9 Chapter 8

The following day I went to work as usual and I regret showing up for work because my head was not in the game. I was so angry at everyone and I had to control myself from time to time from talking it out on one of my co-workers. What Evan did this time around was just too much to handle no matter how much I try to be strong. After holding back my tears for half a day, I left my office during lunch hour, sat in my car, and cried it all out. After 15 minutes or so the door of the passenger seat opened and Rose sat down. I don't even how she knew I was in my car. All she did was hug for a long time without saying a single word. I didn't know how much I needed that. I dried up my tears and thanked her for being here. She also brought me lunch and I couldn't be more grateful. She got the timing right, she showed up just when I thought I was all alone. That was the moment I thought of going to visit my family in New York because it's been a while since I last saw them.

Rose and I ate in the car in complete silence. I didn't have an appetite, but I had to eat something. "What happened Liz? I remember the first time we all went on a double date before your wedding, you guys were so happy. Let's not even talk about your wedding day, you two are such a match made in heaven, or at least you looked like you were just for things to fail within the first two years of marriage. I always thought that if I am ever to get married, I'd come to you if things are not going well. What went wrong? " she asked. That question or let me say questions caught me off guard and I had no idea what to say. "Rose, if I knew what went wrong in my marriage I would be trying to fix it right now instead of crying in my car in the company's parking lot. Evan happened I guess, he is what went wrong. He went from the man of my dreams to the guy that doesn't sleep at home overnight. You have no idea how helpless I feel watching my marriage fall apart right in front of me. " I said holding back my tears. I can't afford to cry again, I refuse to cry again because I don't like being vulnerable for a long time. "I'm sorry Liz, just know that if you need me, I will be there. We'll always be there for you. I thanked her for the assurance and the food of course.

We sat down in the car for another half hour just talking about everything and nothing. I know she was seriously trying to distract from my thoughts and I appreciate her for that. I went back to the office and my assistant kept her distance from me which was a clear sign that she could tell I was not in good mood. I buried myself in work until it was time to go home. I don't look forward to going home these days. I packed up my things and drove home just to find Evan's car in the driveway. I thought to myself if I was even ready to listen to his excuse for bailing on dinner last night. I spent a few minutes in my car before I headed for the house. I got to the door and someone opens it from the inside and to my surprise, it was Evan standing there with a bouquet of white roses, which are my favorite, with a card that says "Sorry". I took them and walked past him into the house without saying a word. I found Laura on the couch, staring at her iPad. I gave her the flowers and said she can have them. She told me that the following Saturday she had a soccer match and asked us both to attend. I looked at Evan who was nodding at the moment and told Laura that I will see. She headed into the kitchen, took a vase, and went upstairs. Evan came and sat beside me. "Liz, I am so sorry about yesterday. I was coming but my boss gave Nathan and I something to work on which was urgent so we had to work late. I will make it up to you please, I promise," he said

I looked at him for a while. He was lying to my face and I just wanted to kick him so hard that I will leave my footprint on his face. Looks like Nathan didn't tell him anything about calling me last night and it turned out in my favor. "Try again," I told him. He looked at me like he didn't understand what I just said so I continued, "Try another excuse because I know you weren't working late last night and you weren't even with Nathan. I called your boss and he didn't give you or Nathan any urgent work, so try again and I want the truth this time." He looked at me and I did the same thing without saying anything. The last thing I expected this conversation to turn into was a staring contest but it looked like my dear husband was tongue-tied." What? Are you sure you called the right person? Why would I lie to you Liz? " he said. He was still lying to me and my blood was already boiling. Even after I asked him to tell me the truth, he still lied to me. "Evan, when I said the truth, I meant I wanted an honest answer but you are still lying to me? You left work early yesterday and told Nathan that you and I had dinner plans, but you never showed up? Plus what was your friend Suzan doing at your office yesterday? I know you two left together. What I don't understand is where you went and why you keep lying to me. "I said losing my cool. His face changed, probably thinking about how I knew all of that." Do you have someone following me? How do you know that? He asked confused.

I sighed because I don't know why I was still having this conversation. "You know, that doesn't matter, what matters is what I am asking you. You missed a very important dinner and you keep lying to me about where you were since we both know that you were not working late last night. Do you want to know what the worst thing is? You are lying to me even after I told you I want the truth. I already know the truth so you can stop with an act just because you don't have it in you to tell me the truth. I can't help but wonder though, if you are lying to me about something I know the truth about, what about all the times you didn't sleep at home because you were either working late or with the guys. I am starting to guess those were lies too.

Last night after you left me that voice message, luck wasn't on your side this time because after I listened to the message, Nathan called asking for you. Funny how he thought he was disturbing our dinner. So not filling in your best friend gave you away. I think this conversation is over." I said and heading to the kitchen. All the talking made me hungry I guess. Evan sat there for a while without moving for a while.

I sat in the kitchen for about an hour going through some proposals from the office regarding the launch of the new products. After I finished going through them, I made an appointment with Dr. Whitney the following day and went up to my room. I was exhausted and my feet were killing me so all I wanted was a warm bath so I sleep. I went to my room just for Evan to follow me immediately. "Don't you knock?" I asked. "Sorry, I didn't know I need permission to come into my wife's room," he said. I didn't even know I was still his wife in his eyes. He continued, "Liz, I know you are angry at me and you have every right to be because I lied to you and I hurt you but please don't take it out on Laura. Please just come with me to her soccer match. We always go to her matches together." He pleaded but I didn't buy it. My patience was running thin." Evan, look, I will tell her the same answer I gave her, that I will see. That is a big day for the company and I can't bail. That's your thing. And so what if we used to go together? Things have changed because you changed them. You lied to me and you still didn't tell me the truth to those lies. Tell me something, is it Suzan? Is she the reason you haven't been sleeping at home? Is she the reason you missed an important dinner? " I asked him getting angry. I didn't even realize I was shouting." That's not important right now, please tell me what was so important about this dinner?" he asked trying to turn the whole situation around. I told him that he missed his opportunity to find out when he didn't show up for dinner. I also asked him to either give me an answer to my questions or gets out of my room. I was angry, so angry that I needed to punch something or someone.

"You are doing this to me Liz?" he asked playing the victim. I was so shocked that he was asking that question. " Am I doing that to you? I didn't do anything to you, Evan, you did this to yourself and you know it. You were the one that didn't give a crap about me or our marriage and went outside and lied to me. What did you expect me to do? Welcome you with open arms when I don't even know where you are coming from? I don't even know if you are here to stay or you are going back to whoever and wherever you stay. I should be the one asking that question. Why you married me if you weren't ready to settle down. Why are you doing this to me? "I asked with my lips trembling and my tears rolling down my cheeks. He moved towards me but I stopped him. I can't just run back into his arms like that. I won't let it happen. He said," Liz, I am sorry that I lied to you and that I hurt you. Here's the truth though I love you and I was ready to settle down when I married you. I made a foolish mistake and all I am asking is a chance to earn back your trust, please." He said as he sat next to me on the bed. I didn't believe a word he said so I told him he was asking for too much and that if he wants that chance that he mentioned earlier, then he should tell me the truth. Some time passed without him saying a word which was a clear indication that he was not going to tell me.

So I continued, "You know, the first time Erastus asked me to consider the option that you might be cheating on me, I didn't want to believe him. I believed your daily excuses and turned a blind eye to that possibility because I thought we had something special, I thought we were such an ideal couple just like how our friends see it, but I was wrong. If I considered that earlier, I probably wouldn't have gotten my hopes up that you'd show up for dinner last night. I probably wouldn't be this hurt. I can't even tell when you are lying and when you are not. So if you have said all that you came to say, please leave." He got up and I thought he was leaving just for him to turn to me and say," I knew it. I knew Erastus never liked me and he is the one that is filling your head with all this nonsense and he is creating a rift between you and me, can't you see? " Just when I thought this day could not get any worse, the conversation just had to become about Erastus. Just great!

I thought to myself.