51 The confession (3)

Ma Wenyan struggled to find the right words. "Murder…exchange? Seriously, I am not getting what you are saying at all Miss. Song. There is no sense to this! Mom would never be a part of this bizzare deal!"

Jia gave Ma Zhilan a quiet look. "She would if she equally resented a person in her family like Mrs. Meihui resented her mother-in-law. That would be your daughter-in-law, correct?"

Ma Yanyu jerked her head towards her mother-in-law, eyes wide aghast. "You…you wanted me killed…?"

"This cannot be the truth, right Mom?" Ma Wenyan let out a nervous chuckle, wanting to disbelieve these conspiracies.

Ma Zhilan shivered with chilliness as if she tip-toed on a frozen lake of ice. Even though she didn't give any visible reaction, her son and daughter-in-law did as a sharp gasp was heard from their side.

"You say it doesn't make sense, Mr. Ma. But it actually does when you know that Miss. Ma killed Mrs. Dai. She kept her part of the exchange and so did Mrs. Meihui. Or at least she tried to."

Ma Yanyu felt hair standing on the back of her neck. "Sh-she tried to kill me…?" Her voice escaped almost as a whisper. "But I am unharmed…"

Jia gave a slight but grave nod. "She couldn't harm you, Mrs. Ma because she came to know that you are pregnant."

"My pregnancy…?"

"The reason she came to Dongdan yesterday was not to stop her husband from attacking Miss. Ma. It was to kill Mrs. Ma Yanyu. It wasn't a coincidence for her to meet Mrs. Dai Meihui on her way to work. She was following her, looking for a chance to hurt her.

But she must have learned about your pregnancy, and she couldn't go through her plan. That's why when everybody was busy panicking after you fainted, Mrs. Dai was the only one who confidently assured that you were fine and only felt nauseated probably. I had felt odd about this. But later, I knew she could tell because she knew about the pregnancy."

Ma Yanyu looked pale as she recalled. "I remember…I did mention that I was pregnant on the phone. I was talking to my doctor to wh-whom I had gone for a checkup and I was shocked on learning the news...And it was soon after that we crossed paths."

"Yes. I had noticed in the park how Miss. Ma felt faltered and shocked for a moment when she suddenly heard the unexpected news of your pregnancy. I thought it was out of joy. But I realized later. She might have been wondering why you were in the park unharmed. But upon learning the news it struck her why she couldn't hurt you.

Had you not been pregnant, she would have gone through the plan, and she would also have had the perfect reason for being in Dongdan. To stop Mr. Dai from harming Miss. Zhilan. If Mr. Dai hadn't presented that opportunity, she might have already planned some other excuse of coming to Dongdan."

Ma Yanyu felt a deep sickening knot in her stomach and she stammered, wanting to confirm her doubts. "Is it…is it because I lost Juan that day that you loathe me so much?"

"It is because you were never a good mother to Juan," Ma Zhilan tightly held her stick as if the memories brought her immense pain.

"I appreciate you working so hard for the family. I am proud that you are an independent woman. But it is coming at the cost of your daughter's innocent happiness and wishes. Juan wants her mother, but you have lost yourself in the dazzling light of going far in your career so badly that you have gotten blinded to the people close to you. Everytime you keep chasing after your own accolades, but you never get the time to celebrate your daughter's little achievements."

Ma Yanyu blurted out. "That's not true!"

She narrowed her eyes, displeased about Ma Yanyu's denial.

"Do you know that she had won for her best drawing in her entire grade when she was six? It was a drawing of you, Yanyu, but it was the same mother who didn't get any time to cheer for her daughter when she received the prize. Do you know that she eagerly waits for you to return home to talk about her day with you, but that mother is still busy attending meetings even from home? Do you know that she wants you to tell her bedtime stories but you always keep sending her to my room?"

Ma Zhilan watched her daughter-in-law biting her lip and shaking with embarrassment.

"Have you ever seen the sadness in Juan's eyes when she hears that you don't have the time to attend parent-teacher conferences? Have you seen the loneliness in her smile when she takes the maid's cooked lunch everyday to school? Have you seen how she longs for your pats when she is sick with a fever? Do you even know that she wants to learn French because she has seen you talking in French to your clients? She thinks that if she learns the language, then you will be proud of her, praise her and you will finally talk to her."

Tears traced a line on the tired wrinkles on her face. "Tell me, Yanyu. Does a child really have to work so hard to earn her mother's attention?"

"It was just until I get the promotion-"

"How long have you been giving the same excuses, Yanyu!?" Ma Zhilan lashed out, her deepest grievances breaking the walls within which they were contained for a long time. "It is this project, it is that assignment, it is this deal, it is that promotion…do you even realize that you are losing out on the precious years with your daughter the more you bury yourself in your ambition?"

"I…" she choked, "I was going to make up for that…"

She chuckled sardonically. "Make up? Compensate? When? When Juan will lose her childhood? When there will be no time left to make up for it? She keeps waiting and waiting for you, and you keep turning your back to her. But it was still fine. I thought that once you earn your well-deserved promotion, you would finally shower Juan with all the love that she has been craving for. I told her to be patient. But…"

Her cold and flinty gaze felt as hard as steel as bubbles of fury crackled. "But you crossed the line the moment your irresponsibility almost cost Juan's life! You…you let go of her hand, burying yourself in messaging to your colleagues and she slipped past your sight. I had warned you a number of times that it is crowded at the subway. You have to tightly hold onto her hand. You cannot let your attention wander off her but that's exactly what happened…"

The blood-curdling incident of losing Juan still felt fresh in Ma Yanyu's mind. She could still feel the goosebumps crawling all over her skin the moment she had learned of Juan's disappearance.

Ma Zhilan clutched her chest. "Juan told me. She wanted you to buy a toy for her, but you harshly scolded her because apparently, she disturbed your work. She felt hurt and left your side. When I asked her later, she said she left because she was searching for a phone to call me. She wanted me to buy the toy with her because she made you angry. Juan…"

She looked pale and colorless, "Juan would have almost gotten kidnapped had Meihui not found her in time, Yanyu!"