A Hand to Hold Perhaps?

The rain stained the drowsy world where Liam was now at. He sat up from laying down, freeing himself from the grasp of a small boy who slept a little too soundly beside him. Normally, this would make him smile but today was an exception. He made his way down to where their humble kitchen where. Everything he was doing did not register to him. His mind was somewhere else and it was not a very pleasant place to be in. Every year he thought that it would not hurt as much like it did in the first place but every year, he was also proven wrong.

The warm liquid filled with caffeine glided down his throat as he opened the kitchen door to let the cold weather greet him. This day of the year he doesn't go to work and that's all his workmate knew. No one knew the reason why and no one had the courage to ask what the reason was. Liam looked up to the sky and was even more saddened.

Today was the same day where he lost his father and the day that he killed his old colleague.

His mind was hazy from the thoughts that was running around his head but he escaped for a while when he heard his phone ring. With his body going against his command, he walked towards the sofa where he left his phone and saw a familiar name on the screen as he got closer.

"Lucca?" He said in a gentle voice as he answered the call.

"Is something wrong?" He asked as he did not hear any word from the other.

"No. Get ready, we're going somewhere." Lucca spoke in his usual tone. Liam would say yes usually but today was not a day for something else. Today was a day only for him to reflect on the person he lost and the crime he committed.

"A-Ah you see Lucca, I actually have p-plans for today-"

"I know. That's why I called." Lucca replied.

"But y-you don't understand-"

"Eli will be taking care of Alxce. Be ready when I arrive." Liam was not able to give his response as the call immediately ended with a long beep. With a sigh, Liam let himself loosely fall into their couch.

He stayed like that up until a knock was heard on their front door. Mustering all the energy he had, he faked a small smile and to walk and open the door. A brief moment of silence as he looked at Eli who was looking at him with sad eyes and Lucca who stared right through him.

"G-Guys, I'd love to go b-but-"

"I'm sorry, for your loss." Liam was cut off by Eli who hugged him tightly. He took a moment to register as to what the other had said. How did they know? He's never told anyone about it or wrote about it anywhere. He was bound to ask another question but all that was seen and heard was his choked up voice and his tears swelling, threatening to fall.

Liam took shaky breaths trying to stop his tears from falling. He wanted to cry there in the arms of his friend and release his feelings but he knew he shouldn't. Alxce should never see him like this. He has successfully done the same thing of bottling his emotion up for all those years so this year was not going to be different. Except for the fact that his friends now know about why he won't go to work at this day of the year.

"I-I'm fine Eli, ahaha." Liam pulled away from the hug and looked at Eli with a smile to reassure the other that he was fine. Eli could only look at him sadly because Eli knew that Liam was still grieving. Liam's eyes gave it all away. His face had a very believable smile on it but his eyes held so much bottled emotions that they slightly glisten with tears every now and then.

"We did not want to bother you after knowing the reason why you don't work during this specific day of the year but we could not also just leave you alone and bottle up your feelings as if your going to sell them in a running marathon." Eli spoke, the last part of his sentence making Liam chuckle lightly.

"But how did you even found out about it? I never told anyone." Liam gestured for the two to come inside since the rain still hasn't stopped. Eli and Lucca sat on the sofa as Liam went straight to the kitchen to prepare some coffee for them. A small sigh escaping his lips as he looked at the last two packets of the instant coffee he had for this month.

"For the years that has gone by, we really were curious about this day you know? But we also did not want to stuck our nose into a business that wasn't ours and you made it very clear that it was private matters by not saying anything, so we just respected your boundaries as we should because we're your friends. But last night, Alxce called Lucca while crying telling us everything." Liam stopped stirring the cup of coffee as he heard the last part of Eli's sentence.

"He knows." That is what left Liam's lips. So his son did see him cry when he thought he cried in silence.

Liam slowly walked to where Lucca and Eli was with his hands holding their coffee. The two mustered a small thank you before taking a sip.

"From the looks of it he does." Eli answered after a while.

"Alxce, come on down. I know you're listening." Lucca voiced out loud. After a few moments of staring at the stairs, a small boy appeared in his pajamas, carefully walking down the stairs.

"Why don't you tell daddy Liam the things you said to me last night." Lucca spoke with a gentle voice while patting his lap. With his head down, Alxce walked over to Lucca and sat on his lap. The little one could feel eyes staring down on him.

"W-Well I saw papa crying and he does that every year and I didn't want to see him cry but I also did not know how to make him happy so I told the adults. I always see you crying over someone's photo and that also makes me sad. I-I learned in school that I should try to help an adult by telling another adult!" The young Alxce while looking at his father who had really dull eyes. Lucca and Eli noticed this too. There was no sign of happiness in Liam's eyes. It was like he was drowning in sadness and he didn't even bother to ask for any form of help.

Lucca looked at Liam but the other just looked away and he knew that Liam was still hiding the pain away. He did not want to be invasive and respect Liam in any way he can but he can't just let him suffer alone with whatever he was going through. Though he isn't like this, putting his nose on someone else's business, for some reason Liam became an exception. Probably because they were friends and that the latter was a good person and didn't deserve to be suffering alone. No matter the reasons, Lucca was determined to help Liam in any way.