Julian was pissed and when I say pissed; I MEAN PISSED!
How dare he call me his equal? How dare he label me his rival? How dare he-
[Julian, calm down, the dwarf is trying to tick you off and you're letting him do what he wants to happen; stop being such a bitch and instead channel the anger you felt into your gameplay]
(Omega, I AIN'T DEFINITELY NO BITCH!!!)
[Then don't act like one]
(Oh, you motherfucker)
While Julian was having an internal war with Omega in his mind, the sharp, crisp sound of a high pitch whistle vibrated throughout the stadium.
It was time for the corner to take place.
[Julian, instead of us arguing, why don't you instead focus on the corner, you big twat]
(Well, surprise, surprise, we've actually agreed on something, you stupid worthless system) Julian shouted back, clearly still affected by the whole situation.
And if there was anyone else who was affected by the situation; it was Micheal Owen who had been ignored for the billionth time in just a span of a minute. How tragic.
"Hello, Julian King..."
"Ummm, Mr King?..."
"Earth to Julian King..."
The sad thing was Julian didn't even realise.
This miniature dwarf is somehow marking me for a corner? When the score is tied? Are you crazy? Do you want to lose? Are you playing serious Liverpool?
I couldn't help but laugh out load when I heard that the dwarf that I had "feared" so much was marking me FOR A CORNER. I mean who would believe that, a 5'6 tramp winning a header against a 6'2 giant; well certainly not me.
"What are you laughing about?"
And then he has the nerve to ask what I'm laughing about; can his small brain not comprehend that he's going to get demolished...or maybe it's just false bravado?
"Nothing mate, was just thinking back to...uhhhhh...a joke I heard before" I replied, obviously trying hard not for the laughter to escape out of my body whether it be the ears, my nose or my mouth.
"Well, that's good then, was thinking you were scared of me" the dwarf nudged me with a stupid cocky smile on his face which did nothing but make me feel like busting out the biggest laugh in the world...but...I had to contain it...we had a corner...oh yeah we did, didn't we...
Anyways, while rustling and tussling between each other which was nothing as the former described; more like complete annihilation from me; the ball had been swerved into the box by Paul Scholes, not Beckham this time, and was seeming like it was aiming to go far wide.
(Imaginary rubbing hands)
Your boy managed to somehow do some 1080 degrees black ops spin while in the air with his eyes closed whilst listening to Baby Shark and blast the ball past the unexpected Liverpool keeper into the top corner!!!
Who was I kidding?
It was only an...
Yes! I know, right! How did I score such a beautiful and awe-inspiring goal...well, that's going to have to be saved for later on...
sorry, not sorry.