5 chapter 4– lost hope

The morning never felt so empty and dull, so void of emotion. Dread tugging at every person in the room, hoping to see the familiar, mocha face.

But it never comes. For the whole week, it's silent. Walking to lockers feels like it's something that should be done with another person.

Chatting and eating should be done with the third person.

Riding in the red beetle should have the familiar person sitting in the passenger side.

No one talks for a week, no one dares to utter her name and no one dares to fill her place in classrooms.

Akiyah Blanca. She's been missing for a week and no one knows how to handle the news. Others that knew her have thrown a fit and others have silently kept to themselves.

But the people that are hurt the most are her two close friends, Sabrina and Amanda. They've thrown fits, they've cried, they've kept to themselves and they've found their way back to each other.

The feeling of someone missing lingers over them and the sympathetic looks doesn't help them either. They've gone over to her house but her parents look more distressed than the two of them combined.

"We don't know where she went or if she's safe. We didn't even hear the door open but I'm sure she'll come back. She always does."

Akiyah's mother sobs into her husband's shoulder, feeling like she's failed on keeping her safe.

"She will come back. She always does." That's what Sabrina has been saying to herself for a week, speaking it like a mantra and trying to comfort Amanda but everytime she does, it's a futile attempt.

"She left." Amanda would mumble during class, disturbing some of the student's near her.

Toby tried to comfort her but he only managed to make her smile, the tiniest smile he'd ever seen her smile.

"Lets go have lunch. My treat." She nods to the suggestion and together they walk to the diner, settling into the humid place.

One of the waiters notice her and give her a barely there squeeze on the shoulder.

"Take the rest of the week off. You need it." Amanda can only nod, uttering words not in her agenda. Toby pulls the chair back and pushing it in once she's settled in.

"Would you like coffee or cappuccino?" She holds up to fingers and Toby can only guess she means cappuccino.

"Can we have a cup of cappuccino, black coffee and four cream cheese croissants. Thank you."

Amanda, at loss of words, looks up to attempt to say thank you to the boy that sits across her but he holds his hand up.

"No need to say anything, just sit with me and give the company that I need." She nods and sits silently, fiddling with her fingers.

"You know, we could look for her. Think of possible places that she could've gone to."

"We could." The dryness of her throat makes her voice crack a bit, the silent plea of something to sooth it evidently makes itself known.

"Mh, we could."

They sit in silence, the chatter that roams around the diner fills in the necessary words, the glow of the orange bulbs sets a feel of home. Although Amanda feels otherwise.

She doesn't feel the aura that they try to give off because Akiyah isn't here to make it whole.

Their food arrives much later, to their dismay, and both of them dig into their food. Amanda has always been close to the missing girl but now she feels like she doesn't know her anymore.

She feels like she missed something.

"Toby, take me home please." He only nods and helps her to her feet.

They leave the warm diner and step into the cold outside, the clouds darkening by the second.

Across the street she sees a woman walking her dog, wondering how she could be doing that during a time like this. Yet again, she doesn't know what's happening around her, oblivious to her surroundings.

Like the rest of the world is, going through one thing or another, we are all oblivious to the things that stick out like sore thumbs. Begging to be noticed and we sit idly, watching as they suffer through.

Toby had left his car parked at the diner, hoping there will be day like this.

"Lets go." The walk to his car is silent, deafening silence. The clouds rumble, wanting a release, wanting to be released like a caged bird.

It chirps but no one hears.

They enter into the old car, hearing a creak as the doors open. The inside is the same as the outside, old but keeping itself up.

"I hope you feel better, don't let this get to you."

She scoffs at the absurdity.

"Don't let this get to me? Akiyah is my best friend and I consider her my sister. Of course I'll let this get to me because I did nothing!"

Her chest constricts at the prospect of it all. How she could've helped.

"No one there to help her and the signs were there but I never got to help her because I was oblivious! Fucking oblivious!"

Toby holds her in his large arms, rubbing her back soothingly as though that's the only way he knows how to comfort her.

Perhaps it is but Amanda can't think that's the only way he knows how. She needs the comfort and he can only provide.

Only he can.

°•°•°

Sabrina hasn't been herself lately, and not only because of her friend missing but because of something she's dreading.

Something that only fate can control.

She scoffs at her idiosyncracy, how fate can take its course.

"You need to calm down." Hendrik had eventually came but a day later.

The last time she had seen Akiyah she seemed fine but she was ready to talk to her. However, fate took its course and now she's distressed about everything.

"Calm down, Hendrik?! How can you ask that of me, let alone tell me to calm down! You don't know how bad this is. If she's found..."

Hendrik doesn't let her finish the thought, the clenching fear of how that may be possible. He won't allow her to go that far, letting her mind run wild with all the 'what ifs'.

"She's safe and secure wherever she is, hopefully, she will come back. She wouldn't try to run away, would she?"

Sabrina shakes her head in disagreement.

"What if she didn't run? What if someone took her?"

Gripping her shoulders forcefully, making her wince slightly. He loosens once he has her attention.

"We will find her and once we do, we will help her this time. Together." He stares into her honey green eyes, an unusual colour but only she can make it seem natural.

"We will find her."

°•°•°

The following week doesn't seem to be any better than the previous. People are starting to talk, dotting on the possibilities of what could've happened.

People don't seem to know boundaries until someone stands up and tells them to move along. Still, they whisper the secrets that they know they shouldn't utter. Most varsity students are like that, incompetent.

They think they know everything that goes on around the campus. When in actual fact, they know nothing and no one knows anything. It's how we learn and how we grow.

"You know, we could go to her house and check for any clues or something. We can't sit here and do nothing."

Toby nods his head subtly, agreeing with Amanda's idea. This has brought the four of them closer, communicating and learning from Akiyah's disappearance.

"I agree but do you think her parents will budge? They're wailing and grieving and us going there might bring unnecessary trouble."

"What sort of trouble, Hendrik?" Amanda has been harsher than before, even with her gentle self, she seems to be more aggressive than usual. She's more agitated than the rest of them.

Thoughts of what could've happened to Akiyah run wild in her head, not helping her sleep peacefully at night. However, she can't think of sleep when she doesn't know if her friend is okay.

Before Sabrina could dispute the rising tension, her phone buzzes in her pocket.

A message from an unknown number shows up on her screen, puzzling her.

I have Akiyah with me.

The message shocks her and slightly panicked.

Don't tell anyone and just follow my instructions.

"What's wrong?" Hendrik's voice makes her jump in her place, not intentionally scaring the rest.

"What's up with you?" Sabrina is used to Amanda's harshness but she feels inclined to tell her this at least.

"Could you come with me, please?"

Never in her life had she thought she'd hear Sabrina plead, but she's taken back by her sudden change of mood. She knows she should trust her but since Akiyah's disappearance, she's withdrawn herself from others, only confiding in Toby.

"Okay." Sabrina leaves her phone under a heap of books. It could damage the phone but that's the least of her worries.

"What's going on?" They stand a good meter away from the boys.

"I just received a message. It says 'I have Akiyah with me and don't tell anyone'."

It takes a while for Amanda to process what Sabrina just said, arms folded and walls rising higher than they ever have.

"Do you know who sent you the message?" Gritting her teeth, her face void of emotion and her body tense, allows her to express what's happening inside her head.

Anger. Anger is all she feels.

"No, it's an unknown number. We need to find the location and perhaps we will find her, alive." Sabrina crosses her fingers as she says the last part, breathing in air that's needed in her lungs.

Her chest constricts and she feels a headache making itself known. The blur image of Amanda stands in front of her, swaying left and right.

She stumbles over and lands in Amanda's arms, thankful that she isn't facing the floor.

"Hendrik!"

The last thing she hears before she feels herself sleep, or what she thinks she's  doing.

Amanda stares down at her body, the colour draining and her hands feel colder than the room feels. Amanda can't lose her yet, she's already lost her friend.

"Hendrik! Call 911!" She holds onto her body, cradling it in between her arms.

"You'll be fine. You're going to be okay." She whispers softly, tears streaming down her face.

To anyone, the image of her cradling her friend and crying may seem artistic or somewhat portraying a message but they wouldn't know the pain that Amanda Stevenson feels.

The pain.

The tears.

The loss.

The loss of probably losing both her friends, and she wasn't there to help either of them.

What a disappointment, a shame that she couldn't be the hero for either of the girls.

"Ma'am, we need to take her to the hospital." She looks up to see that she's surrounded by the hero's that will save Sabrina.

She shuffles away from her body, gently placing her head on the cold, tiled floor.

The morning never seemed so dull but at that moment, all she saw was grey.

°•°•°