36 Sorry, I don't have any change

"It hurts... It really hurts... Please... Someone... Please help me..."

Her chest hurt so much, it felt like someone had grabbed her heart and ripped it in two. Zhi Rou's ethereal hands clutched her chest as she lay in the darkness.

Surrounded by a pitch black void, she could not see anyone or anything. The only sounds that she could hear were her own murmurs of pain.

She could not tell how much time had passed since she arrived in the darkness, or how she got here. But the pain in her heart slowly receded, becoming a dull throb instead of a piercing pain.

Even the darkness that once was scary an cold, became warm and inviting. Away from the chaos and noise of daily life, here she had no problems. No quarreling parents, no disappointments, no expectations, only herself.

'Should I just give up? Do I really want to leave? Do I really want to go back to the people that hurt me?'

As she lay in that void for what seemed like an eternity, her will to return back home started to waiver.

With her body slowly turning more transparent, she recalled the most important moments in her life.

The feeling of picking up her first paintbrush and deciding right then that painting is what she wanted to do with her life. The time that she came home with full marks on her test to show her mom. A quiet night starring at the stars. Her life was so simple and fulfilling before she kissed those sweet, devilish lips.

No, he had bewitched her even before that kiss. It was almost as if she was entrapped by him as soon as she saw his face. The embrace when they first met, and the kiss later on only confirmed the love for him that she had already felt.

That single gimps of the side of his face is what turned her world upside down. It was magical and electrifying, but it also hurt her so much.

'Just for him, am I going to give up on my dreams?'

Her body that was disappearing before suddenly started to solidify at a speed visible to the naked eye. The pain and hurt that was in her eyes were replaced by a sharp resolve and anger. Yes, hot, boiling, anger!

Not at Julian, it was not his fault that he did not want to call her. No, she was furious at herself for believing he would, and for falling apart when he didn't.

'Where had my resolve gone? Do my dreams mean that little to me now? And what about my mother? Don't I owe it to her at least, after all that she has done for me?'

Her anger seemed to replace the love and longing that had filled her, but it was really just pushing it deep down. Down into the dark where no one would ever find it again.

Love was not that easy to get rid of, but Zhi Ruo tried to hide it out of sight and mind. The pain that she was feeling for the last eternity in the dark void was not something that she would want to repeat.

With a determination that was fulled by some unknown force, Zhi Rou gathered all her strength to stand up.

Starting with just one arm, Zhi Rou sat up for the first time since she arrived at the void.

Inch by inch, she squeezed every ounce of strength out of her incorporeal form to push herself upright.

Finally, with spiritual sweat dripping from her brow, Zhi Rou stood tall under the weight of the darkness on her shoulders.

Picking a direction, she started to walk, step by step, off into the distance.

At first, she could only manage to walk a couple of steps before she grew too week to walk. But each time she fell to the ground, unable to bear the weight anymore, her resolve to leave only intensified.

After several times she was able to walk for a hundred meters and then later she started to jog. As the number of times that she rested grew, so did the distance that she travelled each time.

When her muscles finally started to relax, and she could run for a while, a faint grey light shone in the darkness.

Like a fish out of water for too long, Zhi Rou longed to return to the light.

Her every being surged forward as she sprinted towards the ever-growing brighter light.

As she neared to the source of light her eyes started to droop, and like the day that she collapsed on the concrete, she once again fell toward the ground.

***

Stifling a yawn, an exhausted and overworked doctor stood in front of a young woman while checking the data from a large variety of machines.

Nothing had changed with her condition since she had was brought to this hospital almost three years ago, but that did not mean he could slack off. If either of those two devils found out that he was not putting his full effort into treating the little 'princess' he would likely lose his life.

While grumbling about an argument that he had with his wife earlier this morning he glanced at the fairy-like face on the bed. One of the few perks of his job was that he could glance at her for a few minutes a day.

As his eyes travelled to her normally shut eyelids, he noticed that they started to flutter.

'Thi-this... Is she finally going to wake up?'

Rushing forward he quickly called in the nurses to help him assist. The flurry of panic and professionals in the room made it seem like they were preparing for emergency surgery.

With everything in place to deal with any unexpected events that could occur when she woke up, he quickly kicked them all out again.

To try and make her moment of awakening as peaceful as possible he needed to make sure that she felt safe. A dozen people surrounding her as they asked her questions was not something that she would want when waking up two and a half years after her accident.

Of course, he would never admit that he just wanted her to see him as the person that woke her up.

With a few more flutters of her eyelashes, her eyes finally opened as she woke up.

Staring at the man before her, she uttered the first words out of her mouth in over two years before falling back unconscious.

"Sorry, I don't have any change."