37 A Former Psychiatrist

"What? What do you mean you are?" I was caught shocked and tried hard to dodge Abe's possible answer.

"Back in that day, you hit your head, didn't you? Cause your personality in the past, if you compare it with your current behavior. They are contrasting with each other, plus try imagining it being fire and water. It can never be mixed with each other because of their incompatibility," I was relieved that the conclusion he made was different from what I have imagined.

The sudden surge of nervousness in my body because of the thought that Abe caught me red-handed. He seems to have taken the bait that I have plainly shown him to dodge him questioning or being intrigued with Xavier's life. Although I should agree with him to finish his curiosity right here, right now.

"Well, I can't remember parts of what happened that day. However, it can possibly be because I may have accidentally hit my head somewhere," Awkwardly answered his question trying to finish off everything on a good note.

"You know, Xavier. Lying can never be in your forte. I have already figured everything out before you can even be a part of Utopia," again caught off guard because of his response to my answer.

"The body is a shell, and two persons are sharing one core. Do you get what I am saying?" Although it seems that I kinda understand what he was trying to say. I pretended to feign ignorance as to what he wanted to tell me.

"Stop twisting your sentences because hearing complicated things like that is hurting my ears. You kept on beating around the bush. Just tell me everything in the simplest way you can," I responded to what he had stated while trying to change the flow of the conversation.

"There will always be a lot of people who can never realize what you have been suffering all along without being attentive to what you are. However, you can never fool the eyes and instinct of a psychiatrist," his answer was filled with surprise.

Not even once did I expect that Abe had a professional job. Although he might have hinted to us about what his life was before being imprisoned here. He clearly did not mention anything about being a licensed psychiatrist. And out of the blue, he suddenly told me one thing about himself again.

And here, the thought entered my mind if he was a psychiatrist in the past. Then maybe I can consult the situation that Xavier and I both are currently experiencing.

"What! You're a psychiatrist?" I asked with a hint of surprise and a faint rumbling sound in my voice.

"Shh! Don't be so loud because not everyone knows my job in the past," Abe responded, telling me to lessen my voice.

"Then tell me, what have you observed about me? Because if you probably know my illness, then you can determine what mischief I'm suffering." I answered, trying to test him.

"Hey, I'm a psychiatrist, not a fortune-teller. However, I know that you are suffering from the psychological illness DID. And from the looks of it, you already know what illness is that. I have always known your background because I did some research about you also. So when I asked you about yourself when you first came here, I was well aware of your situation. But I still needed to undergo a behavioral test to prove my observation." He responded while explaining how he knew about Xavier's mental disorder.

"What! When did that test happen?" Shocked, I raised my voice unintentionally.

"Actually, it's not exactly a test that you need to take through handwritten. The behavioral test is observing the behavioral pattern that you show using various bases to serve as guidelines. Because of that, I was able to tell that something is different about you. I don't have to fill you with every detail, but I just wanted you to know that if you need someone to consult with, tell me because I am free of charge."He offered his assistance.

Amazing, this is the only word that I have in mind to describe how Abe knew about the secret that Xavier and I have. Psychiatrists sure do have jaw-dropping ways to show off their skills. Maybe because it's my first time to encounter someone with this kind of career. Speaking of a psychiatrist, I think that a psychiatrist can perform hypnotherapy.

Perfect timing, I could ask him to perform hypnotherapy, so I can communicate with Xavier's sleeping personality.

"Abe, if you're a psychiatrist, then you know how to perform hypnotherapy?" I questioned, hoping to have the answer that I expected.

"Well, I have experienced performing hypnotherapy for a lot of my patients. So I am quite confident with my skills in conducting that certain therapy. Besides, why did you suddenly ask about hypnotherapy? No, let me guess first. Something happened to the other personality, am I right?`` The answer that he gave me is exactly what I wanted.

How come that I haven't told him the situation, but he already knew what was happening? Although I think that this mental disorder is a rare case, he might have encountered someone with the same case as mine. Thankfully, it saves me the trouble to explain why I need hypnotherapy.

Wouldn't it be weird for me to ask for hypnotherapy from someone close to me? It doesn't hurt to try asking, right?

"It's astounding how a psychiatrist can determine a patient's problem just by observing their behavioral pattern. Since you already know what problem I have, can you perform hypnotherapy towards me? If you need to know the reason, it has been three years since Xavier, which is the dominant personality, last resurfaced. And knowing that you're a psychiatrist, you know how dangerous that is." I responded while I requested him to perform hypnotherapy against me.

"Actually, it is not allowed for a psychiatrist to perform any kind of treatment to a patient who has a personal relationship with the one who'll treat the patient. It is based on the code of ethics that I have been the law for us psychiatrists. And although as much as I want to, it is a crime to treat without a medical license," he carefully explained why he cannot perform hypnotherapy for me.

"My license was revoked, and you probably know what happened that got it invalidated, right? There is still a way for me to have my license again, although it may take some time. A revoked license cannot be reinstated or renewed after being invalidated. However, a psychiatrist can apply for a new license to regain licensure," he added to his response.

"What! How many years did you study just to earn that license?" I didn't mean to yell, but because of misjudgment. Abe needs to return back to zero just to earn back his license.

"It'll take me half a year or a year to take the licensure exam. So mind me asking, how many years are still left in your sentence?" He responded and asked me about my sentence.

"Three years had passed, so probably around twelve more years," when I answered his question. He was shocked to hear that I still have a long time before I can finish the sentence.

"That's a lot of time but don't worry. Once I successfully pass the licensure exam, I'll make sure to treat you and perform hypnotherapy on you. Although it is against the rules of the code of ethics. Consider it as my way of expressing my gratitude. Alright, I think I have disturbed your rest. So Imma leave you in here and tell the others not to approach you in here," finally, it took us about twenty minutes just talking with each other.

Abe is such a nice guy, I wonder what will happen to him after everything. I know that it's not in my place to be worried about them, my only wish for them is that I hope they can live peacefully outside of this hell. No matter what happens, I'll make everything work in the name of Xavier.

When Abe left, I was left all alone in Utopia. Twelve more years until I finish the sentence allotted to me. It sucks that Xavier spent his twenties inside this prison without even having the chance to graduate as a student. However, no need to burst the bubble worrying about things like that because I have a good feeling that I'll be released much sooner than I can expect.

Damn Abe, he kept on chatting with me and my fatigue suddenly was gone. And now I can't sleep because of him, so much for a minute of hard-earned rest. I don't have anything to do, so I'll probably just catch some air outside. Plus doing that would also be keeping watch of Mazuko and his men, so it's like killing two birds with one stone.

-At the yard-

Not many people are here outside so they're probably in the canteen. Finally, I can rest in peace.