3 Chapter Three

I unlocked Jinho's door and opened it slowly, peeking into the room before opening the door completely.

"Jinho?"

I walked in, half expecting him to be in the bathtub. However, he was sitting on the end of his bed, waiting patiently for me.

"Hello Jane," he said, smiling.

"Hey!" I said, smiling back softly. "How are you this morning?"

"I'm alright," he replied. "Sorry, I was just waiting for you. I'm also waiting on breakfast."

I walked over and set my notebook down on the coffee table. "Okay, well, would you like to eat while we talk?"

"That would be nice," he agreed.

Before I came up here, the HM gave me a timer so I could easily keep track of time. The therapy sessions were to be an hour long, then I'd get fifteen minutes in between each. This would only be five hours worth of my time, so I'd be done by two in the afternoon. The rest of my time was supposed to be for 'planning', but honestly, it seemed like a lot of time. Nevertheless, it was my first day, and I didn't want the HM irritated with me so soon. I needed to gain some respect before I started asking about their methods.

I sat down in the chair across from Jinho. He was on the couch, sitting up, looking a tad nervous. "I'm sorry," he said. "I am quite awkward with new people."

"Oh, it's okay," I told him. "I am too, but we'll be fine." I opened the notebook I had marked with Jinho's name, then sat back, smiling.

I was so incredibly nervous. This was my first real therapy session. I didn't want to get too deep into things, and with those pretty vague tips and stories, I was scared to ask anything that would set him off. He seemed quite nice, and it was hard to picture him scared and curled up in a bathtub, but I didn't want to be the person to cause it.

"Would you like to wait until you get your food?" I asked him.

He shook his head. "No, we can start."

"Awesome..." I set the timer for one hour, then sat back, opening my pen. "Okay, I want you to ask the first question."

He blinked. "What do you mean?"

"Ask me anything you want," I replied, smiling softly.

He ruffled his own bangs and blew through his lips. "Um... how old are you?"

I laughed softly. "I'm twenty-three. You're twenty-eight, correct?"

He nodded and chuckled. "Sorry if that was rude, I was just curious."

Usually people who ask me that question doubt my skill, but he seemed a tad relieved. Maybe less intimidated.

"No no, you're perfectly fine," I told him. "Anything else you want to know?"

He glanced around, biting his thumb nail. I also looked around, confused as to what he was searching for or looking at. "How much did you know about this place before you were hired?"

I was a little taken aback by this question. "Not much," I admitted. "They didn't tell me much at all."

"Hmm," he said. "That makes sense."

I wasn't sure how that made sense, but before I could respond, someone else walked into his room.

"His door was unlocked, and he's not restrained," she said, carrying over a tray. "He should at least have one hand cuffed when he has a visitor."

I looked at her in confusion. "The Headmaster didn't say anything about that."

"Well, we have these," she started. She pulled up some handcuffs that seemed to be engineered for these rooms. It was as if they were attached to the floor and a chain had been attached to them. It allowed him to walk around slightly, but if he tried to escape the room, he wouldn't get far.

"Jinho, your hand."

I watched, secretly feeling quite bad for Jinho. He lifted his right hand and after she set the tray down, took it and handcuffed him. He scratched behind his ear as he watched. I stayed quiet while this was happening.

"Just make sure when you leave, to unlock his handcuffs or call someone to do it." She handed me the key. "You only need one. All of the rooms have the same pair."

I was shocked. "Okay," I agreed.

Jinho was busy putting some sugar in his coffee. The woman left us alone and I backed up the timer a few minutes.

I didn't know what to say to him.

"It's okay," he said. "I'm used to it."

I looked at the handcuffs. "Do they do this often?"

"Pretty often," he agreed, pouring some syrup over his pancakes. "Whenever a therapist comes in, or the Headmaster, or at n-" he stopped. I tilted my head a little, not responding to him yet. "Um, I meant... sorry. Scratch that."

Night?

I nodded. "Okay, don't be sorry."

We began talking a moment later. I was still uneasy about Jinho being cuffed, but like I said, I have to ignore those things for right now.

"So, Mr. Jo, would you be comfortable telling me anything upfront?" I started, speaking softly.

"Well, I guess you want to know about my past," Jinho said. I got ready to write, nodding and smiling softly.

"I want you to go at your own pace."

"Okay, well, I don't mind really talking about it," he said. "My dad was abusive, I was abused, and I left home at a young age." He held out a bowl of fruit. "Strawberry?"

I blinked, but accepted, taking one and saying 'thank you'. Well, that was straightforward, I thought.

"Well, how long has it been since you've been home, or seen your parents?"

He shrugged. "I'm not sure, like, twelve years."

"Have you thought about going back?"

He went off into a slight daze. I was nervous I was asking too personal of questions, but before I could say anything, Jinho said: "No. I've never thought about it."

He obviously just had, but I didn't point that out.

"So you were roughly sixteen when you left your home?"

"It wasn't my home," he said, but looked at me with a small smile. "Home is where the heart is, and my heart just wasn't there."

"Where was your heart?" I asked, writing that down.

"I don't know," he told me. "And I still don't know."

I kept writing. I felt so official, writing, listening to a real patient.

"When we first met, I noticed you were reading," I commented. "Is that a hobby of yours?"

Jinho smiled a little as he cut another piece of his pancake and stabbed it with his fork. "Yes, I read often."

"What are your favorites?"

"I like everything, really," he told me.

"Good to know." I gestured over to the book shelf. "Have you read all of them?"

"Yes," he answered. "Twice."

There were roughly twenty books there.

"Well, is there anything about reading you find comfort in? Is it an escape for you?"

He nodded. "It is."

I took note of that.

"Did you read when you were younger?" I asked him.

"Pretty often," he agreed.

"So you did well in school?" I asked.

"I did decently. I missed quite a bit of it, but when I was there, I enjoyed it."

"Did you graduate high school?"

"No."

I nodded. "Okay..."

We talked for a little while longer, until the timer went off. We didn't go into much detail about why he had PTSD and claustrophobia, which I was fine with. I didn't want him to feel pressured.

"Thank you for talking with me," I said, closing the notebook and smiling. "Here, let me undo that..."

I took off Jinho's handcuff. "I..." I started to say 'I'm not sure I like this', but I stopped. I had only been here a few days! I couldn't question things now...

Could I?

"I look forward to talking with you again," I said instead, smiling. Jinho nodded, smiling also.

"Thank you," he replied. "When will I see you again?"

"Friday," I replied. "So the day after tomorrow."

"Okay. I'll see you then," he replied.

"Alrighty, see you then." I had started to walk out before sticking my hand in my pocket to find the keys, but touched the candy I had bought instead.

"Oh, wait!" I turned to him and smiled, pulling out the candy bar. "I... am not sure if you can have this, but I wanted to do something kind of welcoming." He saw the candy and laughed softly.

"Chocolate?"

"Well... yes. I hope you like it."

He nodded, grinning. "I haven't had chocolate in so long!"

I walked over and handed him the candy bar, smiling. "Well, here you go."

He looked at me, his eyes dark with... sadness? Sorrow? Guilt?

"Thank you," he told me. "You're quite nice."

I didn't like compliments all that much, but being told I was 'nice', or 'a good person', always made me feel good.

"Thank you. You take care," I said.

He waved.

I left Jinho's room, making sure to lock the door behind me.

So now was my first break before going to meet with Hoetaek, or as he called himself Hui. I had fifteen minutes, and I wasn't sure what to do. I decided to just look over my notes and plan out some questions for next time.

I had a few ideas.

When I entered Hui's room, he was laying on the couch, facing the back, his knees pulled up to his chest. He heard me and turned, then jumped up.

"Oh! I didn't know you would be here so soon!"

I smiled at him. "I'm sorry, were you resting?"

"No no, you're okay," he said. "I was just waiting."

I sat down and opened a separate notebook with Hui's name on it. He ran a hand through his hair and sat back down on the couch, smiling at me. "You look quite nice today, Miss Jane."

I had on a long sweater and black tights, along with some boots. I blinked. "Thank you. So do you."

He chuckled. "You're just saying that because I complimented you."

Hui had on a black sweater and black pants, his feet bare, his hair a tad messy and hanging in his eyes. He had a mullet, which worked with his unique face. I turned a bit red involuntarily.

"No, I mean it," I disagreed. I cleared my throat and got my timer out, then suddenly realized I hadn't cuffed him.

I looked at the handcuffs on the table, then back at him. "Um... I... the one lady told me I have to..."

He smirked. "Go ahead."

I walked over to him and he held his hand out. I felt a bit awkward, but he said: "it's okay, don't be shy. I don't bite."

I laughed softly and cuffed only his right hand. "I don't understand why they do this," I admitted. I know it was very early in my job, but it just slipped out. Hui watched me as I walked back around the coffee table and sat in the chair.

"Well, it's more for your safety, in case I have a panic attack or I decide to go crazy and run out and esca-" he paused. "-and leave."

Escape?

"Well, I guess so," I replied, sighing. "Alright, whenever you want, we can start."

"We can start now," he said.

I started the timer.

"Well, I would like to start out my first sessions with you asking me a question. So, is there anything you want to know?"

"Are you single?"

I rolled my eyes and laughed softly. "Are you serious?"

He grinned.

"Um... yes, I am. Anything else?" I tried to move past the awkward question as smoothly as I could.

"Do you date?"

"Okay, this is supposed to be a professional session." My cheeks burned. "Come on, ask me something else."

He chuckled. "Okay, I was just messing around. Um... what is your zodiac sign?"

"I'm a Capricorn," I replied. "You?"

"A Virgo. We're both Earth signs." He smiled.

I smiled also. "Well, it looks like we have something in common."

"It looks like we do."

I opened my pen. "Alright, can I ask you something now?"

"Of course."

"Okay, I don't know much about you, and I'm sure there's a reason for that. Would you like to tell me anything that could help me, help you?"

Hui, for the first time, looked vulnerable. He thought about it, unsure of what to tell me. I waited patiently.

"Um... I... I'm sorry. I...It's hard for me to talk about."

"I understand," I replied. "You can tell me as much or as little as you want."

"Um... I don't know what to say, really."

"Okay, what do you want from me?" I asked. "What do you want out of our sessions? Are you looking to talk about what happened to you? Or for me to help you? What would you like for me to do today?"

Hui still seemed unsure of himself. "Um, well... I want to tell you, I do, but if I start talking about it, I'll most likely have a panic attack."

"Okay," I said, making sure to take note of that. "So why don't you tell me about something from your past that you enjoyed?"

"Hmm..." he started to fidget a little, his hands shaking slightly. "I... I'm sorry. I don't know."

I nodded. "Do you like chocolate?"

He blinked. "Chocolate? Yes."

I pulled out a candy bar and smiled. "Here. I was gonna give you this at the end, but I think you need it now."

He held his left hand out and I tossed it gently to him. "Thank you," he said, smiling happily. "I haven't had chocolate in so long."

"Jinho said the same thing," I pointed out, smiling.

"We don't really get these luxuries," Hui told me as he ripped open the wrapper. He sniffed the chocolate, grinning. "I've missed this smell."

"Did you like chocolate when you were younger?"

He nodded, then looked up at me. "Oh, I see what you're doing. You're trying to get something out of me."

"I really just wanted to give you the chocolate, but I was wondering if it could help," I admitted.

"Well, I did. I used to sneak candy from our pantry."

"Oh? And your parents didn't like that?"

"Um..." he cringed at the word 'parents'. "I... can we talk about something else?"

I was taken aback, but I didn't let it show. "Of course. I want you to decide though."

"I want to know how you got this job," Hui said.

"Oh," I started, shifting in my seat. "I was recommended to them by my teacher. They said they wanted someone with little experience, who was young and did well in school."

"Don't you think it's odd that they wanted you to work with eight patients at once, even though you have no experience?"

I nodded. "Well, the Headmaster said it would be good for you guys because I'm around your age."

"He's..." Hui sighed. "You're crazy for taking this job."

I didn't know how to respond to him.

"Well, I wanted to help you guys out."

"Doesn't matter," he told me. "You're crazy. If they knew I was saying this I'd get in trouble, but look, this place isn't... what you think." He glanced around nervously. "Just be careful is all I'm saying."

I nodded.

I didn't get much out of Hui, but he did make me more nervous. What did he mean by be careful?

What the hell did I get myself into?

I waited for fifteen minutes before moving on to Shinwon.

When I made my way to Shinwon's room, I got a mildly different reaction from him. He bowed to me slightly, looking upbeat, but a tad shy. "H-Hi!" He stuttered, smiling and looking at me shakily. He was fidgety and nervous, but not as quiet as yesterday.

"Hello Shinwon," I said, smiling. "Why don't we take a seat over here?" I gestured to the couch. He nodded and walked over shyly, acting as if I was someone more important than I actually was. He did not make eye contact and seemed a tad intimidated.

I sat in the chair on the opposite side of the coffee table, opening Shinwon's notebook. I had color coded as well. Jinho was red, Hui was orange, Shinwon green. I looked up at him as I clicked my pen so it was ready for use.

"How are you today?" I asked, smiling.

"I'm okay," he replied.

I started the timer. "Would you like to start with asking me a question?" I tried to seem as approachable as possible.

"What is your name again?" He asked. I noticed the things that had concealed his hands were gone, and he was scratching his long sweater sleeve nervously.

"Jane," I told him softly. "You can call me Jane."

"Okay," he agreed. "You can ask me things. I-I'll try my best."

I forgot about cuffing him, and it made me a bit more nervous with Shinwon. "Um... I'm supposed to cuff one of your hands..."

Shinwon glanced over at the pair of cuffs on the table and looked back at me with sadness in his eyes. "I know you are..."

"May I?"

"Okay."

I stood and slowly and gently cuffed his right hand. He watched, his long fingers trembling. Shinwon seemed so nervous around me, and I wanted that to change.

I moved back and smiled. "I will undo this as soon as we're done. I don't like it either." He nodded.

"Okay, thank you."

I sat down and got settled in.

"Okay... so. Do you mind if I ask you some questions?"

Shinwon nodded. "I don't mind."

I didn't know much about Shinwon, so I smiled and thought for a moment. "So... I understand that you scratch."

"Y-Yes."

"Do they cover your hands often?"

"Only when I start scratching a lot. And at night," Shinwon told me. "I sometimes scratch in my sleep."

I wrote that down and nodded. "Okay... and does that make you nervous, or does it help you?"

"I... don't like it much."

I wrote that down also.

"Have you talked to the Headmaster about that?"

Shinwon cringed and shook his head. "I-I don't want to talk to him."

I blinked. Did no one like the HM? I mean, I didn't really have an opinion on him yet, but they all seemed... scared of him.

"Okay... so can you tell me something that comforts you?" I asked, trying to change the subject slightly. "I want to know how to make you feel more relaxed, if I ever need to help?"

Shinwon thought to himself. I glanced around his room, looking for anything that could help me come up with things to say. It was quite hard to find things to talk about with him, but I wanted to use the whole hour.

"I don't know ma'am."

"Well, do you like music?" I asked.

Something switched in his eyes and he looked at me nervously. "N-No!" He starts scratching his left forearm vigorously, his eyes going distant. "N-No music!"

I watched, eyes wide. "Shinwon? Are you okay?"

He started to rock back and forth, his scratching getting worse. His skin had started to rip and blood ran down his forearm, dripping to the wood floor beneath him. I jumped up, panicking, unsure of what to do.

"Shinwon!"

I could barely process what was going on. Oh... oh my god! He was having a panic attack! Oh my god! What do I do?!

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry!" He repeated as he scratched, crying, unable to stop himself. After a moment of trying to unfreeze myself from the chair, I ran to the door and threw it open, heart pounding in my ears.

"HELP!" I screamed. "HELP, PLEASE!"

I looked at Shinwon frantically. He hadn't stopped and I was afraid he would severely injure himself. "SHINWON!" I shouted. What the hell do I do?!

I ran back over to him, not thinking, just climbing onto the table and pulling his arms apart forcefully. He thrashed in fear, crying, trying to get out of my grasp. He almost succeeded, but I held on tightly.

"Shinwon! It's okay, there's no music! There's no music!"

He sobbed and lurched forward. I wasn't ready for when he slammed his forehead against mine.

"AH!" I cried out in pain, closing my eyes and trying to hold my composure. Shinwon had started digging his nails into my forearms. "AH! SHINWON PLEASE! THERE'S NO MUSIC!"

"I'M SORRY!" He shook his head and cried, scratching my arms. My head pounded from the sudden impact of his forehead against mine.

This is not how I expected this to go.

"SHINWON! STOP!"

But he wouldn't. I felt trapped.

Suddenly two other people had run into the room, ripping Shinwon and I apart quickly.

"What is going on?!" One of them shouted angrily at me.

"I-I think I set him off!" I shouted back, shaking. I backed up and slid off the table and onto the floor, climbing back into the chair without looking.

The other person, a man I had never seen, took a syringe and stabbed Shinwon in the neck, injecting him with something to calm him down. I watched in horror and amazement as Shinwon started to grow woozy, then collapsed against the arm of the couch.

"What did you say to him?" The woman snapped.

"I asked him if he liked music," I replied. The scratches on my arms didn't hurt in that moment. I was in shock.

"Don't ever ask him that," she said. "Go down to the office and get those checked out."

I gathered up my fallen notebooks and pen, then hurried from the room, scared I had already lost my job.