spears or swords.

Russo and I started to prepare for a fight, I was secretly super hyped about this. A fight with ancient dead things… sounded exciting. Rosealinde changed into her 'The Don' attire, she just stands there, one hand tapping her chin the other resting on her walking stick. This was her thinking pose, none of the shards moved, we seemed to be standing in some safe zone for the creature didn't attack but it was very obviously warning us.

"Do you have a Bennu?" Suddenly she asks. Russo and I don't take our eyes off the sand figures or the glass shards. The figure doesn't react.

Rosealinde sighs before she summons rain and makes the sand wet, she uses her walking stick and starts drawing figures in the ground.

"You can write in hieroglyphics?!" Russo nearly screams with his jaw hanging down.

I frown unsure why he seemed so surprised, it was common knowledge that Rosealinde was very old and also, she knew everything. Although to be fair, I had thought she was 700 years old, which didn't take her far back enough to the Egyptians… I think? My history wasn't brilliant, as much as Rosealinde tried to teach me, I had mainly used the time to fall asleep in those lessons.

She wrote the question in a language the figures could understand. The figure moves closer to read it. He didn't look pleased with what she had written, he snatched her walking stick and wrote a reply of some sort.

She used her gloved hand to indicate at me.

Every sand figure looks at me. I feel uncomfortable and finger the sharp edges of my knife wishing to stab someone.

"Why should I?" The figure suddenly says.

I jump surprised, His voice sounded misused, dry, lost and forgotten in the centuries that had passed.

"She knows not who I am. I do not care no longer for Terraforme and its inhabitants."

Rosealinde airily waves her hand and her gilded throne appeared. Immediately almost as if it was programmed into Russo, he went and stood behind it while she sat down crossing her leg.

"Oh, Set old friend. Do no presume to be so mighty. You yourself have been thrown out of the heaven hemisphere. You are lucky almost to not have been dragged through Edom. Were it not my understanding of your situation Sept, you are no longer a God. Do not be a fool in thinking I will be as patient in every millennia. All it takes for me is to call the Dark Lord and have you dragged to Edom, to spend the rest of your eternity repenting in Inferno." She folds her arms and looks haughtily at him.

A GOD!

My mind was racing, and I was feeling the ground beneath me get extremely weak. Maybe it was my knees that couldn't support themselves. I had never believed in god, whether it was the all mighty one or the small ones. I was not superstitious. I didn't believe if I hadn't seen one, and during my human life I had never seen any evidence whatsoever. Rosealinde was the closest in my mind to being a possible god, she had never claimed the title. But here for the first time in my life I was looking at a creature referred to as A GOD.

There was silence between God Sept and Rosealinde. What leverage could Rosealinde possibly have over a God? Wasn't she just an alien?

"Fine." He says shortly. Well, he had given in quickly, maybe the threat of Inferno was bad enough to scare even the gods.

He reached down into the ground, he starts to pull something out, then stops to look at Rosealinde.

"Will she return here?"

Rosealinde looks at me. Next thing I knew I was being knocked unconscious and the only thing I could think was…. NOT AGAIN ROSEALINDE.

..............................…

I wake up with a start, my alarm was going off. I blearily turn around groaning as I turn it off.

8:30 Monday 9th September 2019.

I stare at the clock. I blink several times. I rub my eyes. No way.

I grab my phone to check the date and time.

8:30 Monday 9th September 2019.

I throw my phone and it was caught by Jillian who was sitting waiting for me to wake up with a breakfast spread out ready for me.

He looks at me surprised.

"And good morning to you as well."

"What day is it today," I demand angrily.

He chuckles: "ah, not a Monday gal hugh?!"

"But it has already been Monday!" The villain had the audacity to laugh.

"It feels like that sometimes doesn't it!"

"Oh, Bluster gave me this gift to you. Said you will like the extra company as he is moving away now."

"What!" I scream in horror. My pal in crime was leaving me, alone? With wanna-be-punk-villain, smelly werewolf boy, crazy science lady?! This day was getting worse and worse.