4 Chapter Three: Haunting Memories

Fear and panic invaded my heart just as my father's words threatened to overturn my life as I knew it.

"No!" I screamed, hardly believing what they were saying. This could not be happening.

"You can't do this to me!" I shrieked, "To us, to-"

"Calm yourself down Rebecca!" my father snapped, "There is no ' us'! There hasn't been for two years! Your mother and I have been gracious enough to give you some space but enough is enough! It is time to move on."

I sank to the cold stone floor in defeat. I felt like I was losing my mind. We had only been in my father's study for a few minutes but already everything was spinning out of control. He was being so cold, so heartless-I thought he was on my side.

My body was now limp as I stared blankly at the wall, feeling devoid of life.

"Becky, darling," my mother whispered, bending down to my level, "What you've been doing these past months is not healthy. Don't think I haven't noticed the missing potions in my cabinet. You are slowly killing yourself and your father and I will not let that happen. We love you too much to do that."

A broken sob erupted from my chest as my mother now embraced me. But I couldn't let go that easily because he was, no is, a part of me. And he will forever be a part of me.

"But - " I argued.

"He's gone Rebecca" my father stated monotonously " And it's time you realised that too."

"No! You're lying!" I countered standing up, shaking my mother off me, "His body was never found. He could still be out there! He could still be alive..." . The last part ended in a plea, almost like I was trying to convince myself and I was failing miserably.

"And not come back for his own wife?" my father interrupted angrily, "Does that make any sense to you Rebecca? You say he loved you, did you not? So, if he still happened to be alive, surely he would have returned to you by now? " Taking a deep breath to calm himself, he took my hands in his and said in a softer tone, "I would never try to intentionally hurt you Becca, I only want to see that beautiful smile again. Even if it means that you will hate me for a while, knowing that there still may be a chance that you could be happy again, I am willing to take the risk,". He said all this pleading with his eyes that I comply and give him a chance. But my heart was still stinging with the poison of betrayal when I yanked my hands from the traitor and moved a few steps back.

"You said that I can take as much time as I want to heal and I'm still grieving," I accused them angrily, "I can't believe that you're marrying me off to some - some pirate.."

"Merchant," my mother interjected.

"That!" I sneered "Is not giving me time to heal! It's a stab in the back." I leaned against the wooden door feeling utterly dejected as I whispered, "I thought you loved me,"

"We do, honey, we do!" my mother implored. She placed her hand on my shoulder as she continued "We just want what's best for you."

I couldn't be there any more.

With that, I forcefully removed her hand from my shoulder and ran upstairs to my room. I slammed the door and collapsed face down on my bed. But before I could even start crying myself to sleep, a timid knock rudely disturbed the process. I didn't even have a chance to answer before my mother let herself in.

I should really start locking my door.

She sat down on the edge of my bed and started playing lazily with my braid.

"This was not how we planned things to go," she began "We spent the whole day trying to think of the best way to tell you. We waited until the stars appeared because we knew you're too scared of the night to run away, " she chuckled lightly at this "But we are only trying to help you reach another stage in your life. You are only twenty two, Becky. Life's too short and dangerous to waste it waiting for a man who may very well be dead. The merchant is a kind man who will take good care of you when we're gone, "

I turned around to face her at this last part. Taking in her now permanent laugh lines and silvery hair, I too saw that their time was running out on this earth. I was mollified somewhat but that didn't mean that I wasn't still hurting.

She took this as a chance to further convince me, "Mister Dante Silverstone will be a good match for you and your father wouldn't have betrothed you to him if he wasn't."

"But he isn't Cyrus," I fought weakly.

Mother's face took on a tired expression as she stood up and declared "Pack your bags, we're leaving for the Capital in the morning," then walked out.

As the door swung shut, I unleashed a flood of tears and fell into a fitful sleep.

~

(Some time ago)

" Do you see that bright star over there?" he whispered into my ear.

"Where?" I asked, completely confused as to what he was pointing at in this ocean of stars.

"Over there," he pointed northwards, "The one which dazzles the most,"

I looked in that direction and inquired, " The North Star?" . He nodded.

" You could have just said that Cyrus, instead of making me look like an idiot," I accused, lightly shoving him away.

" Well, if you must know, my lovely Rebecca," he said with theatrical flare, "There is a hidden beauty in describing things as they are and not immediately skipping right to the name. When you stop and describe its raw essence, it is like you're seeing it all over again, for the first time; and it only becomes more beautiful."

He took on a more serious tone and continued " Just like you Rebecca. Each time I see you, I study your doe-like eyes, how they transition from forest green to light brown, to even pure gold depending on the lighting, or your ever changing moods. " He laughed at the frown on my face at mention of my mood swings. "Come on, smile for me," he said playfully tugging my cheek.

"Stop this Cyrus, you're being too... mushy." I said for lack of a better word. He had never been this open before; was it because he was going?

"Rebecca, I'm only trying to remind you that you are the most beautiful being I have ever seen walk this earth, and nothing would ever change that." he simply stated with a smile on his face.

In the distance, we heard a man call out "All aboard!".

" I guess that's my cue to go," he whispered, but didn't move an inch. I couldn't move either, in fear of ruining this serene moment.

"I'll miss you," I rasped, sadness creeping into my voice " Why do you have to go so soon? We only married a month ago," . Tears started rolling down my face at the thought of being so far away from him now.

He pulled me into a hug and gently kissed the top of my head. "I'll miss you too, more than you know" As I leaned back to look at him, he said "But this is for us Rebecca. I want to give you a life which suits the queen that you truly are and somewhere across that ocean, is our secret to success."

" But I don't want it if I don't have you! I would rather die!" I argued. Rubbing my cheek with his thumb, he quietly chuckled.

'You've always been a passionate one. Remember this, your passion is a fiery entity. It dances across your soul and lights up your whole being, but if left alone, it can sear your heart and destroy all you would have built,"

He looked sad now, like he saw something that I couldn't see.

"What is it, Cyrus? I won't kill myself anymore, okay?" I pleaded, wanting to remove that sorrowful expression from his face.

"You are my North Star Rebecca. Wherever I am, I will always be drawn back to you. Like how the North Star never leaves the north pole, you will never leave my boundless love." He brought his face closer, then whispered against my lips, " And even if death comes knocking, your celestial face will be the last thought on my mind,"

As I opened my mouth in protest, he quickly shut me up with a fervent kiss. It was like Ferandian fireworks were exploding while I hopelessly drowned in a sea of love, light and bliss. It was like the heavens shined down on us and celebrated our love.

It ended all too quickly as we heard the captain make the final call. Cupping my flustered face in his hands, he studied my face like he was afraid he would forget it.

"I will never stop being obsessed with you," he ended with a smile.

And he went.

~

"Cyrus!"

I woke up with a start. Tears were still streaming down my face as I got up and sat on my window seat which overlooked the town. That traitorous North Star in the distance was not helping me one bit. They told me that my Cyrus had died just before the ship reached the Kingdom of Pya in a violent sea storm. The crews' bodies had washed up onshore, but not Cyrus's. So they just assumed that he went down with the ship. When I heard, I cried for weeks on end and moved back in with my parents. I started to drink Mother's potions to sooth the headaches I got from crying until I became dependent on them for everything which I thought strained me too much. As time went on, I stopped crying as much but the pain was always there. It's still there.

Covering my face with my hands, I continued to cry even harder. Some time during that night I fell asleep comforting myself with the fact that even if Cyrus was truly gone, at least I know that he would be watching over me.