Drunk in Trouble

He's drunk again today, early in the godforsaken morning. It's been happening for more than a month now. Her pity's long gone for the fucking drunkard.

She understands the plight of having a heart torn to pieces. She understands how the journey slowly progresses from denial to acceptance. How a person affected usually won't be able to function its best and would only be half aware of his doings. How someone turned into a crying mess and sometimes into a convict. Yes, she fucking get it. Really.

But this fucking idiot who's sleeping on her driveway is still stuck in the denial stage.

It seems like she's watching a neverending loop of crying and dropping dead drinking every day. It is fucking toxic.

"This dumb prick should get a life." she hisses. Stomping her way to her decent size yard, she checked her fences. Good thing the idiot did not damage anything this time. She about-faces and checks the flower bed and nods when there's no visible disturbance among her prized plants.

Next, she checked her open wooden gate for any damage and walk over a figure of a bearded man lying face down on her driveway. Automatically a curse form in her head when she noticed the vomit scattered all over the pavement in front of her house.

"Why am I so unlucky?" She whined taking her phone from her pocket and took some shots of the littered dinner of the drunkard and a video of him enjoying a snuggle with her driveway.

"This is going to be your last warning you good-for-nothing neighbour," she told the snoring man and kicked his leg a little for more effect but the man did not even stir at all.

She hosed down the man's puke, cleaning the pavement with the drunkard's evidence of stupidity.

After taking care of it, she grabbed the man's leg and drag his body out of her property. If someone far away would see what she's doing, they'll probably call 911 on her. Good thing her house is the dead-end of their huge community. Next to her house is a small stream curving all the way to the back part of her backyard, just a few meters away. Someone would say she's kinda isolated but she liked it that way. The only wrong thing is her next-door neighbour.

She sidestepped to avoid the wet pavement and continue to drag the limp body of the man pestering her everyday life.

She looks down when she heard him groaned and realized too late that she's been dragging him facedown. She winced.

She can already imagine the marks on his face and feel bad for him.

Walking around him, she flipped the ragged body and drag him again in a heave.

"I don't even need to do my morning run anymore. Doing this every day is enough exercise, damn it." Panting now, she keeps dragging the drunkard's body along the pavement until she reached the front of his house.

The only nice thing about the drunkard's house is that there's no gate and there's enough grass for his body to slide while she's dragging him. She can drag him all the way to his porch and left his poor ass in there.

Finally, she reached his front porch and pulled his body off the three-step stairs. "My jinxes, with all the alcohol you've had I bet you've already got a beer belly and it's making you damn heavy," she muttered. She's aware that she's talking to herself at this moment, but who cares?

The man's body bounces a little when she let go of his legs. She glared at him as she straightened her back. Swearing that she can hear her bones pop from the exertion.

She walked out of his property without looking back. Not giving a damn if he's going to be crawled over by insects or any rodents present in the vicinity. She'd been leaving him on his porch for months now and so far, he's surviving.

"How's it again this time?" she jumped a few feet into the air and whirled around just to meet the amused eyes of her across-the-street neighbour, Marie. She clasped her hand over her heart. She freaking thought it's the police.

"Again, please don't scare me like that Marie. I was about to lose my cool back there. I'm beginning to think that you're doing this on purpose to kill me and for you to live longer."

The middle-aged woman giggled. Yes, she giggles a lot and likes to act like she's sixteen when she's almost sixty.

"I swear to all mighty Amele, you really need to stop dragging him like that. It's like a crime scene every time." Another giggle.

"I don't have a sleigh for him and my wheel barrow's a no." well, she did have a sleigh but it's a small one and is not enough to accommodate the hulking size of her neighbour.

"You could let him sleep on your couch." the woman said it in a matter of fact way and she almost choked on her spit.

"Why would I even do that?" she asked with brows furrowed.

"Oh come on sweetie, you got to let him sleep on your couch for a change. My, that poor boy has to have new bruises and abrasions every day from all the dragging." and that's Marie, the ever-thoughtful neighbour of hers.

She snickered giving her next-door neighbour's house a side-eye.

"I doubt it. He got it over his senseless fighting more the like." she looked back at Marie just to see her smiling, amused.

"Enough with that poor boy. Here, take this inside and enjoy." a box of the chocolate muffin was thrust into her hand.

"You're not coming inside?" she smiled at the woman gratefully. She always enjoys a plate of sweets and Marie made them deliciously.

"Not this time hun. I got an appointment today for my hair. I'm bringing Hugh with me." she told her, a little giddy.

She's not commitment-phobic but Marie and Hugh got it bad. Them being married for 40 years is a huge milestone for her. She can't even imagine herself living and sharing with the same person for a few years. What amazes her more is how Marie always had this giddiness for Hugh. Well, in all fairness to them both, it goes both ways. I guess someone would always get lucky.

"Have fun on your date then." she grinned at the giddy woman.

"Always pumpkin." Marie crossed the street and walked back to her white picket fence house which is a few houses down across the street.

Doing a turn, she walked back to her own house. Locked the low wooden gate and now trudges her yard in happiness. Imagining the chocolate goodness inside the box, melted her irritation for her drunkard neighbour.

She thanked God for small mercies.

"Thank you, Miss Miller. I'll pass it this noon." the earnest voice of one of her students. She nodded and smiled at the worried student. The kid is working part-time. She can give him a slack for now. "You can pass it at 3 pm sharp. I mean it. That goes to all of you ladies and gents." she heard a couple of yes and holler.

"That would be all for today. E-mail your findings so you'll have your results tomorrow and you'll be able to start with your essay. Make sure to do some advanced reading on the people of the Byzantine Empire whenever you can. Have a great weekend kiddos." she ended the zoom call after hearing her students' groans and whines.

She stretched her fingers in front of her and went to her small kitchen to grab some brunch. She got some left-over Chinese last night and popped it in the oven.

After prepping her fresh milk, she took her brunch and went outside her backyard. She always enjoys taking her meal with a stunning view of her garden and the sound of the stream. The low fruit-bearing trees add more effect to her well-maintained little Eden. The wooden fence, the same as her 5'3 height, keep the unwanted animals from entering her property, hopefully.

She beamed and close her eyes to savour the smell of the roses wafting through the air.

Taking a bite of her Chinese, she chewed slowly, contented. What a nice life she has--

"What the hell!?" Jolted from her seat and almost choking on her food. She glanced at the direction of her fences, specifically on her neighbour's house only barred by her wooden fence.

What is it this time? she thought, reaching the fence and stood on her tippy toes as she took a peek at the other side.

She ducks in the nick of time as a bucket went sailing over her head. This fucking idiot. She whispered as she tried to listen more. The drunkard's out of his mind again. Probably throwing things and fighting the walls of his--

A shriek come upon her lips when the wooden fence she's leaning on rattled. The idiot's punching her fence!

"What's wrong with you!" she screamed, moving away from the fence. Her heart battering her ribcage. She can feel the impact of his fist and she's sure as hell that his knuckles would be bleeding right now.

"She's fucking married that's what! Fuck! She's married! Damn it to hell! Fuck it, fuck! Fuck!!" he shouted back. Still punching her walls.

"Stop it! You're breaking my fence!" she screamed again. Noticing how the fence started to cave in, she almost wanna cry. This man is truly scary.

With one last curse, the man stops and leave her fence alone. A few moments later, she heard the screeched of his tires and the revved of his engine. Totally, on full turbo she assumed. He's a total nutjob. She couldn't even understand why people date a person like his neighbour who's a total cray-cray when provoked.

With her brunch forgotten, she checked the extent of the damage and her lips pursed in anger. She picked the bucket, throwing it back to the other side but she guesses jokes on her. The bucket got caught at the top of the fence and fell back down her side.

"You've almost hit me you fucking jerk!" she said, seething, loud enough for her whole neighbourhood to hear.

"Asshole!" she added.