The Misadventures of a Perpetual Bridesmaid

"Auntie! Aunt Val! You have a package!" A high-pitched voice of my young nephew called out from downstairs.

This was it. It was here.

I got up from my desk in my room with a sigh and made my way downstairs. With five bedrooms upstairs, it only made sense that the living room and kitchen were huge. It was a definite upgrade from the two-bedroom apartment I used to share with my college mates. The only downside?

"Aunt Val!" The yelling continued, this time with harmony from his siblings.

I wasn't alone in a big house like this was the downside. It's my dad's house, meaning it was opened to my many siblings at any given time. Case in point, my sister is also living here. With her three children. And her husband. If that wasn't enough, my brother also occupied a room at casa de Eastwood. The Eastwood residence was never empty. It's a revolving door of siblings who can't get their life together. Including me.

A small hand grabbed my fingers and started to drag me to the coffee table in the living room. On it, sat a package.

I glared at the thing. Why did it have to come on a Saturday? It couldn't wait and be Monday's problem? Our post office must be working overtime for it to arrive so soon.

Three pairs of eyes were also staring at the box, but in excitement. They were eager for me to open the box for no other reason than they think that it's a gift. They weren't wrong, but they weren't right either.

"What are you staring at?" My oldest nephew at 8, Bradley, had asked. He peered up at me while letting go of my hand.

I sat on the couch. "Nothing in particular."

"Open it! Open it!" My younger two nephews started to chant. Mikey was 6 and Jimmy was 4. They didn't care about my attitude towards the box. They just knew it was a package from the mailman and that it might hold some goodies for them.

"What is with all the racket?" My older sister, Veronica, walked in from the backyard. "I thought you boys were bugging your dad. How did it become Aunt Val?"

Bradley jumped up and down. "Auntie got a package. We want to know what's inside!"

"Yeah!" The younger two echoed.

I sat in the middle with a package in front of me. "V, can you get me a knife or scissors to open this?"

"You don't have to open it in front of the boys, if you don't want to." She told me as she got a knife from the kitchen, then brought it over to our small party at the coffee table. She handed it over. "It's not going to be something inappropriate, is it?"

I held the knife securely, slicing the tape along the creases of the box. "Nope. I'm positive it'll have something for the boys too."

"Oh? Who's it from?" She peeked at the label, checking the sender. "Karina? Your friend from college? Isn't she in Florida now? Why is she sending you a package from 2,500 miles away?"

I opened the box and confetti exploded up in the air, sprinkling over me and my family, along with the furniture and floor. Fantastic. My lips twitched as the boys all laughed. They picked up the confetti and started to throw it in the air repeatedly.

My sister stared at me, bewildered. "What the heck was that?"

I cleared the confetti inside the box, pulling out the card. Without even looking, I handed it over to Veronica.

She read it aloud. "I found my man, so now I'm looking for my ladies. Val, will you be my bridesmaid?" Veronica's eyes widened as she looked from the card to me and then back again. "You're going to be a bridesmaid? Again?"

My eye twitched. Bridesmaid. Again. "It's not like I can say no..." I started to pull out the mini chocolates and passed them out to the boys. "Make sure you guys throw your trash away."

"Yes, Auntie!" They chorused together and ran off with the sweets.

My sister watched as I pulled out a kimono robe. "Does she know that you're already a bridesmaid for Brittany's wedding?"

I nodded. "She does. Not like that matters to her. She picked a fall date so it won't coincide."

"Wow." She watched as I pulled out a carefully wrapped coffee mug. She busted out laughing after reading the printed 'Bridesmaid'. "Don't you have one of these with a matching shot glass?"

I pulled out the matching shot glass. "It's a set. Very common."

She laughed. "I believe it! You've only been a bridesmaid twice, with two more to go, and you already have duplicate gifts? What kind of bad luck is this?"

My lips twitched. "At least the kimono robe is a different design. I made sure to tell her what kinds I already have. As for everything else? Well...she's the bride. She gets what she wants. Plus, her other bridesmaids haven't been one before, so these kinds of gifts are unique to them." I sighed and leaned back into the comfy cushions of the couch, not bothered by the confetti everywhere. "I'm going to be so broke this year. Why can't I have more single friends?"

My sister laughed. "It's because YOU are the single friend."

I threw a cushion at her head, catching her by surprise. "Shut up. I'm not a bridesmaid because I'm single. I'm a bridesmaid because I have too many friends."

She really started to crack up. "You don't even have ten friends. It's just the friends you do have, are so quick to get married after college with their college sweethearts. So cute, but also, so dumb."

"Says the girl who got married at nineteen." I threw another cushion at her, making even more of a mess with the confetti.

"It worked out for me!" She ran away from my attacks. "You don't have to take your anger out on me. It's not my fault your friends keep getting married. So close together too." She started to laugh again. "I can't wait to tell everyone. You're like that girl from that movie! 27 dresses!"

"Don't jinx me!" I hollered from my spot on the couch. I couldn't imagine being a bridesmaid that many times. At that point, someone better pay me for my services.