listen_moon
The story potential is high. The narration is splendid, the pacing and character designs are outstanding. World building is well thought, though the only problem is you need to roughly edit the Chaps. Dialogues are sometimes not starting with capital letters. The punctuations are misused and there are unnecessary spacings sometimes. Making me to pity the story as the potential is great. Write more and don't be discouraged, I know you will improve in one or two years time. Here's five stars to brighten up your mood. ✨
The story has potential. Armed with great world background and story progression, it will draw in readers, however, I did come across mishaps in the first few chapters. It includes the need of proper punctuation and was lacking spaces in areas, but it can be done with editing. Readers can try it out. Great job, author.
It's a beyond interesting concept with good world-building, characters, and story-development. Only problem I have is the quality of the writing. The vocabulary is great, It's just the diction which doesn't poke me right. If the author fixes those small mistakes then I bet this story could become a great one! All the best luck to your author!
The idea and premise of the story is a great one. The idea of a kingdom having such a ritual in order to choose a crown prince/princess is in many way like those in old Norse or even that of Rome where only the act of suffering can one become strong enough to lead. However I only have one thing negative to say and that is the story is moving too fast as it feels like its on fast forward,
There's a lot I liked about this novel. The character descriptions are vivid. This novelist has a real ability to make you "feel" what the characters are experiencing. I thought the plot was entertaining and well-paced as well. The only point off would be in some of the grammar and spelling early on. But for me, that didn't make me enjoy the story any less.