Ch. (0,1): Positions Within the Four-Cornered Quadrat

After that night, before I could learn how to breathe in this atmosphere... I was already dumped by my dad at my new school. I wore my old school uniform: a combination of a generic white polo and bright violet slacks that scream my old school's idea of their unique individuality. That was my biggest mistake, even worse than wrecking my best friend's family.

Uh-oh. Of course, there's no way I could still call him "best friend." So, scratch that word and forget whatever I said about that.

The new school I transferred to is a private school exclusive to boys called Rosevale International School. The students wear dark blue overcoats with the fancy school's logo, blue and white striped neckties, and dark blue slacks. They look like students in web dramas that my cousins watch after school. With my bright violet slacks, I looked like an exotic endangered species of a peacock.

I filled in some paperwork in the teacher's office. The teacher told me my schedule and what I should expect in this school, and he said I'd be okay as long as I studied. I almost believed what he said until a pile of books was dumped on me. He led me to the classroom. The students were well-seated— they were so disciplined, I guess. Their desks were filled with books and stationery. From there, I had a vague idea of what kind of place I was thrown into—HELL!

"Can you please introduce yourself?" The teacher asked.

I can feel my chest tightening, but I have no choice but to get over it. "Sky Lee." I almost bit my tongue when I realized I had just said my name.

"Oh, Sky Lee, please tell us more about yourself," He asked again. He must have thought I'm an eccentric talkative character because I'm wearing this bright violet color.

"I… I uh… My name is Sky Lee?" I hesitated and repeated my name in a questioning tone.

"Pfft*." The teacher tried to swallow his laugh. "Well, even though it's already the third semester of this school year, you still have more time to get to know your new classmate." My new classmates also laughed. I don't know how they find my anxiety funny, but I guess I have to blame my slacks again.

"You can sit at the empty seat in the back row," he pointed to the seat he mentioned.

I don't know if it was just my imagination, but while others looked amused, some looked at me with pity. I've been sickly as a kid; I know enough how to identify unsolicited empathy from people around me. When I got to the seat, I clearly understood why. A black bag was on the desk, and the student beside this seat was sleeping. He smells like cigarettes too.

I can tolerate bullies, but not second-hand smoke. Don't get me wrong, I don't have good fighting skills or practical social skills to get along with teens in their rebellious stage! I just grew up in an environment with more smokers than thugs, so I'm more oriented about the hazards imposed by a tobacco stick.

The kids nearby did not bother helping me, so I just sneakily sat one of my butt cheeks in the chair and held my bag on my lap.

Our first class was math. The teacher wrote down some equations I never thought would be taught in high school. What is a logarithmic function? Since when did the word 'function' become some Mathematical jargon? What the hell is Euler's number? Can I call him with that to make him sit down and stop making math more complicated? It felt like I didn't belong in this place after just a couple of minutes as soon as I entered.

The next class didn't spare me either, English. Everyone knew how to read the text in their books. They sound like native speakers of English-speaking countries. They talked like they really understand what they were saying.

Meanwhile, the class bully is still sleeping. I was extra careful, knowing I was beside a giant ape who might wreak some havoc anytime. Not to mention, I'm also surrounded by highly-evolved chimpanzees… and I'm a plain monkey from the countryside who hasn't even learned how to masturbate. I know my analogy is weird, but do you know how I felt when I saw monkeys in a zoo once that were doing that? I thought they were stupid! But how about their species that haven't even learned to do that? Isn't that even more stupid?

I was scared. I thought I was the only monkey who evolved backward while sitting around these rich, brilliant city kids.

I don't know how I survived sitting in a half-invisible chair throughout the morning class… but I made up my mind to convince my dad to transfer me to another school intended for mediocre people like me once I got home! Even if I must stop ignoring him as long as I escape this place!

During the lunch break, some kids in the class approached me; when they thought I was boring, they eventually left me to suffer alone. Well, I wasn't in the mood to make friends. I ignored those who tried to talk to me, and they quickly got the clue that I didn't want to talk to them.

Well, not all of them got the clue; one kid actually sat with me in the cafeteria. He wore thick glasses, and I remember him sitting in front when I introduced myself or just said my name.

"You looked very uncomfortable when you were introducing yourself," He said, pushing his glasses up. "I'm Warren Kang, by the way. I'm the class representative. If you need anything, just come to me except when Rainier Seo is involved."

Rainier Seo? He's probably so bright he read my confusion and explained, "It's your seatmate."

"I— Is it because he's a bully?" I asked.

"Huh? Well, he's friends with bullies. But he's not that bad to us... I just hate him. He pretends to sleep in class and does not care about his academics, but he still manages to top the class. I bet he stays up all night studying too. He just wants to act cool. You know what I mean?" He said and chomped on the fried chicken harder, showing his bitter and jealous feelings to my seatmate.

Just hearing that made me ease up a bit. At least now I can sit adequately without worrying if my butt cheek has invaded the territory of a bully. Technically, Warren didn't really say that Rainier Seo is not a bully, but it was enough to help me breathe.

"By the way, I saw your files, and I was surprised that you're top 2 in your previous school with a straight A+ on your card. You must be smart. You see, Rosevale only admits students who have taken the comprehensive admission exam and interview. It's the first time this school enrolled a student this late. Anyway, where are you in pre-calculus already? Functions are easy, but when the questions involve situational scenarios, it's tough and tricky sometimes—" this class rep started speculating.

I am not naïve... I know I don't deserve those grades by this school's standard. I'm also not ignorant of this behavior… he's gatekeeping me.

Before he thinks I'm a competition, it's essential to straighten some facts. So, I said, "It's easy to get A+ in my previous school because it's just a community high school and a class only had seven students. I'm not that smart, I swear. I couldn't even understand anything that was taught earlier."

He clenched his fist and happily let out a celebratory "Yes!!!" I understand his sentiments that it was good for him not to have an additional rival. But how can someone be happy after learning how much of a gap there is between my intelligence and theirs?

When I returned to the classroom, Rainier Seo was not in his seat. So some kids hovered around me and asked more about why I transferred schools. They probably saw me talking to the class representative and thought I was okay with talking to them now.

"Because we moved out of town," I answered.

"Is there wifi where you came from?"

Of course, how can there be none? "Oh, sometimes," I answered as if I was selecting responses from a sociological qualitative study questionnaire.

"Is there a convenience store there?"

'Oh my god, help these city kids… Why would it matter if there's a convenience store where I came from?' I swallowed my complaint and lazily responded, "We don't."

"Sky, did you have a girlfriend back home that you left?" One guy teased me.

I swallowed the anxiety building in my throat. I brushed it off with a quick laugh and said, "Oh, nothing like that."

…

Let me honestly say the only thing I was looking forward to living in this city… I have downloaded a dating app for gay men on my phone that connects you to those who might be in close proximity to you— it's called You-Boo. Besides that, it also shows the distance between people regardless of how far they'd be.

There's literally no gay man using that popular app in the countryside.

But not in this city. I checked the app on our way yesterday during that traffic, and I guess my former best friend is right, "City people are indeed wild."

Oh. Shit. Scratch that word again.