1 1. GIRL Or PAIN

hai, I know that what you thinking about this,

we knew that try is never a sigh of loser.

so, I will introduce myself, I'm akanese I know is little bit wired don't worry everyone call me aksa.

I also like that way.

when I'm little girl I tried to watch Barbie doll shows, princess stories, and tales of fairy.

And sometimes I think like crazy and say bad words to myself because my Prince never showed up. I'm kid so never mind.

I'm always a annoying and nughty kid in my family.

I never obey anyone just do what I want so my parents never blamed on me.

that's is the reason I'm still like that.

sometimes I really thought about superpowers.

just like spider man,wonder woman, Hulk ,capten America.....

but that all are expectations.

At childhood,I just wanted to be in home and play with mom and dad and annoy my little sister's.

but still I just wanted to runaway some where and be alone.

because it's feel like our own family members also not understanding us.

I never expected that my life be like this much worse and dangerous.

When I'm ten years old, my dad was addicted to drugs and alcohol and from that momentum my dad changed like a stranger who I hate so much.

he always drink and use drugs after that,beat my mom yell at her slap on her, but one day

I get tried of this shit, I planned to trick dad.

then, next night when he come home and started again I throw a Bowl with water mixed chilli powder and when his eyes hurted.

mom and we all run away,then we call police

next day police arrested him.

We just think to move on.our father is longer our dad because he also tryed to **** me .

I don't know some how that time god appear in shape of mom.when she come that time.

I don't but I felt safe whenever I'm with my mom.

Last we moved to Kerala in india at my mother's house. i meted my old friends and Started a new childhood life. but never thought about that it's gonna HURTFUL more than past.

and the one day my mom got a job but the real problem is me and my sister's. they said, they will pay High if moma stay there And take care of patients also when dad gone,we had more financial problems In house.so me and sisters moved on at a orphanage.

Mom said, Don't be sad everything is safe, you just have to stay here and complete high school studies.

then, she is also gone... that time I get hurt but later when others girls talked to us that made me happier.

then, I got a room with 8 members including me and I changed my dress and gone down first floor to meet my owner.

he said : we also have some forin children and adults. then he introduced someone to me.

I never thought at first meeting that person going to be a important and presious to me. when he talked to me I just looked In his eyes and I felt happy, to feel like dance and laugh, my focus everything gone ,my control also loses. Then with a shock I looked my owner who standing next to him. And I introduced myself to him and owner took me to show places. but in my mind is stuck like bubble gum. it's like first sight love lol...

I don't what's going on... I'm really happy