January 18, 2012

Wednesday. Jack's turn. He comes and holds my head under water until I almost drown. Until my throat grows raw from the exorbitant amounts of water my lungs force in. But he didn't come. I don't know what happened. He never misses a day to torture me. …

It's almost time for me to go to sleep, and still, Jack hasn't come. Something must be wrong. It reminds me of that day, the one that caused all this.

September 26, 2009. I was an honors student. I had many friends, a loving family, a boyfriend. It's my fault I'm here. He was so mad at me. We had gotten into an argument earlier. He was mad I cancelled plans on him again. I told him I didn't need him. I left. I went to a party I knew I shouldn't. I just needed to get away from things and get loose. Most of the people there were older than me. I didn't care.

I met a guy there. He was the best looking guy I had ever seen; at least 17, tall, muscular, tan. He had the bluest eyes and cutest smile. He saw me there; sad and alone. He walked over carrying two cups of God knows what. I drank one. Then another. And another. Everything started to blur. He told me his name was Bastian. I was having fun with him. He made me feel special. Made me forget Chris. Oh, my sweet Chris. It's all my fault.

Chris showed up. He saw me, with my new friend. He was mad. He walked over to us, tried to make me leave with him. "Harper? What are you doing here? Who is this?"

I said he was my friend. He knew I was drunk. "Babe, come on, let me take you home." He tried grabbing my arm. I told him I was fine, I didn't need him. I told him to get lost. He stood his ground. Bastian stepped in front of me towards Chris, "I think Harper told you to leave." Chris looked at me and I glared at him. Defeated, he turned and walked away. I looked at Bastian and said "Let's go." It's my fault.

He took me to his car. I didn't care where we went. I was mad at Chris. I blacked out. I woke up here. It's all my fault. My parents must have been devastated. It's been so long. They must have forgotten me by now, stopped searching for me.