Abyss (Epilogue)

"The greatest tragedy a soul can endure is to connect with another… and then be left alone once more. It's like being invisible your whole life and finally finding someone who can see you and hear you, just so they can look you in the eyes and say 'goodbye'." (By Ratana Suzuki)

"Dear Vincent."

First of all, can I just say how much I love your name? Vincent Alexander. It sounds like a warrior. And this warrior chases away the demons. And I'm so glad you found me. What I'm about to tell you is something that didn't cross my mind until very recently, and I'm sorry. But please understand, I did not try to hide this from you. I was just so comfortable with you that I forgot about all the baggage I've been carrying. You see before Seattle.

I have dealt with a tremendous amount of pain. And this pain that I'm talking about can last me a lifetime. And there is no cure. And to be honest, and I never looked for one until I met you so afraid to tell you everything. Because what if you don't see me the same way anymore? What if you change your mind by that is up to you, I cannot change that, I cannot change my life. It's part of who I am. So here goes nothing. But I love you. And that's not going to change. You see, the pain that I mentioned has been awful. And I can never move on from that but I have been trying to by going to my therapist.

And before Seattle, I never had any people to explain all this to only my dad knows. It's always been me and my dad. But I promise you, I got to meet all these amazing people. All these people care about me. I'm very thankful. But all this love and caring that I've been receiving is also overwhelming. Everyone might think that I'm perfect. Even you think that I am ideal, but I'm far from perfect. I can never be perfect.

I take certain medications too, to ensure that pain never goes over the top. You see the pain that I mentioned has no cure. And it's something that I've had to deal with for a while now. And I've been okay with it. And not a lot of people can catch it at first. But when they do they think I'm crazy. I hope you understand that. These medications and my condition is just a small part of me that's damaged. And maybe it can be fixed or maybe cannot be fixed. This condition comes up whenever I'm nervous or sad. And the reason why I have not seen a lot of these episodes is that I haven't been sad or nervous around you. Quite the opposite. I have been lustful, happy, and confident around you and I'm so glad about that. I hope you understand.

I hope you remember the night in Italy, we had a fight and you left me by the fountain and when you came back I was laughing, Painfully, breathlessly laughing? It is due to a neurological condition called Pseudobulbar affect, where in situations of discomfort or nervous it triggers them. So far when I shared moments with you I never got those triggers, and I was perfectly fine. I developed this strange condition after an accident, which ended up killing my baby brother.

Do you remember the first time when we met at the online auction, you immediately guessed that I have an unwavering attachment to this program? You promised me to be involved in every single step and make sure it is accessible by everyone who needs it the most for free like I wanted.

You caught time off guard, Vince. Like if you saw me, not the facade, not the protege and money making programmer, but just me, my pain and indescribable sadness. So I flew all the way from Boston to Seattle, just for that acknowledgement that we are partners in this.

I have been working on this idea since I was 13 years old, and I brainstormed some ideas with my genius little brother Atlas, who had an hearing impairment. I always fixed his hearing aids and his toys. He got upset by that, always asked me to teach him how to fix it, so he can independent. We spent a whole summer coming up with different ideas. I did not get along with other kids nor did Atlas, with an IQ of 156 he was extraordinarily brilliant. He would study Physics with me and do Bill Nye home experiments with me. He would drag me around to follow him.

After he was gone and my mother's overdose, I was lost for a whole year, taken away from dad into a catholic church , I could not talk and go to school. The program was my solace, so I did everything to get good grades and go to a college which had the best Computer Science program-MIT.

I never wanted to share my past because I did not want to be seen as a sob story. It can be difficult to trust someone and reveal the not so happy past, right? I feel light-headed sharing this with you in words that were incomprehensible to me to even imagine telling someone about Atlas.

Now here we are with our whole lives ahead of us together, when you proposed to me with that very same look in your eyes the first time I met you, I knew I had to say yes without hesitation. Just like the beautiful starry night ring you have given me I want the world to know that you belong with me too. I hope you like the ring.

In the middle of the night, waking from this dream, I wanna feel you by my side standing next to me It's like a million little stars spelling out your name. I hope you remember that night in the observatory, I taught you the names of constellations, and you only asked about one, because that's all you needed. So I inscribed them onto your ring. It's the W shaped Constellation along with our first meeting date.

I am going to show you one last thing, I had a teeny crush on you before we dated. And when you shared my bed I would wake up next to you and your scent would cover my nostrils, your lips a little open and you hair messed up and your hands draping over my body. So one day I picked up my sketchpad and drew the sketch of us in the mess of our bed, our hands intertwined.

That's when I knew I love you. I can't wait to get back to you, my home, my sweetheart, my dream love.

With love.

Cassiopeia."

Twelve months later.

"How did this happen?"

"She died after suffering brain hemorrhage, Sir.

Vincent drops to the ground, dumbstruck.

His arms grapple around the cobblestone.

The flowers lying on the grave have wilted and new grass was growing.

He dropped the orchids he had bought.

Tears streamed down his face as he cries in agony for her.

"Cassiopeia Elle Bennett. She will be loved forever" was all that was written on the cobblestone.

Vincent brought up the signet ring he has been wearing ever since they broke up last year and cried even more. The hurt did not seem to pass. All he could remember the last time they met was her painful, almost choking in laughter. The painful look in her eyes was enough to remind him that she had been innocent after all.

What a tragedy. Is this the ending? Was this all he had? Her grave to be cherished by him. He didn't even get to say his goodbye or kiss her for one last time.

"Sawyer, Call Mr. Watanabe that I am ready to step back as the CEO. I don't care anymore.."

He had waited and waited. He kept calling out her name.

Repented in misery and agony and darkness that can swallow him whole.

For hours and days and months but all he got was the deafening silence. And now he knows that the silence would last forever and always.

He lost his dream, the love of his life, Cassiopeia forever.

I don't know how to do this without you,

Seasons change

Is it me? Or is it you?

Is it us that has changed?

That people have been bickering about?

Shall we run away from this concrete jungle ?

Away from This maddening crowd?

Will you step on this seesaw of a relationship with me?

One of us has to go away

One of us has to stay here.

Which one will it be??

Or Was it just a ruse?

I don't know how to do this without you,

To run like nobody's watching

To laugh with heart's content

To command with power

I don't know how to breathe in anymore

To laugh or cry anymore

But I am learning slowly

To hide behind the terse face

To hide behind the scars of life

But I know I'll be Victorious

Even if it is a bittersweet one without you.

I am too flawed to hold you down but don't leave me alone here.

You're always with me no matter where we are.

Like a whisper of a daydream...

THE END

Thank you for reading THE BILLIONAIRE'S LOST DREAM.

Please add this book to collection or leave comments or reviews ,it really encourages me to keep writing. ;)