The Demon Among Us

Ring… Ring… Ring…

My alarm was ringing.

"Good morning, my best friend!"

I could barely open my eyes. It was one of those shitty mornings. I couldn't sleep again.

How many days had it been? My doctor wanted me to count how many consecutive sleepless nights I had, but I stopped counting. Counting made me more uneasy.

"Hey. Hey. Won't you say good morning to me?"

I managed to sit up in bed, but I didn't have the strength to get up yet. My head felt very heavy.

"Tch. Anyway. Are you sure you want to stay in bed? I thought you had an important presentation to make to the boss today."

Normally, there would be nothing on my bedside table except my alarm clock, but these days, there was always a pitcher full of water, a glass, and four boxes of medication.

I turned off the still-ringing alarm clock. I reached for the pitcher and filled the glass with water, then took my pills.

I got up. I stumbled towards the bathroom door like an injured animal. Behind the door was a face I didn't like seeing lately.

I entered. I had to go to work.

In the mirror, there was a man with disheveled black hair, as if he had just been electrocuted. His pupils could barely be seen due to his drooping eyelids. If I didn't know him before, I wouldn't say his eyes were black.

They used to say this man was handsome, but no one, including myself, thought so anymore.

"You look like shit, John."

Yes. That man was me, and I was about to start the morning ritual of a corporate slave.

I splashed water on my face, and after waiting for a while at the bus stop, I got on the bus. I didn't even remember what happened between these two. My head was so messed up.

This was a ritual. A kind of muscle memory. It was normal not to remember the details.

Who was I kidding?

In other words, it was a boring life. Especially lately, it had become an unbearable boring life.

"Yes. It's so boring that I want to die."

By the way, I have to go to work by bus. Contrary to popular belief, corporate slaves don't earn enough to buy their own cars. They don't even earn enough to live in a nice apartment in the city.

It takes me half an hour to get to work from where I live. The bus was packed. There was nowhere to sit. Again. I used to not care much about this situation, but lately, for obvious reasons, even not being able to sit on a bus has become quite uncomfortable.

I didn't want to go to work.

Ring… Ring… Ring…

It hadn't even been five minutes since I got on the bus, and my phone was ringing.

Even my ringtone was boring. I just had to set the same melody as my alarm sound.

Why did I even do that?

"Ke ke kek. You worry too much, John. Today could be a big day for both of us. We might have a lot of fun soon."

The caller was one of my colleagues from work. Georgy Smith.

I didn't want to answer the phone because as soon as I saw Georgy's name on my screen, I remembered what we had talked about after work yesterday. We were supposed to go to work earlier today. We were going to go over our presentation one last time, but I had forgotten about that part.

After taking a deep breath, I prepared myself for Georgy's nagging and answered the phone.

"Where the hell are you, John? We've been waiting for you for half an hour." Georgy's voice sounded slightly angry.

This was nothing new. Lately, he always spoke to me in this tone.

"Hey, hey. John. Look! Look! It's that woman. She's on the same bus with us again."

I suddenly realized I had a headache. If I were sitting down, I would be massaging my forehead with my free hand.

"Sorry, Georgy. I forgot about coming to work early."

"This might be your last chance to talk to her, I think. Ke ke kek."

"..." Georgy stopped talking. Now I knew what was going to happen. I guess he couldn't wait for me to get to the office.

"I forgot, he says. How many times has this happened, John? When will you realize that the work you're responsible for doesn't only concern you? You either forget things, come late to work, or do your job half-assed. It's always one of these three. All the employees in the company are tired of you."

Georgy's voice was no longer just slightly angry. I listened to him without changing my facial expression.

"I can't believe the boss hasn't fired you yet..." 

I wasn't going to hang up on Georgy because I didn't want him to continue nagging at the office either. It was better for both of us if he emptied his thoughts while on the phone.

"This woman is truly a beautiful piece, John. It's hard to believe she's an office worker. A body that would make models jealous, porcelain-like white and flawless skin, good facial features, and lips that look delicious... I wonder how she tastes. Ke ke kek."

It would have been nice if I could smoke a cigarette while he finished, but unfortunately, I was on the bus.

I understood him. We worked at an advertising agency, and the work done by the employees was interconnected in a systematic way. One person's negligence would cause everyone's work to suffer.

"Come on, John. Quit being a coward and talk to her this time. Who knows? Maybe something good will start happening in your boring life."

Georgy was too stupid to understand why the boss hadn't fired me, but I wasn't.

These days the company is going through tough times and the future of the company depends on the success of our current projects.

We also had a shortage of employees. If I were to be fired, the projects would have to be put on hold until a new person could be found to replace me. Since I was still allowed to do my job half-assed, this meant that the company was having a hard time finding such a person.

"You should make her ours, John. I'm serious. Ke ke kek."

Even though I couldn't do my job properly, the boss didn't want the projects to be put on hold. But once the projects were completed, he would definitely fire me.

It's been almost a month. Perhaps I should make an effort and increase our work pace. I would prefer getting fired over quitting.

"...Why am I wasting my breath!"

Thud... Thud... Thud...

I'm glad you understand, Georgy. I hope you're feeling better.

"Why aren't you looking at her, John? Are you not looking because I told you to do so? Normally, every time we met, you would ravage her with your gaze."

'Stop talking about her. I have never looked at her that way.'

"Finally, John! After a long time, will you talk to me? You're making me proud."

Of course, I was not always like this. Everything started a month ago.

This voice... This voice, speaking with a tone as annoying as the creaking of a door... The sarcasm it contained... I had been hearing it for a month now. He talks to me non-stop, day and night, not allowing me to sleep or concentrate.

My doctor said it was dissociative identity disorder.

It was no surprise to me to hear this.

There could be many reasons for this illness. Stress, suppressed emotions, long-term depression, a family history of psychological disorders... And I had all of them.

That being the case, I cannot say that I am only twenty-three years old, I am too young to suffer from a mental illness. However, I was genuinely surprised that my alter ego had such a grating voice.

"Yes, John. You're sick. Very sick. Ke ke kek."

Even my alter ego was saying that I was sick. So, I was sick. It couldn't be anything else anyway.

I shouldn't have thought about him. He could hear my thoughts.

My doctor also told me I shouldn't talk to him. It could make my condition worse.

But, what did doing as my doctor said do?

The medications I took were not working at all. My stress and fatigue were accumulating. Everything was getting worse day by day.

Both my body and mind were exhausted.

I wondered when all of this would end.

Or would it never end?

Rather than living like this...

Or maybe…

Should I... end it all?

No. No. I shouldn't think like that.

"Kyahh ha ha ha!" Suddenly, I heard the most incredible laughter I had ever heard in my life inside my head. It was pretty long and heartfelt, but at the same time, it was insane.

"Even at the very end, you're no fun, John. It's not something to laugh about even for me, but it makes me happy. I wasn't wrong about you. Ke ke kek!"

The laughter came from the voice inside my head. It was my alter ego.

'W-What are you talking about?'

I stuttered even in my own head.

"I'm saying that I've stopped having fun, John. Although I wanted to continue this game until you were on the brink of destruction, I must put an end to it now. The time has come."

My eyes almost popped out of their sockets, and then I started trembling slightly.

Something was different. My alter ego had never spoken in this tone before. He was also saying strange things. That's why I was a bit baffled, but the real reason for my trembling was not this.

His voice was still as grating as ever, but this time, there was no mockery in it. It was replaced by vastness, nobility, and evil.

I felt fear, and in a corner of my mind, a possibility that I had never considered before had already emerged.

What if my alter ego... wasn't my alter ego?

Ding... Dong...

"Ding... Dong, John! You guessed it right. Ke ke kek!"

Just then, the bus stopped. We had arrived at the agency. The passengers who had to get off at this stop were leaving the bus one by one, but I was frozen in my place.

'If you are not my alter ego... If I'm not sick... Then what are you?' I managed to ask the question, even though it was really hard. I already accepted the fact that I was sick in the head. I didn't want to hear something more terrifying than this.

"Save your questions for later, John. We will continue this conversation. Now you must get off the bus. The time has come."

'What time has come?'

I didn't get an answer.