5 Part 5

I collected the cards back into the deck, making sure to smile at the family who had come for their fortunes. I could hear the circus from inside my tent, crowds ooing and ahing, cheering and clapping. I had secluded myself in my tent for the duration, occasionally getting a few curious individuals who got their truths Divined, as Nick would say.

The last family had been refreshingly sweet, with a young couple, who whispered sweet nothings to each other, and their baby, who cooed and giggled at my cards.

I'd come to greatly enjoy those moments during my five months in the circus. I'd properly learnt how to perform Cartomancy, which, supposedly, I was prodigious at. Whenever Nick mentioned this, though, he had a distinct look of jealousy about him, which always made me laugh.

Not a day goes by that I don't feel gratitude for what Nick's given me. I've found a place where I'm not subject to manipulations, where I could make friends and just be myself.

I thought of Sandy, who had been my closest friend for my entire time at the circus. I'd finally had that dinner with her family, who were some of the nicest people I'd have ever met. My heart rate increased dramatically whenever I thought of Sandy. Of the way her hair flutters in the breeze, like a flame bound to her scalp. Her smile, which seemed to banish all of the shadows and phantom pains that I sometimes still felt. She was possibly the best friend I would ever have the privilege of knowing.

I heard voices approaching the tent, so I prepared my cards for another performance. One thing I'd learnt from Nick, was that Cartomancy was 25% magic, and 75% acting. And, surprisingly, Nick was an exceptional actor. It was eerie whenever Nick went into his cheery Cartomancer persona. I chuckled under my breath whenever I thought about it. One thing that I found missing though was laughter, I'd never heard Nick laugh. I'd all but made an entente that I'd make Nick laugh, and I haven't given up on the cause yet.

The voices stopped outside my tent, too quiet for me to understand anything, but after only a few moments, they entered. And that was when my whole world shattered.

Standing in the entrance of my tent was a young man and young woman. The man was of a height similar to me, though he was broader than I was. He had very short, brown hair, and he had a perpetual smirk on his lips. But it wasn't the man who had caught my attention. The woman had long, blonde hair, which seemed to reflect the bright lights of the circus like a murky mirror. Her face was delicate, with gentle curves and lines making it up. She seemed almost out of place standing there, like a spirit who had lost its way. Her name locked my mouth shut, though, because I knew that behind her beautiful features was a wicked woman, a woman who had forever broken my heart.

'Sarah?' I asked, my voice quavering. Sarah looked confused, obviously not recognising me immediately. But when she walked closer, and her eyes adjusted to the light of the tent, her mouth dropped open. 'Evan, is that you?'

I hadn't done it before, but from what Nick told me about Spirit Walking, this was a similar feeling. It seemed my whole body was untethered to the world, as I seemed to just float away from reality. The perfect life I had created around me shattered before my very eyes. I almost got up and just walked away, but I was rooted to my chair, unable to look away from my once-love.

'I can't believe it,' Sarah said, though I had trouble hearing her as my ears seemed to be ringing. 'What are you doing here, Evan?' I really didn't want to answer, but that wouldn't help the situation any. 'I work here, this is my job.'

The guy who had arrived with Sarah snorted, obviously confused by this odd situation he had found himself in. 'As what, a snake oil peddler?' Sarah placed a hand on her friend's shoulder, probably trying to calm him down. 'Don't tease, Michael, I don't think Evan is a peddler of any sort.'

I wanted to laugh in their faces, anything other than just sitting there like a dolp. 'I'm a Cartomancer.' I finally said. 'If your head is too thick to figure that out, Michael, that means I Divine truths with cards.' I don't know why I talked like Nick, but it helped me feel in control again, which could only be good in the situation I had found myself in.

'Oh, you think you're smart, is that it? I'll show you smart, you little squirt.' Michael looked ready to pommel my face, but Sarah held him back. 'Stop it, the both of you, there's no need to fight.' I wanted to make a retort to Sarah, but caught myself before I could make an idiot of myself.

Instead, I stiffly gestured to the table, asking them to take a seat. Once they had sat themselves down, I picked up my deck, getting into the repetitive procedure I went through with every customer.

'You have come here to discover some hidden truth, I would think, and I am one of the few individuals who may Divine the information you desire.' I plastered a fake smile on my face, which apparently made Sarah uncomfortable, as she was fidgeting and avoiding my eyes.

Michael probably wanted to insult me, but Sarah kept a tight rein on him, keeping a firm hand on his arm. 'What do you want to know?' I asked, my voice straining to keep firm. 'Maybe you want to know how many children you will have, or maybe even the day of your death?'

Sarah looked at me despondently, not appearing very happy at the moment. I revelled in that information. 'I want to know how you're doing, Evan.' She said, her voice pleading. I shook my head, feeling the cords of muscles in my neck tighten even further. 'What I feel is irrelevant, we're not here to listen to my sorry life. So please, what do you want to know?'

'I don't bloody care, just tell us our fortunes so we can get the hell out of here.' Michael growled, glaring at me. I nodded and started the basic shuffle Nick had first taught me. My hands were shaking badly, however, and it wasn't long until I fumbled the cards and dropped them. This amused Michael to no ends, as he guffawed at my clumsiness. Sarah scolded him, of course, but he didn't seem like he cared one bit.

This irked me greatly, and I very dearly wanted to break my promise to Nick and blast these two out of my tent, and by extension, my life. But I didn't blast them, instead I did something very foolhardy. I aligned my intent, closing my eyes to block out Michaels jeering.

I had practised aligning my intent over the past five months, practising whenever I could. I had gotten so good that I could split my focus between two separate intents. I did so now, setting half of my focus on my cards, which I picked up with the invisible force of magic. I started shuffling them, moving them in one of the more complex patterns that Nick had taught me. This was called the third form of Cartomancy, and was very hard to do with your hands. It was exceptionally easy to do with your mind, though.

The other half of my focus was on a purer form of Divination. Nick hadn't bothered telling me much about Sorcery, but from what I could tell, Sorcerers could perform powerful spells that Wizards like Nick could never hope to achieve. I was still a bit murky on the definition of a Wizard, but I was pretty sure it just meant that Nick had to use what he called an Aether Focus to perform his magic. Yeah, I don't get it either.

It was simplicity itself to complete the compound spell, so I finished it off by flicking three cards out of the deck sending them spinning up, only to land on the table seconds later. And with that, I let go of my intent, letting it flow out of my like a lazy river.

I finally opened my eyes, to see Sarah and Michael with horrified expressions of their faces. I wanted to snort, but I kept it to myself. The three cards had landed in a triangle, one in front of Michael, the next by Sarah, and the last next to me.

Michael's card was the King of Clubs, Sarah's was the Queen of Hearts and mine was, disturbingly enough, a Joker. I took a deep breath and told them the truth I had Divined.

'You will marry next year, during spring. You will deliver three children into this world, two boys and a girl. Michael, you will die at the age of 63, finally succumbing to the clutches of cancer, and Sarah, you will live to the ripe old age of 87, finally dying surrounded by your children and grandchildren.' Silence dominated the room, no one dared break it.

'What have you become, Evan?' That question broke me. I had been through the crucible, I had been abandoned by the person I thought I had loved and betrayed by my very own parents. What right did Sarah have to ask that question? She didn't.

I picked up the Joker card and gently threw it across the table, landing on top of the Queen of Hearts. 'I will never forgive you for what you've done to me, Sarah. It was a despicable act.' She looked crestfallen at that, and Michael was too dazed to snap any comments at me. 'You will see me one last time,' I said, feeling stony in my heart and resolute about my words. 'On your deathbed, you will see me one last time, and it will be there that you will atone for your actions.' I felt almost dazed saying the words, because I hadn't actually Divined them, I'd just made it up.

I almost cringed with them, as I didn't like talking so seriously, but I had run my humour dry, and just wanted to send the message that I was rightly pissed. The message had apparently been received, as Sarah ran out of the tent, tears streaming down her face. Okay, maybe I could've been nicer about it, but she had truly done a horrible thing to me, right? Michael stood up, dazedly following her outside, finally leaving me alone. As much as it wasn't Sarah's place to question me like she did, was it my place to also be so mean to her in return. I felt a bit shameful for that, and very nearly chased Sarah out, but refrained. I didn't think I could say anything that wouldn't be cruel, so I just let it be.

I sighed heavily, the tension draining out of my body. Tonight had been an interesting night. Not only had I broken my promise to Nick, I had also done one of the meanest things I had ever done, and I felt incredibly guilty over it, even if it was to the person I hated most. It was at times like this that I would seek out Sandy, but she was busy, probably doing some great acrobatic feat or another. So I just sat there in my tent, thinking over what I had done, and how I could possibly fix my mistakes.

I hadn't yet finished my contemplation when Nick walked into the tent, alcohol on his breath. 'I've got some good news, kid.' He said, his words slurred. Thank God, I really needed some good news right about now. 'I've secured passage to Germany, where we're going to find one of the last Sorcerers left, so that he can tutor you in his ways.' Wait, what? I thought I was the only Sorcerer born for six generations, are you telling me that there are still some alive after 450 years?

Nick nodded solemnly, probably guessing my line of thought. 'Sorcerers live longer than most, kid, don't worry about it.' I sighed once more, feeling like the whole world was balanced on my shoulders. I still didn't understand why I needed to be tutored by a Sorcerer, I could do magic just fine. But I did need some more information on magic and how it worked, because I knew next to nothing about it.

'But what about my friends here?' I asked. And by friends, I think everybody could tell I meant Sandy. Nick stroked his beard, appearing very comical in his drunken state. Then Nick broke out into a grin. No, I'm not joking, he actually grinned. It wasn't your usual smile, it was almost wolfish in nature. 'Well, when I told her that you were heading to Germany, she just about held me hostage until I agreed to let her come' Nick said, blatantly seeing through my poorly made ruse. Damn, was I really all that bad at hiding my thoughts.

I smiled though, thinking about Germany. I hadn't been overseas all that much, I enjoyed my homeland of England all too much for that. But with the promise of Nick and Sandy accompanying me on this strange journey, I felt relieved. Besides, I hear that the weather in Germany is particularly pleasant this time of year.