8 chapter 7

"Nov?" I heard Zane call out to me in a soft voice, and then I felt him sit on my bed. I turn back over.

"What time is it?"

"10." I lay back on the pillow.

"Can't I just go back to sleep?"

"I and my dad kinda make breakfast."

"What kind?" I sat up and looked at him.

"Chocolate Chip Pancakes."

"Bet!" I said jumping out of bed.

"I knew that would get you up." He smiled. I rolled my eyes and went towards the stairs.

"I should warn you, even if they told me not."

"Rose, Stella, Blossom, Kai, Nash, Adele, and Nessa are all downstairs."

"I've got to get dressed before I have breakfast." I groaned loudly.

"I mean, you look good, now. Just thought I warn you."

"Thanks for the warning, Z," I said, deciding that I would just see them in my PJs. I trotted down the stairs and went to the left, and opened the swiping door towards the large kitchen.

Beautiful. I thought when I first saw it, "This kitchen is prettier than me." I choked.

"Not possible!" Rose said, chewing on a pancake.

"Mr. Gordon, these pancakes are good as fuck." "Thank you, Rosalie but I've told you a million times to just call me Simon."

"And I've told you a million times to call me Rose." I walk up to the middle island counter and sit down next to Rose.

"Hey." She said, smiling.

"Hey, Rose," I said, giving a tight-lip smile back to her. She was already dressed, looking gorgeous, but I figure that's a normal thing for her.

She was wearing a gold floral crop top with a 2-inch thick strap on her shoulders, light blue jeans with a 2 thing belts one with hearts and the other with small flowers on them, and yellow converses, and she was also wearing a silver chain with a pink rose on it.

"That's a pretty necklace, Rose," I told her.

"Yeah, Nash got it for me for my birthday, last month." She said twirling the necklace in her fingers

"Nash has a good taste in jewelry."

"Well, my Aunt Marget helped me pick out for her but basically I am the best." Rose rolled her eyes, taking another bite of pancakes that were smothered in syrup.

Nash was now pouring himself a glass full of orange juice, he was wearing dark blue jeans and a white champion shirt, and white Nike air forces.

"Aren't you not supposed to cross-brand?" I asked him.

"I usually don't but all of my Nike shirts are dirty and champion shoes suck, so for today, I am." Nova rolled her eyes, and got up, and poured herself a cup of apple juice.

"Where are the glasses," I whisper to Nash, and he laughed, opening the cabinet above me.

"Thanks," I told him and grabbed it from his hand.

"You really are clueless, huh?" Nash asked him.

"I've barely seen any parts of his house, I've been here less than 24 hours, Nash. So, I'm pretty damn clueless.

"Here, Nova," Simon said, placing a pancake down on my plate.

"Clueless is such a good movie." Blossom raved. I smiled at her, it was a pretty good movie. I grab the syrup and make a medium size puddle of it moving it around.

"Clueless is a pretty good movie." I agreed with Blossom, she was wavy, I guess from sleeping on her straight hair, and she was wearing a long-sleeve white shirt and white and black skirt with a slit slip up the side and a gold necklace with blossom spelled out, Kai like usual was standing beside her.

She had hair in a low pony, a large Tupac shirt on, jean shorts, and black converses on.

Stella walks from the other room, she wears a dark pink crop top with strawberries all over it, a light pink jacket, and jeans with small diamond studs.

"I have the perfect idea!" Rose exclaimed, Zane came in and sat down next to me, and took a bite of my already cut up pancake.

I rolled my eyes at Zane, "What's your idea?"

"Movie night, everybody's favorite movie of all time, tomorrow?"

"Yeah, we can do it in the theater room," Zane said, popping another piece of my pancake his mouth.

"We have a theater room?"

"Like I said clueless," Nash said, reaching over to take a piece of pancake but Zane hit his hand away.

"Not for you." I laughed. "And yeah, Nov. We've got a theater room, it's a part of the basement."

"We have a basement?"

"Yes." He said.

"Here ya go, Zane," I said to him, giving him the rest of my pancake.

"Oh, thank you!" He said.

"Where's Vanessa?"

"I'm in here just too lazy to get up and go in there." I shrugged.

"You wanna come to the mall with us, Nova?" Stella asked me.

"Uh, sure."

"Maybe, we can get that hair of yours fixed," Kai said.

"Don't be mean to my hair. It was a poorly lit gas station."

"Oo, we could get some stripper outfits!" I was taken back, me as a stripper? I couldn't. The front door slammed shut.

"Oh, sorry, Simon!" Adele yelled as she walked into the kitchen, her black hair was pushed out of her face by a headband, she was wearing a jean jacket, a red dress with flowers all over the dress, and white shoes.

"Sorry, I'm late!"

"We're used to Adele," Nash said, smiling at her, Adele rolled her eyes at Nash.

"I'm gonna go get dressed." I announced, "As Jupiter." I said I could taste disgusted in my voice.

"Who's Jupiter?" Stella asked.

"My Alter-ego," I told Stella to get up to leave.

I walk back up the stairs to 'my' room, and into my closet picking out what I should wear.

I saw a yellow dress with buttons, and it's a low cut, I put it on, It was really cute actually. I know if I had my normal hair back, I'd put it in a low ponytail and put it on the slide but with my hair being as short as it is, I kinda can't do that.

So I just combed through my hair with my brush, and that's when it hit me. I needed to brush my teeth and I didn't have one.

"Zane," I call out to Zane again.

"Yes?" He called from the end of the stairs.

"Do you guys have any extra toothbrushes?" I smiled.

"Top right of the cabinet." I nodded like he could see me, which he could not.  I walked up to the cabinet and tried to get on the top shelf.

"Here," Zane said from behind me, opening the cabinet, he started laughing.

"Shut up."

"You're really short."

"I might be short but I could kill you in two seconds."

"Please, I could stop you faster than that," I smirked.

"I'll hold you too," I said sticking out my hand to get my toothbrush.

"You look pretty, by the way." He said to me as he left.

"Shut up," I said shaking my head, going back to brushing my teeth.

What was I doing, flirting with Zane? I don't even know if I like him, am I even over Leo? Too many questions that I don't have the question too but what I do know is.

Zane is sweet, and maybe too good for me but I never liked some too good for me, maybe I should give that a chance.

I rinsed my mouth out with water, I looked in the mirror, I looked fine, not quite Jupiter through.

I walked back in my room, and I grabbed these white heels, they're only like 2 inches and I put them on, and went to the nightstand, and opened the small drawer, I opened it and saw the necklace with a silver J on it. I put it on, and grabbed mascara from my backpack, and started to apply it to my eyes looking into the mirror in my closet.

I looked into the mirror again, and I pushed my double D boobs, they looked fine, I grabbed my white Micheal Kors large leather purse, and in the mirror.

"You look really pretty!" I turned over to see Adele standing in the door,

"Right back at you," I said, putting on a fake open lipped smile.

"You look pretty but why are you trying to be something you aren't?" I sighed sitting down on my bed.

"I have too." I flatly said, Adele walked around and jumped on the bed.

"Why?"

"Okay, you might not get this but," I paused. "A few backs, my mom and dad sat us down, and told us we need to come up with another identity, in case he and mom ever get put in prison and we need to go on the run."

"Oh, so that's why you dyed your hair in a gas station bathroom."

"Basically." She put her hand on my shoulder.

"What's your 'alter-ego' name?" She asked.

"Jupiter Fields." Adele let out a loud laugh.

'How did you come up with that." I shrugged, I know how I did. Jupiter because of the planet, my father's personal favorite planet, and Fields was Leo's last name and it's too late to change it now. So, Jupiter Fields. "Well, she looked at me."

"You definitely don't look like a kick-ass, murdering a teenage girl in that dress," Adele said.

I laughed at her comments about me grabbing the purse and getting the small backpack, and I stuffed my wallet into the purse and I stuffed 2 wads of 100's in the purse.

"Let's go!" I smiled.

~~~~~~~~

We were walking through the mall, "Let's go in here." Rose said, wiggling her eyebrows, dragging me into Victoria's Secret.

"Yeah. We're gonna go." Zane said, turning back and I scrunch my face.

"You can't just feed me to the wolves like this."

"Bye, Nov!" he yelled over his shoulder to me. I sighed and just let Rose push me into the store.

Honestly, I didn't like places like this.

"I hate places like this."

"Why you've got something against panties and bras," Stella said.

"No, not with the product. Their advertisement, they are just selling unbelievable beauty and body standards, and that also adds people with body imaging problems too."

"Never really thought of it like that," Rose said.

"I mean, Rose, no offense but you look just like that girl up there," Adele said, pointing at the stunning blonde girl.

"I look nothing like her," Rose said, doing the same pose at her.

Everyone laughed.

"Oh, N- Jupiter what do you think about this?" Nessa said holding up a white lace bra and underwear set.

"I doubt they have that size."

"Jupiter, I know a store where bigger girls can shop for these things," Adele said. Leading me across the mall, to a store called, "Megs."

I walked into the store and it had nothing but plus size clothing,

"Come with me," Adele said, grabbing my hand. She went behind in sparkly pink curtains, and there was everything from normal underwear to full latex suits.

"I don't think we need that." I pointed at the full leather suit.

"Yeah. This is where I tend to stay." She said going more to the pretty and more type you'd wear as a stripper or in the bedroom.

"To be honest with you, Adele. I have no idea what I'd even wear."

"Just a little everything, and find out what you like." She shrugged, I looked at everything.

There were lacey things, and just plain, there were costumes, things everything color. I felt Jasmin when she was on the flying carpet, a whole new world.

A whole new stripper world.

I picked up a simple lace bra and panties set, it was pink, it was pretty.

"That's pretty," Adele said. I nodded my head, I kept looking and found a purple thong and a purple bra that would go over only after my boob and my nipple would probably slip out but it's cute and Adele said to try one of everything.

I grabbed this black underwear that would go high up on my waist but it was cut out and criss-cross pattern all the way down, and the bra did the same thing on the back and side of the bra.

"I think this is good," I said holding up things I had in my hands.

"Alright, let's go check out." We walked out of the room, and the rest of the girls were in the store wandering around.

I finally saw Vanessa, and she was wearing a lime green and plaid crop top and buttoned up and a thick black belt and mom jeans.

"Now, we have to get you some shoes," Stella said to us, while we were checking out.

"I can't walk in 12-inch heels, and spin on a pole?"

"We'll teach you, girl!" Blossom said, pulling my arm.

"Where are the boys?" I questioned, maybe they could help me out.

"They don't like underwear shopping with us," Rose answered. I paid the money, to the women, and we left.

"We also have to get your nails down, Jupiter! Oh, please." Vanessa pleaded.

"After we get shoes!" Stella said Vanessa rolled her eyes.

"Okay, we'll take a vote," Vanessa said standing in front of us.

"All for getting all of our nails down, raise your hand." Personally would rather get my nails done, than do this. So I raised my hand along with Adele, Blossom, and Rose.

"I honestly could care less, I just want to do something," Kai said.

We went to the nail place, we walked into the place.

"Yes, this is our friend's first time getting her nails done with acrylics. Also can we please get a mani-pedi." I heard Vanessa say, she turned around smiling from ear to ear.

"Okay, girls, let's sit in our seats." I walk over to the recliner things in nail places that you sit in when you're getting there.

"Go pick a color." The women told us.

"We got this one for you, Jups." Rose said getting up and going to the nail polish, all 6 girls looked at me and then back at the colors.

"Relax, please." The woman told me, I smiled at her, and slid back in my seat and let them do whatever they wanted to me.

~~~~~~~

About an hour and a half later, I sat up and looked at my acrylic nails, they were coffin-shaped, according to Nessa and Rose that is.

Both my nails on my fingers and my toes were pale pink, and they said, they were my color. I don't know what my color was, so I didn't have any reason to not go with pale pink.

They were pretty and matched the color of the underwear I bought back at the stores.

"Now, shoes?" Stella yelped happily. She was walking outside the store, tripping slightly on her own feet, but quickly gaining her balance back,

"She does trip on air."

"Hey, at least I don't trip on stage, Rose." Stella checked on her dark pink nails.

"That was one time four years ago, Stell," Rose said moving her sky blue nails through her pink hair.

"Who else is hungry," Kai called to us, attempting to pull up her pants with freshly painted black nails.

"Babe, we need to get Jup some shoes, then we'll get your food. I promise." Blossom said, caressing Kai's face with the back of her hand nearly poking out Kai's eye with her extremely long white nails.

"I'm hungry too, who wants to go to the food court and then get shoes."

"Actually, I'm starving." Stella agreed. We all went to the food court.

"Chinese food," I said, walking over to the counter.

"Fuck yeah," Vanessa said.

"Can I get some noodles, rice, and chicken and 2 wontons and 3 eggrolls." She said with a smile, and the man smiled back at her.

I felt a hand on my shoulder, and I grabbed the arm and twisted but only a little bit not wanting to break their arm.

I turn around to see Zane, "Oh, oops." he grabbed my hand, his palm almost touching the still wet paint on my nails.

"You fucked my fresh nails, I'll fuck up that pretty face of yours," I told him and grabbed my hand back.

"Did you just call my face pretty?" Zane asked, I turned around.

"Yeah, hi, Can I get the same as hers," I said fake smiling, and he nods making the plate and going all the way down to the counter. Zane was smiling at me from ear to ear, and I couldn't help but really smiling back at him.

"Do you want a drink?"

"Lemonade, please."

"Can you take any longer." I heard a young man say from behind me.

"I'm about to be done if you just let me pay," I told the 13-year-old boy.

"Shit, do you even need all that. I mean, look at you." Nessa stood beside me and rolled her eyes.

"How about you shut up, and mind your fucking business." She told the boy.

"Awe, good thing you eating something looks like you need it more than she does." We both rolled our eyes at the little boy, and I placed down a $20 bill on the counter, grabbed the lemonade, and opened it up, and poured it on his head.

"Awe, got nothing left to say," I said, throwing the bottle on his chest and walking away.

"I can't believe that 11-year-old just body-shamed you," Vanessa said.

"He body-shamed both of us." Vanessa looked confused, we both sat down. "You can be body shamed for being too skinny, Nessa."

"You can?"

"That's what just happened." Adele and Kai both came and sit down with their build your own burrito.

"Well, Thanks for standing for me."

"Of course. Boys are stupid, especially tiny boys." 

Rose and Nash came back with burgers on their plate, and then I felt the chair next to me move and it was Zane with a new bottle of Lemonade.

"Mm, thanks," I said to him, grabbing it and opening the lid.

"Of course." He said.

"Where's Blossom and Stella?" Kai asked.

"I think they are over getting pizza," and like magic, Blossom and Stella sat down with their pizza.

We all started to joke around with each other, and talk, and then I realized. I wasn't faking my smile anymore.

~~~~~~~~

I walked in holding like 20 shopping bags full of everything from regular clothes, to 5-inch heels, to the lingerie I bought, Zane was carrying in like 5 more.

"C'mon hurry up," Zane said, and I started to skip steps up to my room.

"Zane, I can't even open the fucking door." Zane goes to open the door and turn on the light. I walk in and see my name in black block letters on the farthest wall, I look up to see green stars on my ceiling, a see a bookshelf with 5 books on it in the corner, I see pictures that were in my back now taped up above my bed, and I see bright yellow fairy-lights across everything inch of the ceiling.

I look at Zane, and I drop my bags, and I hug him. He was the only one who I told all these things too, the only one who knew.

He wrapped his arms around me, embracing me in a hug back.

"Thank you, so much." I said, "No one has ever done something so nice for me." I said, unwrapping my arms from him.

"I knew you missed home, and your old room so I figured why not bring a little home back to you." I smiled up at him, and I turned off the light and laid back in the middle of my bed, Zane on the other side, my feet dangling off as I stared at the glow in the dark stars, and felt at peace.

"Thank you!" I said again, sitting up, Zane smiled again, a beautiful smile he did have. He leaned to me and leaned back.

"Zane, I can't." The sweet smile on his face went down and his face now creased with concern.

"What? Did I do something wrong?"

"It's not you, Zane. It's the fact that I barely know you, I just got here last night."

"I guess, I felt something that-"

"I feel it too." I sighed.

"I'll leave."

"No, wait," I said, grabbing his hand, I guess this is as good as time as any. "Zane, I can't get into anything right now because of my ex, Leo."

"What does he have anything to do with us? Don't use your ex as an excuse for not wanting to be with me." His tone now filled with rage.

"I-"

"Save it, Nov." He said, slamming my door shut, and that's when I started to sob.

Even in death, Leo is somehow ruining my life.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

After putting my clothes up, and blaring music in my headphones. A few hours had passed, it was now 11 I lay in bed staring at the ceiling.

I grab my lighter and cigarettes and go on the balcony, in nothing but a large t-shirt. I heard the door creak open and expecting it was Simon,

"Nova?" I heard Zane's voice, it was it's normal sweet and gentle tone. "I'm sorry." I turned around to face him, he sat on the bed, where my hips were laying. "I shouldn't have spoken to you like that."

"You're right, you shouldn't have," I said shivered, it was colder out here than I thought. I heard the door creak again, and thinking, I just pushed him away even more, but then for the third time, the door creaked and it was Zane, with a fuzzy blanket.

I took it and put over my legs, "thanks." I mumbled.

"Nova." He started, "A lot of girls have used me in the past, they were using me, or they cheated on me, and it was horrible but that is no excuse for treating you like that." I nodded my head, taking a long drag.

"Like I was saying before you snapped at me." I started to unfold the pages of my story to him, I know it hasn't been long but there was a connection between Zane and I and all of his, no, our friends. "Leo, I dated him since I was 12, we were together for 4 years and I was in love with him. How couldn't I be, he was everything to me. My first love, my first time, my first boyfriend. I can't really tell you when things started to go bad." I sighed, I was leaning over the chair, my elbows pressed on my thighs, and a cigarette, in my hand. "Actually, it all started on our 3rd year anniversary, Leo had seemed more distant and was acting cold towards me, I don't know when he started the verbal abuse, but it started to get physical shortly after our anniversary, it started with him slapping me during a stupid argument, then every time something went bad or I said something wrong, he'd punch and kick me. No one knew and by the time our 4th year came around, I broke up with him. I'd had enough, I was a Michaels' was tough and strong, I thought I was strong enough to handle it but I wasn't, we broke up, and he snitched on my entire family. Told the Feds everything they wanted to hear, made up a few lies, and didn't tell them about the beatings. My parents found out about him beating me, and the snitching and got someone to take care of the problem and sometimes." I paused, taking another hit. "I wonder, if I would have just been strong enough if I would have just been able to change him back to the Leo I fell in love with, maybe everything would be the same, my mother would still be alive, my family would still be back together but it didn't work that way did it." I didn't mention the miscarriage or the fact of who killed him.

"Nov, none of that was your fault." I felt tears in my eyes.

"And it's not that I don't like you, I do like you or what I know about you and it's just I need some time to be out of a relationship and to find out who I am outside of somebody's girlfriend." Zane caressed my cheek with his hand.

"You truly are an amazing woman," Zane said, kissing my cheek. "And take as much time as you need, Nov. I'll wait."

I smiled at him and brought him for a hug. Zane wasn't a boy, was he? He was a man.

I walk back to my room and turn off the fairy lights and I look up,

The glow in dark stars stared back at me, as my thoughts were filled with ideas of new adventures and new friends and of Zane. 

I smiled as I feel into a deep sleep,