1 Send Them My Way

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This chapter is about the life of our protagonist Dean before his death and reincarnation. I will update this chapter in the future to give more information about his past life. If you want to just read after his reincarnation to another world, you can skip it and start from the second chapter.

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An old model car was speeding through the empty road. The driver inside was holding the wheel tightly with both hands so much that his knuckles were whitened because of the decreased blood flow to his hands. It was obvious that he has been in that position for a long time.

His mind was in a complete mess. In the past few days, his life was in turmoil with the revelation of the imminent death looming over him. He was informed that he had contracted a rare disease and in the near future there was only death awaiting. He went to other hospitals and doctors, but all his hopes were crushed with the reality of the situation. He didn't have much time at all, the doctor wanted him to stay in the hospital but he refused in the end.

Why would he want to spend the rest of his days confined in a bed just to live a few days longer? Wasn't he living his whole life in this city trying to make a living? He didn't even get to enjoy his life and they are telling him he's already dying? He wanted out of there immediately. So he got into his car and drove away.

His name was Dean. It's not like he didn't have a surname but he preferred to not speak about it. To him, it sounded like it was given in random. Probably it was. Since it must have been chosen by the person who prepared his paperwork for his identification. Just another disadvantage of being abandoned right after birth. He liked the name though since it was given to him by the matron of the orphanage, who took care of him in the early years of his life.

He grew up in an orphanage. He was good looking and pretty smart for a kid too. Despite his lack of a parent, he was as happy as a kid could be. Life continued on, until the day the matron of orphanage died. It was a big hit on him, probably one of the factors of him having a bit more introverted personality. Another factor was probably the bullying that came with the early teenage years. The reason? For a teenager, it wasn't important at all. They had the strength for it, so it was a reason enough for them to justify their actions.

He always did his best with his studies and was ranked at the top of his class most of the time. He also experienced love but it all fell apart when she just found a rich and handsome boy. He didn't lose with the word "handsome", not at all. Any objective person could see he was a couple of points above in that. But when it comes to money, well, he was broke. That's why he worked nonstop in his studies after all. All for a better life in the future.

But now that future was also taken from him. The future he's been working so hard just slipped through his hands.

He had a splitting headache caused by stress and lack of sleep, his numb arms and legs didn't help his situation at all. His whole body felt like there are countless ants crawling on him. He didn't have any real destination so he decided to stop. He just wanted to get away from everyone and everything. It was far enough.

He got out of the car and started walking towards the cliff. The sun was about to set and the scenery was perfect. He just sat down and kept watching while dangling his legs. He wondered how many times more can he see the sunset. He was surprised at how he never really set down and enjoyed such scenery. The sun was there every single day rising and setting, but he couldn't even realize the beauty of it. He was so occupied working hard for a better future, without even realizing, he sacrificed the present time. He felt like cheated. Wasn't it how they always said;

"Work harder, so you can have a better future."

Were they wrong?

Did he just went too far and lost his way?

Maybe... If there was someone to correct him, it could have been different?

All these questions bombarded his head. There were already tears falling from his eyes, wetting his shirt. He cursed his cruel fate. He always did his best and this is how he is rewarded.

He wiped his eyes and stood up. He wanted to release all the bottled up feelings inside him, so he shouted with all his might.

"SEND THEM. SEND ALL THE PAIN AND SORROW MY WAY. AFTER ALL, IT WOULD NOT BE THE FIRST TIME. I ENDURED EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM. I WILL ENDURE THIS ONE TOO"

He turned around and slowly walked to his car.

"Though I might not be here anymore to bear the suffering." Muttered to himself.

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From that day onward he just did as he wished. Sold anything he owned that worth some money except his car. He needed it for his plans. He also resigned from the company he was working. To think how much effort it took for him to find that job and earn enough money just to buy an old car, it pained his heart just to let it go.

Since the day he watched the sunset from the top of a cliff, he wanted to see more of this world. Maybe he didn't have much savings to let him enjoy the luxuries of modern life, but it should be enough to travel in his car and so he did exactly that. He traveled around the country tasting local food and then stop occasionally in the places he finds alluring to see.

That is how he ended up spending the days he had left and he didn't regret any part of it at all. Instead, those days were the only salvation he could find these days. His only regret was not being able to enjoy more of it.

With the passing days his body was slowly falling apart, he already started fainting from time to time. It kept reminding of him that his time was running out.

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He looked at the ticket he had in his hands. It was the plane ticket he bought to return to the city he had lived his whole life. It signified the end of the days he spent in bliss. He didn't have any more money to spend so he sold his car just so he could return back. The reason for his return was simple, he just wanted to watch the same scenery he had at the cliff. He just wanted to see it just one last time.

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He watched as few workers kept working. The thing they were working on was a massive looking swing. He did spend the remaining money he had from selling his car to order this massive swing. The idea came to him while he was traveling. For him, this was some sort of last wish. It wasn't a complicated work, just fixing some metal poles to the ground. So, once they were done with the work, he just sends them away.

Now that everyone was gone he was the only one there to enjoy the rest of the day. The only thing he had left with was his picnic basket. He just spread a blanket and sat down on it while taking out the food from the basket. Slowly he enjoyed every single moment of this meal. This was something he got used to in his travels. He would just stop the car where he can enjoy a picnic then carry on. With each dish making its way towards his stomach, he was truly satisfied. When he had enough he made his way towards the swing. He really wanted to give it a try.

Most people would be afraid or at least hesitant to swing across the edge of a cliff with no safety measures present. But he didn't have those fears, not anymore at least. He was already dying it wouldn't make any difference at all. He sat on it started to swing back and forth. He got faster and faster as much as he could. It felt amazing, at that moment nothing remained important to him. It was just him and the beautiful nature.

'If I can't even take a moment to enjoy the beauties this world could offer, why should I even struggle to keep living and bear all the suffering, right? '

This was the conclusion he came at the last moments of his life. He enjoyed this moment of peace. Even though he kept distracted himself while hitting the road with his car day and night, enjoying tasty food and the great scenery, there was never really a peace of mind. There was a part of him that just wanted to keep living no matter what.

Eventually, he made peace with his imminent death and this was the place he chooses for his final stop.

He slowly closed his eyes and focused on the feeling of the wind caressing his skin.

'This is good. It was troublesome just to find someone to build this, but it's totally worth it.' He kept swinging for a while until he finally let go of the swing.

'If I just had another chance...'