2 Chapter 1: Happiness

The dreams of a lonely daughter

<Chapter 1> Happiness

For many people 'happiness' came in different forms. For Reyleigh it was like a tall lighthouse--large and brilliant--but only when one was lost out in the vast and turbulent sea of life could they truly notice and appreciate it. Muffled sounds, blurred images, and numbed sensations; she knew what it was like to live through that 'turbulence' and through those experiences she could come to appreciate the warmth of the lighthouse. Yet at the same time it all felt like one long dream. Friends, family, neighbours, and an idyllic hometown, she had everything she ever wished for and more, but that in itself was a frightening prospect. She was indeed 'happy', but perhaps a little too much.

Flying so close to the sun she feared the fall. 'What if one day she has to wake up from that dream'? 'What if by the time she comes back to her senses everything is gone'?

What she held in her small hands was a very beautiful and delicate crystal ball; one mishap and she could accidentally drop it. This was the nature of her happiness--of her frame of mind. She believed as long as she kept playing the role of the 'lovely daughter' she could hold onto the crystal ball for longer. In truth 'Reyleigh' was just a mask; her true self was much more vain and cowardly--completely unlikeable. She didn't know how to properly interact with others or how to forge real bonds. Everything she did had to go through a filter--through the façade of Reyleigh.

"Foo~!" Reyleigh let out a long sigh. Ever since her father returned from the capital it was nothing but the endless grind of swinging a wooden sword all day. 'With how dangerous things have become lately even a girl ought to learn how to defend herself,' or so was his line of reasoning. Her father--Ark Adele Silverarm--was a member of the illustrious <King's Knight> organization which directly oversaw the protection of the royal family. As such, knowing nothing but fighting, it was probably his own way of helping his daughter become stronger so she could face adversity on her own. If nothing else, she couldn't fault his sentiments. That said, she felt there should still be some limits. "Having to do 10000 swings a day in the middle of this cold climate is basically child abuse," she silently complained to herself. Perhaps it was her own sense of pride that she persisted through the unreasonable training regime. Her father wasn't even there to watch--he was on the second floor sleeping despite noon having long past--but it was herself who wanted to prove she could.

She understood, of course. The nature of her father's job was relentless and difficult. Being the bodyguard for the highest VIPs of this nation was basically like walking around with a huge target on his back. Little sleep, constant vigilance, and permanent stress. At least at home she had to let him feel safe. For this reason she allowed her father, who was away for months at a time, to be a little neglectful in taking care of her. In the first place it wasn't as though she was someone who really needed a guiding hand or constant watch. "I guess it's just a bit lonely," she muttered to herself.

Regardless, hard things were still hard. "Urgh…!" having reached approximately 6700 swings she tossed her wooden sword to the ground and collapsed onto the cool dirt floor of her backyard. Sweat rushed down the sides of her face and all the muscles in her body ached. She couldn't even spare a thought to how her pretty white hair was being ruined by being smudged onto the floor. "What was it he said? Pain was the proof of hard work? Damn, that sounds like something a cult would say," she shuddered. By the time she was more than half-way done through her daily training she noticed the sun had already passed its peak and she had missed lunch. Strangely, in spite of all the exercise she didn't feel much hunger.

"Huh? Reyleigh! What are you doing on the floor?" the voice of a young boy called out to her.

She felt two sets of footsteps vibrating across the floor of her backyard. 'Annoyances!' was her immediate thought since she never gave them permission to step into her abode. Of course, she'd never say that out aloud since her opponents were just kids. She tilted her face up a little and noticed the upside-down figures of two familiar boys. "Lute, Crest," she called out their names.

One was a boisterous looking boy with dark brown hair and scratches all over his face--Lute. Just one glance at him would give any parent an anxiety attack from all the injuries he would be coming home with every day. The other was the complete opposite, a quiet child with calm eyes and a soft demeanour befitting more of a noble than an ordinary countryside brat. A mysterious migrant from the capital city who along with his parents run the only clinic in the village. Loud and arrogant against collected and elegant; it was a wonder how two widely contradictory personalities could get along so well with each other, but the most likely explanation came in the form of a cheery white haired girl who lived with her father on the outskirts of the village--Reyleigh herself.

"I was just resting," Reyleigh replied, not minding her shame--lying on the floor whilst dirtying her clothes. Manners, image, and gender, none of it mattered since they were just kids. She was too tired to get up anyway.

"Rest? On the floor?" Lute asked with a quizzical expression. His eyes naturally drew to her figure after it had become more pronounced due to the wet shirt she was wearing. 'Perverted brat,' she wanted to interject but her arms and legs were completely dead after several thousand sword swings. They had known each other for three long years now so it was basically established that the two shared a strong sibling relationship--and hopefully nothing more. Heck, she even knew about his bold and childish dream of becoming the empire's strongest knight. The story of a simple farm boy becoming the preeminent knight was a welcome cliche that Reyleigh appreciated.

"That's right. Resting," she repeated. "Do you want to rest too?" she asked with a prankish smile of her own as she tapped on the dirt next to her. "It's actually pretty nice."

"Really?" as Lute was about to take her offer, Crest interrupted.

"I don't think that's a good idea," he said with a troubled look. "Lute, did you forget? We still have stuff to do."

"Ah, that's right!" he shouted. "Reyleigh! We need to get some wood!"

"Wood… for what?" she asked.

"For Birth Day."

"Oh, right," Reyleigh had remembered. "It's already been a year?" In this world 'birthdays' weren't something to be celebrated on an individual basis, instead they were more of a shared public celebration. It was always held on the first day of the first month of the year and communities came together to organize large parties and festivals around that time. Apparently the tradition started centuries ago when an ancient emperor was so touched by the birth of his son that he declared it a national holiday, but his retainers stopped him. To appease his vassals he instead made it a national holiday to celebrate the birth of life. Thus to this day it had become tradition, or so the story went, but scholars argue there were no actual records of such an event. Reyleigh believed the gesture was nice enough; when everyone's birthdays are different it leads to people missing it just because they didn't know or forgot. At least this way no one would ever forget and when everyone is celebrating it creates a much brighter mood. "So the elders asked us to gather some wood for the festival?"

"Yes. There's a spot near the entrance of the Karken forest where we can gather them," replied Crest. For a boy only about seven or eight he was strangely mature, even for Reyleigh's standards who was in all honesty a fully matured adult in mind. He moved into the village about six months ago along with his two 'parents', but from the beginning he seemed to be of a different kind than the rest of the village folk. His hands weren't rough from field work and he had such pale skin it was obvious he was the son of a noble. Of course, none of it was her business and as long as he wasn't willing to talk about it she didn't want to pry. 'Everyone had their own circumstances' was the line she took with almost everything.

Reyleigh took a sniff at herself and felt a little bit of disgust now that she recovered her strength. The stench of sweat and dirt wasn't exactly the most pleasant one for a girl her age. "All right," she stood up and dusted the dirt off her clothes. "Let me clean myself off and then we'll be on our way," she said as she ushered the two boys into the living room.

"Huh? But don't we usually spar?" Lute protested.

"I'm tired, we can do it later," she dismissed him.

After setting out a cup of tea for the two boys she dipped into the washroom to clean herself off. Most households which weren't nobility or affluent didn't have much of a set up when it came to bathrooms. The standard of normal people in this world was just a few buckets of water and soap, and even then they'd only wash themselves once every two or three days. It was a little different in Reyleigh's case however as she was technically a noble in association to her father. As he served as part of the emperor's guard he was granted a non-hereditary noble title which extended to his parents and child, but Reyleigh herself would not give birth to a noble child. As nobles were required to take care of themselves to a certain extent the country also provided the Silverarm family with an entire mansion and servants to boot, but was refused by her father who preferred a quiet life out in the countryside. That said, their bathroom situation was vastly better than all the other people in the village. A bath, a toilet, a personal laundry, they had everything a normal noble would, just much smaller in scale.

"Hmm," she had a complicated expression as she stared at her own reflection from the mirror in the bathroom. The petite frame of a girl who looked like a doll gazed back at her with two sharp golden eyes. The colouration of her hair and eyes were quite unique even for a fantastic world like this. She always felt a sense of dissonance to her own body; rather than feeling it was her own body it felt more as though she were puppeteering the body of a girl known as 'Reyleigh Adele Silverarm'. Where these feelings came from was obvious: she was someone living a second life so she vividly remembered the sensations of her previous body. In her previous life she was a man, so the lack of symmetry between the two bodies caused a wide cognitive discrepancy. Even after eight years she still hadn't fully grown accustomed to it, or rather it was because she hadn't yet experienced the development of secondary sex characteristics. Aside from the obvious, the body of a young boy and a young girl weren't too dissimilar. "Well, whatever," she dismissed the melancholic thought with a shrug. It wasn't like she could do anything about it, so why worry? There was one thing though, it was that her new body looked strangely familiar to someone as she grew older, like she's seen this person before in her previous world. Unfortunately, no amount of contemplation yielded any answers. This line of thought too had to be shelved for the time being.

That said, as a person who once lived in modern day earth she was thankful to be born as a pseudo-noble. If she had been born a true commoner and had to live with such horrible bathroom standards she probably wouldn't have been able to handle it.

As her friends were waiting she swiftly washed herself off with a cold shower and got ready. She was a noble in name only so most of her clothes were still that of a commoner's--of a village girl's. A pale white and brown leathery dress that was both comfortable and tough enough to withstand most of the elements. Her hair hadn't been long--only reaching down to her shoulders--but she still tied it back up into a ponytail as it was the most practical style she could think of other than to outright cut it. She also didn't particularly feel like playing dress up.

"Okay guys, I'm done," as she emerged from the washroom she immediately caught the two boys' attention. Lute was one thing, but even Crest was staring at her quite intently. Taking pity on the souls of the two boys whose hearts she stole she allowed them to look for a little longer before clapping her hands to refocus their attention. "If you're done ogling, should we get a move on?"

"Eh?" Crest immediately perked up. "Ah, right… yes, ahem… of course. Forgive me."

Unfortunately, brave Lute was still enamoured by her after-shower appearance and continued to gawk. It was only when two heavily thudding footsteps could be heard coming down the stairs that everyone's attention finally shifted. A large man almost two metres in height came down with a completely dishevelled appearance. 'Ark Adele Silverarm', Reyleigh's father and a member of the elite organization 'King's Knight'. Broad of shoulders, arms as thick as logs, slightly tanned with numerous battle scars running across his face and body, anyone would recognize his knightly visage even without his armour. Despite his impressive physical stature there was still a lot to be desired when it came to personal grooming on days off; unkempt hair, untrimmed beard, and an old musty scent from having slept for almost twelve hours.

"Rei, is something going on?" he asked through his yawn as he noticed the three children gathered in his living room all dressed up.

"Good morning, sir!" It was Lute who replied first as he gave a soldier's salute with wide eyes and excitement. To a boy who dreamt of becoming a first class knight, having an exemplary figure of one so close to him was an unimaginable boon. He eagerly rushed forward and reported on what the elders had tasked them with in preparation for the birthday festival which was happening in two days.

"Oh yeah, that was happening," Ark replied as he gazed out the window solemnly. He had been so occupied with work recently that he failed to notice the passage of time. "Rei is already turning 8, huh?" he said with a melancholic chuckle. He moved his large lumbering hands over to Reyleigh's hair and ruffled them up in an intimate manner. "I guess soon you'll become a lady all on your own and start bringing home boyfriends and such. Can't say I'm looking forward to that at all though."

"Wuh, stop it dad, you're embarrassing me," Reyleigh resisted as she attempted to remove her father's gigantic hands to no avail. "And I just did my hair up too, damnit."

"It's embarrassing, is it?" he nodded as he finally relented. "Yeah, time sure flies when you're not paying attention." For a moment Reyleigh thought he looked terribly lonely. Loneliness was something she was well accustomed to while waiting for her father to return from his long work trips. Her mother had disappeared when she was young so it had always been the two of them, although even before that she understood how painful it was to be alone from her previous life's experiences.

"Come on, don't make that face," Reyleigh pleaded in an abashed voice. "Look, I've prepared something for you on Birth Day. So look forward to that," but then she realized it was possible he had some sort of work that day since the holiday was a nationwide event. Even the emperor would be celebrating it so perhaps he would be called in for security detail. That's what happened last year after all. "Or wait, are you also going to be busy this year?"

Ark stopped and shook his head with a smirk, "relax. I got permission to stay home for it this year. Elaine will be taking my place this time, the poor hag. Hahahaha!" he began to laugh in a jolly manner at his colleague's expense. 'Elaine' was the name of Ark's own childhood friend who became part of the King's Knights at roughly the same time. For Reyleigh she was as good as her own aunt and family.

"I see," Reyleigh let out a relieved sigh. "Okay, then definitely look forward to it, dad!"

"Of course! A present from my lovely daughter? How could I not?"

Once they finished talking to Reyleigh's father the three children left for the entrance of Karken forest located directly north of the village. Being only a half-hour trip by foot it was a manageable place for children to go and gather materials. As long as it wasn't deep within the forests there was also little to no risk of being assaulted by feral animals or monsters. Frequent patrol by the town guards was also a key factor.

"Okay pipsqueak squad, line up! Your captain shall lead the way!" Reyleigh enthusiastically commanded over her two friends.

"Why are you the captain?!" Lute contested.

"Because you're shorter than me, and Crest probably doesn't mind, right?" She turned to Crest for his permission to which he only responded with a light-hearted shrug of consent.

"What, short?!" It was only ever-so-slight but Lute was indeed shorter than Reyleigh by a few centimetres--a fact she constantly abused and teased him over. For the child who dreamt of becoming a gallant hero, being short was quite the blow. Though in truth Lute's father who worked as one of the town's guards was quite tall so there probably wasn't a need to worry in the future.

"Hey kiddos!" As they marched towards the forest they were greeted by a pair of guardsmen who were patrolling around the area, or so that's what they wanted everyone to believe. The more likely truth was that they were dozing off somewhere behind the scenes. Peace oft made people into potatoes. "Where are you going? You know the forest is off limits."

"We were tasked by the elders to gather some wood in preparation for the festival," Crest informed.

"I see, but be sure to take care," warned one of the guardsmen. "Even if you're not going directly into the forest the ground is uneven so it can be quite hazardous. You could end up like 'poor Jimmy'." The character of 'poor Jimmy' was a locally fabricated myth to frighten children about the dangers of going outside without supervision. The only one who actually believed it was young Lute. Crest was quite skeptical and Reyleigh was familiar enough with how adults worked to know better.

"Right, yes. Jimmy. Poor Jimmy," Reyleigh replied sarcastically. "Maybe 'Poor Jon' will be the next legend when his wife catches him snoozing on the job," she said as she eyed one of the guardsmen.

"You little brat, just because you're a bit cute doesn't mean you get to take that attitude with me," he wanted to retaliate but his companion held him back from using violence against a child. "Tch, whatever. Anyway, there's never any monsters around so this place should be safe."

Reyleigh made a sour expression as she listened. "When you say it like that it feels like you're raising a flag."

"A flag?"

"Nevermind. Let's just hope you're right."

Excusing themselves, the trio made it further up the hill where their village was perfectly visible. Reyleigh found herself stopping to take in the atmosphere of this place and to truly appreciate her hometown. It wasn't the kind of fantastical location one might've expected to see in this kind of world, but for her there was nothing better--Karken Village was perfection. She didn't need fancy castles or magical towers, she only needed this place: a warm and welcoming home.

"Reyleigh?" concerned about her abrupt stop, Crest called out to her.

"Hm? Ah, sorry I was just thinking it's a beautiful place," she said with a nostalgic tone.

"It is," he agreed. "Much more so than…" he trailed off, and though she could guess at what he wanted to say she remained silent. The two quietly gazed at the small, picturesque village in the middle of nowhere.

After a brief break they continued on their trail towards their destination. There was a small clearing with several cut down stumps and small trees which made it open enough to where the village was visible. "All right then," Reyleigh gathered the pipsqueak squad. "We'll each take different directions and gather up as much wood as we can and reconvene in an hour. Sounds good?"

"I'm fine with that."

"No problem."

As Reyleigh proceeded to gather wood she felt the presence of a strange apparition lurking at the corner of her vision. Some entity was watching her from amongst the trees, though it didn't feel directly malicious so there were no immediate alarm bells ringing in her head. "Who's there?!" she called out, but there was no reply. Thinking perhaps it was just a figment of her imagination after having tirelessly worked on swinging a wooden sword all day she opted to ignore it for now. However, there was always constant movement just outside of her sight. She couldn't make out the details but it appeared to be a woman in a white dress with fiery red hair. She couldn't help but feel there was an air of familiarity behind it. "Stop hiding and come out!" Reyleigh demanded.

"Is something wrong?" Lute and Crest suddenly appeared out of the shadows of the trees. "We heard you shouting so came," Crest explained.

"Err, no…" Reyleigh shook her head without taking her eyes off her surroundings. "It just felt like someone was watching me."

"Someone's here?" Lute also began to scan around the place.

"Better a person than a beast," Crest added as he aided in the search.

At that moment a large rustling tremor came from behind the three. Too large and lumbering to be the wind, too violent and energetic to be a person. Reyleigh quickly moved forward to shield the two boys behind her. "Something's coming," she said as she crouched down to pick up one of the largest sticks from the pile she gathered. "Stay behind me."