43 The Professor's Secret

"Well?!" Shauna giggled "Is that it?! Let me see it!"

The golden gleam moved back and forth, reflecting the sun. I smiled, holding the delicate, gracious badge between my fingers.

"Come on, you've stared at that thing long enough! It's my turn now!" Having her first appeal ignored, Shauna yelped in a fit of impatience and stretched herself over the café's round table to try and force me to comply.

"Shauna...!" I tried to warn her… a little too late though: the table had already begun to topple as she pushed against it "Careful, or we'll...!!"

"waaaa...." She screamed as soon as she felt gravity move her.

The boys were quick to busy their hands with their orders, lifting them from the table just in time to watch it fall over. My chair fell back, and Shauna held on to me – to try and stop my fall or cushion her own, I knew not –, falling over with her own chair hitting us next. My frappuccino was hurled into the air, it landed on the cobblestoned ground near us, and though my attire was spared any coffee stains, the whipped cream covering was launched upwards like a rocket, and small clouds of cream drifted down smoothly on all of us. Self-preservation was the least of our collective concerns though: All held their breaths and watched as my badge hit the floor with a tiny "clink" noise – it bounced once, twice, from stone to stone, then rolled around itself, wringing a gasp from us... But luckily, it stopped before losing itself inside a gap or sewer entrance. Shauna and I sighed in unison.

Calem walked up to us and watched us from his height, mocking the silly scene – then he crouched, secured my badge between his fingers and raised it high against the sky for better inspection. He smiled as he, too, examined the glow reflected in the metallic covering.

"Did it break?!" Tierno probed, jumping on Calem's shoulder and nearly knocking him down with his weight.

Before Calem could react with the annoyance furrowing his expression, Trevor jumped on his other arm, pulling it down and stretching his neck to try and see it, too.

"C'mon, guys!!" Calem protested, looking at both of them.

"This is the iceberg badge, right?!" Tierno ignored "It doesn't look like an iceberg at all..."

"It does though…"

"More like a mountain…"

"Have you even seen an iceberg?!" Trevor grew impatient.

"Get off me!!!" Calem yanked his arms free and pushed them off.

Shauna and I got up, then we stopped to enjoy a good laugh over Calem's irritation.

The day was bright, moved by a fresh breeze that shook the perfume off the flowers and onto the air. Breathing it deeply, one could not help wondering what a beautiful place Kalos was...

We lifted table and chairs and sat ourselves back on Santalune's café, and there we talked all day about how we all started and what we were going to do next. When the conversation died away, I watched the town's slow movement from my seat – and in watching it, in smiling as the children played around the water fountain, as a pair of romantic lovers danced to no tune at all, and an artist daydreamed over a blank canvas, I inevitably spared a thought from the tranquil lot to dedicate it to Lysandre - to whatever end met him in Geoseng Town as he chose to remain inside the ruins of his blighted plot; to die along with the future he had so twistedly idealized. I wished he could have seen his treasured beauty manifesting everywhere, like, at intervals, we all could; that he knew, at least now, that the flower that bloomed the prettiest would remain so even deep inside a ravine – that the thicker the shadows it grew surrounded by, the more its color would impress.

Every now and then I allowed myself to sigh for him. Every now and then, the beauty of the sun cast a distant, diffuse sorrow over my breast.

But the biggest lesson I had learned from my journey was to be where I was – to sit in the present moment and let not the concerns of tomorrow weigh me down more than they had to. We were together, all of us, just like when our journey started – an occasion that grew rarer as we grew stronger. Soon, each would follow their own way again: Calem would resume his gym battles with the promise of overtaking me, Shauna would go overseas with Tierno to try their luck in Pokémon Contests, Trevor would join his researcher friends in Ambrette town and I… Well! There was something only I could fix, a secret only I knew of… and I had to decide what to do with it. Hesitating between possibilities was enough to chip away at my sanity, if I was still that girl… but I wasn't. I wouldn't let future's woes rob of the present – My decision-making was a problem for later, and right now that was all it represented: a problem for later. Tomorrow, I'd challenge the elite four. After that, and only then, I would think about my prospects… about what I would do… and about the implications of my actions.

For now, I'd just be merry!

-x-x-x-

Time moved forward. My friends and I got separated, we said our nostalgic goodbyes and suffered for it, then we got together again, soon we'd say goodbye again, and so the cycle would continue – of brief encounters and shorter farewells, eventually we'd learn not to suffer in vain. Five days after defeating the Elite Four and becoming the champion of Kalos' region, all of us who were there on that day, who stood against Lysandre and stopped the ultimate weapon from destroying the world received an invitation to a sunset ceremony in Lumiose, where the five of us were to be honored for our bravery against Team Flare and for the protection of Kalos. Our Pokémon would be dignified for their iron determination and coordinated effort, and the love we each felt for them would be recognized and appraised. Don't get me wrong: the impact such honor brought on us was huge, we knew very well the importance of it… but... unaffected children as we were, it didn't even occur to us we should have dressed up!!

We walked through a long carpet stretched out specially for us, crossing an immense crowd of people who cheered and applauded while the setting sun shone bright overhead.

My cheeks burned, my heart thumped in mute and vigorous blows, and each of us grew at once proud and shy under the overwhelming size of the event.

"The entire Kalos is here to see us!" I heard Tierno marvel with unchecked enthusiasm.

"Is this all for us?" A smaller voice speculated.

However hard it was to contain the excitement shaking my legs, I did my best to keep a steady pace forward as we traversed the crowd.

At last we climbed the adorned stand that waited at the end of the carpet. Checking each other's eyes to share the feelings we enjoyed together, we all basked in the loud, scattered shouts of an applauding mass.

Breaking the dazzling golden gleam of a picturesque sunset that put us half-blind in that stand, a shadow marched our way through the carpet – the crowd stopped to stare as the respected, untainted Kalos' own Pokémon Professor came forth to pay us his homage. And therein lay my choice - now it had been made, a subject that tortured me no more, though it still inspired anxiety and demanded reflection, but ultimately, it was done and there was no going back – and there was some comfort in that. Filed away, the options I was previously torn between could only be revisited for nostalgic purposes, to wonder about having picked the right one, to regret a certain omission, to remember my duty, but never to take it back and choose the other path.

Stopping before us on the stage, Professor Sycamore gazed lazily at me through the humming soundtrack of a cheering crowd. He was the beloved researcher, and I was Kalos' champion; So it was only natural, and not at all questionable, that he would seize my hand and present it with a warm kiss of his delicate lips. It was only natural, and not at all questionable, that this teenage champion would blush with teenage crush under his touch, respectful and handsome as he was… beloved by all, too.

In the glow of that mirthful occasion, I was momentarily sure I had picked right, I was confident my silence was the best decision. I got carried away by his meek friendliness, by the city paying us their most grateful homage, by the cheer of heroism and the mood permeating the air – it all felt absolutely, pristinely right!

One last time, under the safety of that secrecy, I let his eyes burning deep inside mine play their spell over my heart's rhythm – then, and only then, their gaze intimidated me none: the ice-cold blue they gave I endured with grace; and endured too the half-teased, half-annoyed smile he would playfully direct me in face of the spotless demonstration of restraint I proudly exhibited.

Calem watched the far-too-long gesture shared between the Professor and I with his quiet jealousy, but not even he could tell the dispute burning in there. He wasn't sensitive to the apologies, the threats and the deals the professor's eyes and mine exchanged in silence during moments like these; he knew not the memories that taunted and teased, he saw not the mocking smiles, the limits tested, the boundaries pushed. And neither Calem himself could help but smile when the Professor held his own hand and gave it a hearty, congratulating shake – he, too, couldn't help but be swayed by the general feeling of that event, and by the sovereign reign the charming Professor held over that city, likewise over me – unsuspecting they cheered, unsuspecting they adored, all of them!

"I speak on behalf of the entire Kalos when I thank you all for your bravery, for your burning spirit and unchanging heart!" – Sycamore took the front, shouting in his steady voice and opening his arms to the noisy crowd "And I present you..." he turned to look at me "...Miss Anne..." He walked closer, stretching his hand where a delicate ribbon lay "…With the Honor of Kalos, for all your great achievements!"

My chest burst with commotion as I seized the trinket, examining it with blurred, excited eyes – all my friends smiled at me, supported me... The crowd clapped vigorously, and a shower of confetti danced through the air descending from the sky.

"Here, here..." Sycamore sighed with playful impatience, picking the medal back in his fingers and, arching down, pinning it to the collar of my dress.

His eyes shone warmly into mine in the close distance we shared there, and he sighed with a saddened, fraternal pride I wasn't sure he was entitled to feel.

"Thank you all!" he walked back and shouted, and the crowd screamed in excitement.

Though no one knew how much Sycamore didn't belong there, celebrating Kalos' safety and handing over honors to us, I felt it an adequate turn of events – a pleasant prank, the kind that destiny plays every once in a while: that he, who defended survival over the foolish ghosts of glory and honor, had to stand there and hand me a medal after both had been courageously maintained; That he was the one to preside over the ceremony of us proving him wrong!

As a personal choice, I had hardly talked to the Professor after the events at Geoseng, and that helped me come to a slightly less partial decision. And though I was reluctantly glad to see him again, my heart had still some apprehension to spare the days to come.

By sheer coincidence, luck, or sneaky talent, soon after dealing with the Ultimate Weapon I found out no one had made the connections between Sycamore and the entire mess with Team Flare and Lysandre, a convenient situation that left him to continue performing his job normally as the Professor in Kalos. Without agreeing to have breakfast, coffee, or any other meal he could think of suggesting me, and actually without even being directly asked to do so in any form, I decided to keep the Professor's secret as it was, so no one besides us knew of his poorly-motivated involvement with Lysandre's concoct, in spite of the well-known bonds he kept with the deceased.

As we exchanged smiles there, I hoped – No, I knew he could see it in my eyes that I feared no second threat from him, cause if he happened to try anything corrupt again... I'd defeat him once more! The embarrassment with which he sighed and pulled his hair back confirmed he saw it, confirmed he knew I would make myself personally responsible for any of his future deeds… And that was the price I'd personally pay for telling no one his ugly truth.

"It can't be helped..." I could almost hear him whisper.

The crowd released a thousand air balloons that slowly climbed the sky – fireworks dimly shone like burning flowers over the golden-lit clouds. In the last day of my journey, Kalos' sky glowed as beautifully as in the first time I saw it. Light freedom and a healthy dose of anxiety cracked open my chest: The future was a great unknown.

That I made no such mistake as to consider it an easily-achieved closure the distance I had created between the Professor and I – it would still take a lot of resistance escaping his claws as they invariably attempted to clutch me. Even now, his eyes still silently challenged the control I had gained over myself – and the more signs of it he saw, the stronger Sycamore's depraved determination grew. In keeping his secret, in being the only one to know what kind of things he was capable of with the power his position held - should caprice tickle him right –, I robbed myself the luxury of physically distancing myself from him, of moving away and gladly burying all that happened between us in the long-forgotten past. If I were to stay… if I were to position myself as close as I could be to keep an eye on him… Say, for example, if I were to take him up on that internship offer to further his research, well… Being so close, truly working on my tolerance to the poisons he distilled was paramount! Their smell was intoxicating, their taste divine… yes, I could remember them well – I could remember them vividly, when he stood as he did, testing their powers still. It would be no easy feat, but eventually, I'd grow used to it. With much effort, and perhaps the occasional slip here and there, I'd learn not to yield to him. It would not happen at once, it certainly would not happen today, not with the blue light his eyes bore under that orange sky descending into dusk. I'd not fret about it either: a problem for later.

"It can't be helped!" I sighed in my own turn, accepting whatever was to come, and allowed the troubles of tomorrow await me there, returning my attention to the exploding colors filling the sky, to our names that an entire city shouted, and to my friends standing next to me, oblivious in their bliss.

The End.